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Old Movie Review Thread

Discussion in 'Pop Culture Board' started by $100T2, Oct 30, 2009.

  1. Celos

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    You missed one fucked up ending.
     
  2. Jimmy James

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    Red State

    Red State is the newest movie written and directed by Kevin Smith. While some of the dialogue is extremely Smithian, the rest of the film is not. There were multiple instances where you could have cut the tension with a knife, yet there were instances where I was laughing my balls off. All the actors played their parts perfectly. From Michael Parks as the leader of the fundies, to John Goodman as the conflicted ATF agent. The thing I loved the most about this movie is how rooted in realism it was, despite the fact that it was a horror movie. You could easily see Red State as a front page story of a newspaper.

    This movie was easily worth the $10 I spent to see it on demand.
     
  3. Crown Royal

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    Deadgirl (2008)

    You will be hard pressed to find a movie of any kind with sicker subject matter than this film. It's rotten to the core and unflinchingly horrifying, the story of a trio of slacker high school friends who, while touring an ultra- creepy old abandoned insane asylum (is there ANY other kind?) discover a pretty naked girl strapped to a table who could not have possibly survived in the wing she is buried in. She has no pulse, but she's alive....undead, whatever. They have to keep her tied down because she is not only a zombie, but incredibly malevolent and ferocious (and naturally, contagious).

    So, they decide to "keep her"....as a living rape doll. Yeah. Predictably, things get out of hand and soon other school kids are brought in the midst of the violent zombie, with repulsive results.

    I honestly don't know who would want to think up an idea like this. Sociopathically, the two directors blend the disgusting plot with typical coming-of-age atrocities like being picked on by bullies in school and lusting after the hot girl, who OF COURSE dates said bully. And the climax? Madness. Pure, absolute fucking madness. The film's finest moment IS well worth seeing, however: an off-colour comedic scene involving a failed kidnapping at a gas station that had me gasping with laughter.

    I did not enjoy watching this movie, and nobody should. Original? Yes. Slightly better acted than a typical b-horror film as well (thought the supporting cast is atrocious), but this film I abso-fucking-lutely guarantee most of you will turn off long before it is over. It's not the goriest or most upsetting film I've seen, but it burns a hole in your soul watching it. People who write and direct films like this should be deemed a threat to society. Sick, sick, sick.

    4/10
     
  4. Now Slappy

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    Ok, so I ran across this movie last night scanning through Encore channels and HOLY SHIT! I found this to be a cross between Ren and Stimpy and Fritz the Cat.

    So much awesome, I give you...


    The Haunted World of El Superbeasto.



    Do yourself a favor and see this movie.
     
    #444 Now Slappy, Sep 18, 2011
    Last edited by a moderator: Mar 27, 2015
  5. Nick

    Nick
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    Lake Mungo

    My wife and I watched this over the weekend. With Halloween only a few days away, I've got a hard-on for horror movies, and I found this one on iTunes. If you like the small budget "supposedly-real-but-not-really-real" faux-documentaries like Paranormal Activity or Blair Witch, this is definitely worth watching. Unlike Blair Witch or Paranormal Activity, there is actually some production value in this film. You won't get a headache from a shaky camera. The acting is believable, and the pacing is pretty good for a movie of this sort. Since it is shot in "true" documentary format, with "made for TV" editing, the premise is actually somewhat believable and storyline covers a lot of ground. There's really only one memorable "HOLY SHIT" moment, but it's well placed and the buildup makes it worth the wait. You can read the link for the story line, but IMHO, this is definitely a top watch in the spirit of the Halloween season.

    My Rating - 7/10
     
  6. Crown Royal

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    Bram Stoker's Dracula (1992)

    Polarizing epic I remember well was easily the most talked-about film at school all year when it came out. Bravest, boldest and best of all filmizations of this novel is the only one that's at least superficially faithful to the storyline of Stoker's novel, but Francis Ford Coppolla uses it as a springboard to incorporate every single movie orifice you can possibly think of to pull off the intoxicatingly sumptuous aura this movie breathes from start to end- all effects are old school not matter how good they look, and the cast works well aside from casting Keanu Reeves as Jon Harker. Puh-lease.

    This version stows away the garlic, sunlight and other assorted faggotry to allow the viewer to drink in its incredile sights and sounds, anchored by Wojec Killar's unforgettably menacing music score that's second to none. Confusing and weird at times, but also beautiful, erotic and never forgets that it's a horror film.

    9/10
     
  7. Czechvodkabaron

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    There's Something About Mary (1998)

    I watched this over the weekend. I am a big fan of the Farrelly Brothers and this my favorite of their films. Ben Stiller stars as Ted Stroehmann, a pretty normal guy who is in his late 20s or early 30s. The film opens with him telling a therapist about how he scored a prom date with Mary (played by Cameron Diaz), one of the most popular girls who he went to high school with. The date did not end up happening because of an "accident" he had at her house when he went to pick her up. She and her family moved away shortly after that incident occurred and he lost contact with her. Thirteen years later he finds himself wanting to reconnect with her, and he does after he sends a private detective (played by Matt Dillon) to spy on her.

    In addition to Ted, it turns out that about 4 or 5 other men have fallen for the highly successful and very attractive Mary, with some of them vying for her affection under some strange and hilarious circumstances. Even with all the comedy I felt for Ben Stiller's character and found myself rooting for him. All of the actors in the movie are well-cast, and most of the characters are likeable or at least amusing in their own way. Like most Farrelly brothers films it derives many of its laughs from gross-out gags. There are also some fun surprises that occur throughout the movie.

    The only weakness in the movie is that there is no need for it to be nearly 2 hours long. I think that they cut have cut out the hitchhiker/jail part. Overall it is an excellent movie and one of my top five favorite comedies of all time.

    95/100
     
  8. Crown Royal

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    Scarface (1983)

    Guys, bear with me here. I know that giving any review less than perfect is sure to offend the crowd of people in here that wish THEY TOO were an unlikable drug kingpin, but whenever I get into a discussion with somebody about this movie I keep thinking we just weren't watching the same film.

    This ultra-80's contemporary remake of the raw, harsh 1932 classic is simply a three hour excuse to wallow in excess. Despite what people try to explain to me, you can't convince me that Pacino doesn't give anything but an embarrassing, over-the-top performance as Tony Montana who in the film looks greek and sounds like an angry, marble-mouthed Mexican. Every single character in this film is a miserable, backstabbing lowlife I wouldn't wipe my ass with in real life and when you have nobody to root for, you have to film to root for. The for-it's-time music score is nauseating to listen to, and Brian DePalma offers little else but stylized violence in a period of over 180 minutes. Laughable in almost any aspect, but also utterly watchable if you can accept it as tongue-in-cheek.

    Still, in the last decade its become an explosive pop culture phenomenon, with the image of Tony Montana adorning everything from t-shirts to lampshades and Tony himself being hailed by hip-hop fans and the like as an underdog hero to root for and idolize! These are the same schmucks that decided to turn pimps into heroes a few years ago. The world is yours, indeed.

    4/10
     
  9. downndirty

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    Warrior.

    I don't know how old this movie is, but it features Tom Hardy, Nick Nolte and the hot doctor from House. It's Rocky for MMA fighters, only with a couple of twists. Emotional, unrealistic and it felt a lot like Miracle, only (as far as I know) not based on a true story.

    I enjoyed this a lot, as did the Girlfriend. It had a lot of the sports-movie cliches, but it was well done and Nick Nolte as a haggard, reformed alcoholic is worth watching. Tom Hardy does his best mix of "On the Waterfront" and "Rocky", and it comes off as pretty good. Both of the lead actors looked like fighters, and the movie shyed away from the "dude, rage, metal, tapout" fuckery associated with MMA.

    If you like sports movies, this is certainly one of the better ones in recent years, and compared to any other film I've seen portraying MMA, it might as well be the Godfather.
     
  10. Crown Royal

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    Collateral (2004)

    I was absolutely shocked at the "mixed reception" this film received on its release. I saw it in the theatres and I don't remember being glued to a movie like this since God knows when.

    NOBODY knows how to shoot On Location like Michael Mann. He doesn't stick the stars in front of the most well-known tourist attraction to TELL you you're in L.A. He chooses the BEST and coolest locations instead. Unique bars, dark alleys, large office spaces, crowded wet streets, the movie is somewhat of a tribute to Los Angeles in the way Woody Allen tributes New York, only it's tolerable.

    Mann's handling of this film is nothing short of dead-to-rights, casts his two leads against type brilliantly: Tom Cruise as the silver fox Vincent has never been more magnetic- as the sociopathic hitman he is unflappable and diabolical, and NO actor has ever held a gun more convincingly (he went under MONTHS of firearms training for just this role). Jamie Foxx is nothing short of a revelation in this film. I HATED the guy in the past- his annoying, fast-talking shtick grew tired for me back in the 90's. In this, he buries that sterotype as an appealing, charismatic and utterly average man who is simply terrified for his own life against an opponent who cannot and will not be out-smarted.

    I was not a fan of digital films until this one. Mann's in-your-face, pseudo-documentary style of filming makes it almost claustrophic, all actors are at the top of their game, the music score is top-notch, and from the word go it has an aura of menace and suspense that never lets up for a minute. Only the slasher movie-inspired climax is a bit of a letdown. Howeever, it commands multiple viewing so you can catch all the riches buried in it.

    I can watch this film again and again. Don't dismiss it just because you don't like Tom Cruise. It's too good for that.

    9/10
     
  11. downndirty

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    Senna (2010)

    Holy shit, the 3 hour version of this movie was incredible. Well worth it. It details Aryton Senna, a Brazilian Formula 1 driver in the heyday of F1, with one of the greatest rivalries in all of sports, ever: Aryton Senna and Alain Prost. This was before my time, but it's a great sports documentary, even if you don't know anything about F1. Just beware, because much of the film is in Portuguese or French, so subtitles are necessary.

    The American (2010)

    George Clooney as an American...gunsmith? Assassin? Being chased by the Swedes? I don't know. It was like Drive, only more boring. I was expecting a smooth, toned-down action flick, (Bourne with grey bush) but what I got was the most boring holiday and 3 murders ever had in Italy. He dates a prostitute, Pretty Woman-style and she was spectacular naked, which was about all this had going for it. The scenery was gorgeous, each scene was masterfully constructed, and you legitimately sense the paranoia, loneliness and frustration with the main character, but no story comes out of it. Meh.
     
  12. downndirty

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    The Shadow (1994)

    I vaguely remembered this from when I was a kid and decided to force it upon the Girlfriend who loves cheesy noir. This is actually a decent movie and we both enjoyed it. Alec Baldwin shows how awesome he is, you can literally see Sterling Archer look back at you from one scene. Anyway, Baldwin is Lamont Cranston, an aristocrat in 1920's New York with supernatural mind control powers he got from being an opium mogul and his confrontation of a descendant of Genghis Khan.

    The good: the effects. I was surprised at how well the effects stood up; they genuinely enhanced the story, it wasn't just showing off. John Lone was a pretty good villain, actually. The silly, campy, comic-strip themes were well-done and Baldwin was just fun to watch.

    The bad: aside from it being based off a comic strip, not a lot. It's childish fun, but what did you expect from a movie that's placed alongside Dick Tracy and The Rocketeer?
     
  13. Crown Royal

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    True Lies (1994)

    This is one of the great Hollywood entertainments of the 90's: super huge, super exciting and super funny. Of course it's big, expensive stupidity and an excuse to team up Arnie and Cameron again, but it pays off in spades: The four central action scenes are second-to-none (especially the knockout Harrier climax), the humour is first-rate, with Tom Arnold and Bill Paxton giving the funniest performances of their careers, and it never takes itself too seriously. Lags here-and-there during the middle frame only to be revved up again for non-stop mayhem the last forty minutes.

    A popcorn movie at it's zenith. Impossible to dislike.

    8/10
     
  14. Dmix3

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    I believe you've unintentionally omitted one of the best parts of the movie in your review...

    [​IMG]
     
  15. Crown Royal

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    That's one of "Those Scenes" guys have engraved in their head, like an impossibly nubile Phoebe Cates getting out of the pool or Meg Ryan's fake coffee shop orgasm back when she was radiant and her face could move.

    Jamie Lee is a Babe Of Yore.
     
  16. Kubla Kahn

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    I was never impressed with either scene you mention. Phobe Cates is hot in the scene but the 80's music kind of killed the fantasy of the 80's male fantasy (though it is kind of iconic). As for Meg Ryan's scene, it was shot to be uncomfortable, for laughs, and that's what I feel when watching it. On the other hand Jamie Lee Curtis has a rocking body, shot perfectly, and is as sexy as a non nude scene can be. Plus, Cameron's prodigious use of CGI really helped editing out Jamie Lee's penis. She can slather Activa all over them melons while I motor boat them.


    Contact- Watched it tonight. I remember liking it a lot more when I was younger. I still like the science fiction concepts that they go over in the film but a lot of stuff is handled heavy handedly. Besides Jodie Foster the only character given any depth is Matthew Mchuanahuannehey. Poor choice. Though some big themes are discussed, science vs. religion being the biggest, most of the actual dialogue concerning the heavy subjects is handled with smarmy arguments filled with witty retorts. Honestly the dialogue doesn't do the subject matter justice. Still the awe and wonderment was still there.


    7/10
     
  17. manbehindthecurtain

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    Jailed Lee Curtis is pretty hot.... For a hermaphrodite. No really, look it up.
     
  18. Smatek1001

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    Do you have anything to back this up?

    I'm going to go out on a limb and guess that you didn't run this by Snopes...
     
  19. manbehindthecurtain

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    Well besides my complete smart phone typing fail, my "source" was from a professor of medicine from Penn med. I'm not a doctor, but my wife is, and as it was explained to me, Curtis has a chromosonal disorder that makes her ambiguous anatomically. Ie, she has the external goods, due to surgery but no hardware on the inside.

    Does she have biological kids? I mean I don't care either way, and she clearly identifies as a very attractive woman, but I just thought it was interesting. Plus, she was only the second hottest woman in that movie. Shes not as hot as Wayne's girlfriend.
     
  20. iczorro

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    So I'm guessing you also believe that Richard Gere has had a gerbil stuck up his ass for the last 25 years?