Some quick suggestions: Dark City (1998) A great sci-fi movie. And the main character is played by Rufus Sewell. What's not to like? The Host (2006) A quirky Korean comedy/horror about a monster running amuck in Seoul and a bumbling father trying to get back his little girl who the monster stole. It's hard to say what exactly makes this movie so good, but it is. So go watch it. Jonestown: The Life and Death of Peoples Temple (2006) A documentary about the People's Church that led over 900 people to suicide in 1978. The movie is composed of interviews with survivors and archive footage. It does a great job of simply retelling the story and it's a story worth watching. I consider myself to be a heartless bastard, but at the end of this movie I was sobbing like a little kid. It Might Get Loud (2008) Another documentary, this time about music, or more specifically, the electric guitar. All three share stories about how they started playing, what is it about the instrument that appeals to them etc. They also just play some songs together.
Don't Tell Mom The Babysitter's Dead What an awesome movie. From the far-fetched plot, to the music montages, to the one-liners "park it yourself, Metallica breath", this movie has it all. I don't know anyone who has seen this movie and hasn't liked it. 10/10
Black Dynamite (2009)- A parody of 70's blaxploitation films, with a typical black action star of that period complete with giant afro and moustache. He fights against The Man, who is not only flooding the ghetto with crack, but the even more insidious malt liquor. It's a great premise for an action comedy, and I was excited about watching it. However, it left me slightly disappointed. The directing and editing was awful, with discontinuous shots and scenes. And I'm not talking about the ones done for comedic effect; frequently, events were so disjointed that they reduced the humor or excitement, or simply drew me out of the movie. The script was alright, but lacked jokes, especially in the middle portion of the film. Michael Jai White was adequate as the lead, but he was no Fred Williamson. That is, he lacked the kind of subtle humor and cool that the best 70's blaxploitation stars had. Most importantly, in their rush to cram as many parody scenes as possible into this (some of which really missed the mark), they often missed the flavor of the blaxploitation films. All that being said, the last 30 minutes were genuinely very funny, and made for a strong ending. Overall, the concept was strong enough to carry through the weaker moments. Enjoyable movie, loosely recommended. 69/100
Last man standing The level of cool in this movie is pretty high. The western movie made me think of this one. It's a good time-waster, if nothing else. I'd recommend it to action film lovers.
Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom Watched this late Saturday night after not having seen it for maybe 15 years. Pissed me off from beginning to end, I am now about as anti Spielberg as it is possible to be. Jaws was pure luck, the man is a hack who makes kids movies. Which was ok when I was a kid, not so much now. 2/10
Fantastic Mr. Fox (2009) It's a 75 minute stop-motion film about personified woodland creatures that talk, walk upright, have suits and ties, and listen to Walkmans. Even worse, it's directed by the painfully overrated hipster douche Wes Anderson. In other words, I never would have watched it if it weren't for some major recommendations. But I'm glad I did, because the film is legitimately awesome. It follows the adventures of Mr. Fox, a selfish asshole played by George Clooney who kills chickens from the neighboring farmers. Once the humans find out, they take their guns and decide to kill all the woodland creatures. Thanks to being shorter (since stop-motion is incredibly difficult and time-consuming) the movie is brilliantly paced, with non-stop jokes and action scenes. And it's very, very funny throughout, with both physical humor and great dialogue, along with clever, original action. A genuine joy to watch. That being said, I would have considered it one of the best films I had ever seen, except Spoiler I disliked the unnecessary vilification of the farmers, and the consequence-free, morale-less conclusion to Mr. Fox's tale. He's a selfish asshole dangerous to those around him who doesn't change at any point in the story. If he had died at the end, I would have given this a score well into the 80s. It's still an excellent movie, though. 78/100
The thing you have to understand about The Room is that it's meant to be seen in a packed theater where everyone there either understands the rules of mocking it mercilessly or is prepared to be inducted into the brotherhood. If you're not throwing spoons at the screen and footballs to strangers, singing the Full House theme at the top of your lungs and shouting misogynistic things to the actors, you're doing it wrong. I was at a screening where one of the actors, who hadn't given much thought to the movie since it was made, was in attendance because a friend of his had told him it had turned into a big thing. His plan was to sit at the very back of the theater and sneak out at the end. Unfortunately for him he was recognized and a chant brought him down to the front for an impromptu Q&A session. Highlights of which include: Fan: True or false, your character doesn't appear in the second half of the film because you realized what a pile of shit the movie was and simply walked off the project? Him: True Him: If you thought the final product was bad, you should have seen the rehearsals Random fan: Holy Shit! There were rehearsals?! Focus: Like was said, The Room is simultaneously one of the worst movies, and one of the best movie going experiences, ever.
Prizzi's Honor Alright, Chater is probably going to delete this because I am panning a Jack Nicholson movie, but this was god-awful. It's about these two mob hitmen (hitwoman?) who get married after meeting each other in passing at a wedding. I swear they only exchanged about 5 lines with each other, then Jack Nicholson tracked her down to the other side of the continent and proposed to her! Don't people call such actions "stalking" these days? And these people (Jack Nicholson and Kathlene Turner) were middle aged folks, not naive teenagers who believe in love at first sight. So they get married, and later on, Turner gets an order to whack Nicholson. She tells him, and they try to make a deal with the Prizzi crime family (whom Nicholson works for; Turner is a free-agent hit-person). Then Nicholson gets an order to kill Turner, because she whacked a cop's wife, and the cops are putting pressure on the Prizzi crime family to find out who did it and make it right. After dawdling around for half an hour or so (viewing time), he kills her in the end and goes back to his old girlfriend, Anjelica Huston (who he dumped for Turner). Leonard Maltin, that fucking hack, gave this movie three and a half stars, the same number that he gave to Heat and Pulp Fiction, which are both infinitely superior films. This movie wasn't worth the $.99 I paid to rent it. The only redeeming factor was that Anjelica Huston looked wonderful in this picture. I'd go back in time to lay her out good and proper.
RocknRolla Just rent it or buy it. It's one of those movies that you have to watch without multi-tasking. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/RocknRolla Just a really well done flick. Hurry up and watch it or I'll give ya a famous Archie slap,
Not that old, but I just watched The Box last night, the movie with Cameron Diaz and Frank Langella. If you don't recall the premise, a couple (Diaz and Cyclops) receive a box from Langella, who has half a face. If they push the button on the box, they get a million dollars but someone in the world they don't know will die. What a piece of shit. It was entertaining and suspensful enough, but the first half of the movie drags horribly, Cameron Diaz is just awful, the plot is stupid, the resolution is stupid, the whole idea behind the movie is stupid, the explanations are stupid... I'll say it again. What a piece of shit. It is a shitburger. It's like sitting down for 2 hours and being forced to eat a massive shitburger. DO NOT WATCH.
Deathstalker (1983)- I heard that this was an extremely low-budget knock-off of Conan that was entertaining. Not expecting anything great, I was just hoping for some violent action and humor, intentional or otherwise. Unfortunately, this lousy video failed at even this objective. The editing and continuity is among the worst I have ever seen; in one shot, the character is standing beside a door, in the next he is sitting in the middle of the room, and in the next one back by the door again. It's not funny so much as it confusing and disorienting. This happens roughly once every few minutes, and the events, which don't make sense to begin with, are even more scattered and random. But most importantly, what should have been violent and bloody battles are awfully choreographed, censored, with laughable, cheesy effects. There is astonishingly little gore or cool deaths, AND the fighting looks like a bunch of mentally challenged 10 year-olds swinging sticks at one another. In fact, the action scenes are far outweighed by the titties and hot women. While I'm not opposed to that, and some of the girls are really hot, (especially the girl, Lana Clarkson, whose head was blown off by Phil Spector in 2002) I would have watched a porn film if I wanted that. The movie is mostly confusing, crappy, humorless, and dull. If you want mindless action with a dash of comedy, there are better choices than this abortion. 25/100; +20 points for the hot women and the pig monster, the only funny part of the video.
Patti Rocks: Here is one of my favorite old movies. It's a road trip movie. Some of the funniest dialogue I've ever heard. Made in 1987, it almost received an X rating for filthy language. That's about as much of a review as you will get from me other than to say that women likely will not like this movie, even though the female lead is a strong character. Anyway, here is a clip. http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0095835/usercomments
A Clockwork Orange (1973)- In general, I feel Kubrick is the most overrated director ever, and some of his work is either mediocre or flat-out sucks. (Eyes Wide Shut) But "Clockwork Orange" is absolutely phenomenal. For the few who haven't seen it, it's about a futuristic, distopian British society where teenager Alex and his buddies drink drugged milk, and go around every night beating up and raping people. Alex's only other joy in life is his love of Beethoven. It's deliciously evil and unpredictable; a garish nightmare of the future with bright colors and sex everywhere. There is a wonderful current of black humor, and Alex's occasional, sociopathic narration is one of the few examples of exposition being a positive trait in a movie. Most importantly, the acting of Malcom McDowell as Alex and the overall character are both among the best I've ever seen in a movie. He puts the Joker played by either Nicholson or Ledger to absolute shame. The only slight criticism is the decent but not great ending, and the lacking editing for the prison scenes. By far Kubrick's best film, a genuine masterpiece, with all his positive traits as a director on display. 87/100
I find his movies to be very hit and miss, but man, he's got some monsters to his credit. Spartacus Dr. Strangelove 2001: A Space Odyssey A Clockwork Orange The Shining Full Metal Jacket All on my top 50 list. Eyes Wide Shut... well, let's just say that I enjoyed Ishtar more.
For me, 2001 is the most overrated film ever; how do people manage to sit through that one while staying awake? In fact, that single movie is the biggest source of my irritation with people overpraising Kubrick. The Shining and Full Metal Jacket were both good films, but in my opinion, not great. Haven't watched Spartacus or Dr. Strangelove yet. Maybe those will change my mind about him after the awesomeness of ACO.
I guess a lot of it could be from the impact that 2001 had on me. I remember lining up and seeing the original Star Wars in the theatre when I was a kid, so needless to say at the time, 2001 was a ground-breaking movie. Sure, by today's standards it's severely lacking, but I've always been a huge sci-fi nut, and have devoured and enjoyed all of Arthur C. Clarke's books, and that has more than likely heavily influenced my take on the movie. And Kubrick used a large part of that movie to introduce "outer space" to the movie-going public, doing what he could to portray as realistic an environment as he could. Same could be said for the likes of The China Syndrome and The Andromeda Strain. I still quite enjoy those movies, despite (or maybe because of) the old-school special effects. They were groundbreaking in their day, and I find that to be a good thing, not a detraction. And while Spartacus is a bit old-school, it was an incredible tour-de-force in it's raw scope of production in a time when there was no such thing as CGI. So yeah, Kubrick isn't the world's best, but I definitely rank him as one of the better directors. I don't fawn or drool over his work, but have huge respect for the good stuff he's put out.
Oh, and to put things into a bit of perspective, the other sci-fi at the time was generally along the lines of this: Not that a half-naked Jane Fonda floating around in fake zero g environments wasn't a kids wet dream, but it was still pretty trippy and campy. 2001 was one of the first of its kind.
For me, A Clockwork Orange is one of those rare instances where the film surpasses the book. The first time I saw this film was at an art house theatre in NYC, and it just assaulted every one of my senses.
Beyond the Law (1968), Lee VanCleef To say that this movie was confusing would be an understatement. Here's the plot: This group of three bandits rob a stagecoach of a silver mine's payroll, but for some reason they stick around in the mining town, and the leader is eventually made sheriff. Ok, are these guys good or bad? Right after the stagecoach is robbed (not with a stick-up; they somehow manage to sneak the cash box out in a way that was never fully explained) and they find out that the cash is missing, the courier responsible for the cash steals a horse at the mining village (no one tries to stop him) and rides off. While riding through the desert, he is found by Van Cleef, who for some reason has lost HIS horse (he clearly had his own horse in the opening of the movie, and it was never explained what happened to it). Then Van Cleef steals the horse from him, AND THEN GIVES THE COURIER A RIDE BACK TO THE MINING TOWN! And the courier was all pleasant about it too, like letting VanCleef take his (stolen) horse was his duty (who knows, maybe he felt guilty about taking it.). So anyway, after befriending the courier, the sheriff, and all the other townspeople, the 3 bandits decide to try covertly robbing the stagecoach again by acting as security on the way to and from the bank, but the second time they are attacked by a larger rival gang on the way back! They are unsuccesful, and while I wasn't keeping track, they suffered casualties so great that their whole squad should have been taken out. During the skirmish, the sheriff was shot and wounded, so they decide to make VanCleef the sheriff for the time being. The rival gang wants revenge, and they come into town and start pushing people around, and decide to steal the outgoing load of silver. Finally they hold this church full of women and children hostage, there is a big shootout that lasts about 20 minutes, and all the bad guys are dead. Then the other members of VanCleef's gang want to take off with the silver, but he decides that he wants to settle down and remain sheriff (they never say what ultimately happened to the old sheriff). His buddies won't have any of that, so he kills one of them, and the courier (who seems to have a crush on Van Cleef or something) shoots the other one, and everyone lives happily ever after. The continuity of this movie was all kinds of fucked up; there were some scenes where for NO REASON WHATSOEVER, everyone starts speaking Italian! Nobody spoke Italian before or after. I could understand if for whatever reason they were speaking spanish (this movie did take place in Texas presumably), but who the hell spoke Italian in the old west?! There are also scenes where the town will be absolutely packed with people, then the camera will change angles, and it's like a ghost town (you can't even hear the activity that was going on in the previous shot). Also, this movie is supposed to take place not long after the Civil war (one guy was still wearing a Union Army uniform), but in the sheriff's office, there is a map of the United States in their current configuration! (For anyone who doesn't know, most of the western states were just large territories at that time) Also, this movie was made before "squibs" were perfected, so when anyone gets shot, they scream, keel over and die, but you never see any damage, except for the very last scene when the courier kills Van Cleef's buddy; he has what is obviously red paint splattered all over him. Kind of funny really. The stunts for this movie were awesome though; those stuntmen really earned their keep. There were guys falling 10 or more feet and hitting the ground in ways that you would think would result in crippling injuries. Maybe they did end up in wheel chairs; this movie was made back before stuntmen were listed in the credits and were considered expendable.
I can not agree with this more. I have to add one comment to Sherwood's rant, this film is NOTHING like you would expect. The box and the choice is a big part of it, then it get's tied up in Aliens and sci-fi nonsense. I would watch "Never Back Down" on repeat for three straight days without sleeping before I watched this one time.