I fucked up my threads and posted an R&R Visualized post here, and then couldn't figure out how to delete it, so have a Rave instead. Spoilered for verbosity. Spoiler Weekend plans: Rave: a friend's girlfriend, bless her heart, is trying to throw a Singles party for me, my 2 male housemates, and her single friends. This is a lovely gesture and one I appreciate, but it is also the worst idea I've ever heard. Problem 1. Me and my housemates are somewhat nerdy, middle class, white collar guys. (think Senior Business Analyst, IT Desk Manager of a Bank, and Programmer / PhD student). Her friends are... rural. Decent people, but of the 'didn't finish high school, homos are unnatural, Muslims = terrorist, dey took our jerbs' variety. I'll have a beer and avoid discussing anything of substance with them, but they aren't really... dateable, per se. Problem 2. We are all somewhat acquired tastes. One of my housemates is a far nicer person than I am, but he has the same awareness of social norms as Mowgli. The other comes across as an incredibly nice guy, but man, he has issues with women. He makes me look well adjusted. And me? I always take the offensive joke over the play that will get me laid. (E.g. one of the girls that would be at this is the same girl that was sitting on my lap, explaining to me why it was ok for her last boyfriend to hit her if she made fun of him for not having sex with her. "Shit, judging from your past preferences, I don't think I'm violent or gay enough to keep hitting on you." Yeah, she's fucking someone else now. I'm smooth.) Problem 3. Consider the above 2 problems into the context of a 'Singles party'. There is already an air of desperation in the room. We can't talk about anything remotely controversial, because we are such polar opposites on the political/social justice spectrum. My housemates are good friends, and we have years of habit of riffing off each other when drunk. The only way this ends is with us getting way too drunk and making fun of the girls, who are good people and probably don't deserve the mockery of a bunch of computer nerds. The girls will think we are obnoxious dicks, because we are, and be pissed off at the person who thought organizing this would be a good idea. I will return home having successfully alienated a room full of people that in a better world I would have slept with, pissed off a friend that was only trying to help me, and shaking my head in amused disbelief at my ability to fuck up slam dunks. Y'know, in writing this post, I think I've talked myself into going.
Rave: Got approved for a place today!!! Ravier: It has a bathroom bigger than a matchbox!! Ravierer: I get my own room!! Okay, so I don't have a bed, chest of draws, anything for me to use in said own room but I get to chill our nude, masturbate, listen to music that everyone else in my house hates and scratch my arse in the privacy of my own room! Raviest: It has a kitchen!! Raviest x 2: It has a shrubbery. Woo!
Rave: lifted weights for the first time in 4 years yesterday Rave: had an amazing day-after-workout, morning dump today Rant: couldn't reach across and put my seatbelt on this morning Rave: gonna be looking boss for spring break 2014
Rave: Gonna have a few beers in front of a roaring fireplace tonight. Rant/Rave: The area I've camped in for years up in northern Minnesota (my avatar) is within the 100,000+ acres currently on fire. I'm really hoping the lodge at our entry point is fine. The fires are necessary and it's an isolated area so property damage should be minimal, but I know some buildings will burn.
Rave: Cool front. Crockpot slow cooking a pork shoulder marinated in marmalade, ginger, garlic and finely ground unicorn horn. Dinner is going to be fantastic...
RAVE: Tailor ham with fried tomatoes and pepper jack cheese on a toasted hoagie with mayo. I think I just ejaculated.
Rant: I've been doing my job for almost five years and have seen a lot of crazy shit in peoples homes. I've met a fucking tonne of crazies, of every spectrum, I guess it's time I met Chester the Molester. Fixing this dudes phone line; get to his home and it's working. Went to shake his hand goodbye, as a general courtesy, and he reaches out and grabs my package. I look him in the eye, say no, and walk out the fucking door. I call my boss, what does she say? I'll write this up and mark his account down with sexual predator; at least none of the other guys will have to deal with this asshat. Who the fuck grabs someones nuts, someone that you've never met, out of the blue like that? Apparently this guy. I've got no problems with gay guys, hell, I have a few gay friends but this dude needs some help. I haven't been this angry in a long time; fuck it, I'm done working for the day, I'll be okay, I just need to rant a bit.
RAVE: This is the best news headline ever. Gordon Ramsay's dwarf porn double Percy Foster dies in badger den
RAVE: Got a call this morning from a guy who just dropped $250k on a new Porsche race car here in town. He needed the data shit set up and Porsche recommended he call me. I just finished setting up his Motec and ECU for SCCA racing, so it was a fun morning. Then he slipped me a grand as thanks. I was doing it for free just to introduce him to our local scene. It's a good day!
Rant: Getting OC sprayed is easily the most painful worst thing I've ever done in my life. Rave: Passed and survived.
Rave: Who has two thumbs and just passed their engineering Professional Practice Exam?! This kid! Woot! Now my name can officially be written: [Dcc001], B.Mgt., C.E.T. It makes me feel like all those years of education and student member classification have paid off. And are now over. Is it wrong that I still kick around the idea of a PhD? Hmm...
Rant: Thanks to landing a new job, I have moved from Cincinnati. I was in the middle of my year-long lease at my place in Cincinnati, so I had to organize showings to potential new tenants with hopes that they would sign a lease of their own. The first person, a girl I graduated high school with, saw it, like it, applied and was approved two weeks ago. "Yeah, I'll definitely sign a lease." That was two weeks ago and she texted me today, saying that she wouldn't be able to sign. Fuck. I've already paid two rents for September. If I have to pay two rents for October, my checking account is going to be cut to the bone. Rave: I really like my new job so far. The new coworkers are going above and beyond to make me feel welcome and I'm inspired to do well. They're sort of making me build the plane while I fly it instead of easing me in with training, etc. but that's just fine with me.
Rant: Mr. P just caught me dancing in the bathroom to no music. It was something of a high Riverdance action and he won't stop making fun of me. Rave: He can't Riverdance without going back in time. I win.
Big Bald-headed White Guy Rave: Find out what flavor of kid we are getting this afternoon. Rant/Rave:Start setting the nursery up this weekend.
Rave: Had the final ultrasound yesterday, and the baby girl is just perfect. She's got a full head of hair and you can even see eyelashes in the pic. Four weeks left and I am equally stoked and terrified for this.
Rave: Leaving for Vegas shortly. Additional related rave: For a bachelor party. Ultra Rave: I don't have anything to rant about, until maybe the flight home on sunday. If I had to guess I'm going to be in hell come sunday but until then wooohooo!
Rant: Getting an IUD placed is easily one of the most painful things I've done to myself. The things women put up with to avoid babies...
Rave: I just realized today wasn't Friday. Rave: Living your Thursday like it's a Friday is fantastic.
Rave: My uncle is out of the hospital and is recovering at home. Rave: There's a chance I can drive down there in October.