Put me down for duck-sized horses. I've been bitten by a duck-sized duck, and that shit hurts. With a 24" bill, that thing could take an arm.
One hundred horses is definitely enough for a stampede, and stampedes are scary no matter what animal is involved. On the flip side, big duck can FLY. And rip you apart with his beak. I guess it depends: are you more confident in your kicking game or your mount-and-rear-choke game? I think I'm showing up on gameday with boots and jeans and going against the many horses.
I'm going to go out on a limb and say this was your own goddamn fault.[/quote] The wi-fi card was a known recall issue. The screen cracking occurred while taking a train back home. Call it my fault if you like but I've taken other laptops since on various journeys and the screens haven't cracked. The hard drive failure I couldn't tell you; the computer stopped working one day and wouldn't keep working on restarting. Took it to the apple genius, she pulled out and reinserted the hard drive, no go. The funny thing is most people respond to this by saying "gee, macs aren't supposed to do that!". As if any computers were supposed to do that.
It would go down sorta like this. Especially the part in the end where I eat a gigantic roasted duck and get laid.
I hate instagram and 99% of the people that use it. So this is fucking hilarious. <a class="postlink" href="http://allthingsd.com/20121204/collegehumor-pokes-fun-at-your-terrible-instagram-shots/?mod=tw_soc" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;">http://allthingsd.com/20121204/collegeh ... mod=tw_soc</a> I just wish that everytime someone posted an instagram the response was "Thank You. Please Realize No One Thinks You're An Artist Or Gives A Fuck."
I co-sign ducks bite like a mofo, and will lacerate your skin like a Pacman frog. Fuck with a swan however, and you will remember it for the rest of you life. Then will pummell you with their wings like a Muay Thai warrior. One attacked my (on father's day of course) while we were golfing and fucked his shit up. I hit it with an iron, and it just looked at me as if to say "Bish, you fuckin' CLOWNIN' my ass?" Nasty, nasty animals. Admire them from a distance or you'll regret it.
New challenge. Would you rather fight a dragon that spits AIDS or Aretha Franklin's Tittays? R-E-S-P-E-C-T, sock it to me, sock it to me, sock it to me.
It has to be her. The only way to win is to motorboat those bad boys. Oh, and she hasn't bathed in 2 weeks, having also lived on a steady diet of canned sardines.
Likke diving into a half-inflated bouncing castle. You can just see the little tyke's hand desperately reach up from the void as he screams his last gasp for help in vain "MOOOMMMMMMIIEEEEEEeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!!"
Can I get a side dish of whatever that black skin thing is that super fat people with diabetes get between their fat rolls? TX you're a nurse, a little help with terminology?
I will not open that I will not open that I will not open that Okay, kids. Enough of this Narwhal vs. Jackalope debate. I have a straight-up discussion for you. It is this: ...ACTUALLY not a sex toy. This is called the GoGirl. It's so women can pee standing up. They say it's more sanitary than sitting on a public toilet. That part makes sense, but don't you have a piss-festooned rubber cone in your purse?
As someone who had to clean bathrooms before as part of my job, women don't have to worry about the sanitary conditions of public toilets because they never sit on them. They just piss all over them, throw toilet paper all around the floor and finish it off by throwing their garbage next to the garbage cans.