Rant: Need to change the time I go to sleep 10 hours forward by Monday. Rave: I'm going to spend the next 7 hours playing video games to help accomplish this goal.
[RANT] Stove bit the dust on Thursday night (electrical malfunction) and the new one can't be delivered until Monday night. No problem, I have the BBQ. [RAVE] Stove is full warranty replacement and they don't have that model, so I'm getting a top of the line one! [RANT] BBQ caught on fire last night. A seal failed or some such shit. All I know is I closed the lid and as I went to walk away, I notice a small fire where the plastic coupler attaches to the propane tank. I put the fire out, but the coupler is completely melted and fused to the tank. My friend suggests that I smash the melted coupler off of the full propane tank with a hammer. Erm ... no. I'm not replacing it, or even fixing it as I've been saving up for a Nat.Gas one and [RAVE] I'm almost there! [RANT] I'm supposed to be making a 'nice' dinner tonight. I have a microwave and an electric fry pan. So I'm putting on my thinking cap. Clearly the plan I had for the quail that is sitting prepped and marinating in my fridge awaiting grill time isn't in the cards.
Rave Last night the better half and I went out for a nice meal followed by a few drinks back home. This was all topped off with great sex. Rant The weekends don't come around fast enough.
Rant: Just found out my uncle got into a really bad bike accident the other day (bicycle not motorcycle). He was riding his bike and a tree broke and crashed right in front of him. He said that he heard the tree crack and then it was in front of him it happened so fast. His neck was already fucked up from a car accident he had 15 or so years ago so it got screwed up worse. He's going to be in a brace again for a while and he's going to have plastic surgery on his face (which is what he landed on). He broke his nose and dislocated a few of his fingers in multiple places. He said one of them looked like the letter Z. I talked to him on the phone so thankfully he's relatively alright but he's pretty fucked up.
Rave: New hockey stick, top of the line model for only $150. Great bargin. Rant: Flat broke until Thursday and Landlords insurance is $960 this year the scamming fuckheads. Rant: Got hit in the back of thehead this morning with a hockey ball. 17 years playing and this is the first time I've been hit in the head. Massive fuck off lump the size of a hockey ball. Rave: Still played ok although watching the rest of the team play today was like watching someone try to get a jar open with hands covered in oil.
Rave: I'm stoked to be gaining more weight. Rave: Went on an awesome mtn. bike ride- despite the wind trying to murder me! Rant: Why can't people stay on one side or the other of a trail that everyone knows people ride bike's on!? Don't walk right down the middle or I'll run your ass over next time, dummy!
Rant: Tailgating assholes. Look, cock jockey, I'm doing 75 in a 65 and actively passing someone. I don't give a shit that you want to do 90. Fuck off. Rave: Boxing in said tailgater next to a U-Haul and slowing down to 60 mph. I swear, I could see the rising blood pressure actually taking minutes off his life.
Rave: Just discovered The Oatmeal and I'm howling with laughter. Does the Internet have any other really funny or cool stuff on it that everyone else knows about but I don't? Rant: I think our cat is dying. Lost a ton of weight and has a distended belly. Bloodwork due back from vet on Tuesday. ugh.
Rant: Needed a place to try to write out my thoughts, spoilered because it probably sounds whiny. Spoiler Past month and a half or so I've been in a weird mental state. It's mostly based around thoughts of what the purpose of life is and what my goals should be, and how none of it really matters when we die. I recently graduated college and started a good job but I've just been incredibly confused about what I want. It's hard to explain without using very cliche or cheesy statements but about five nights a week it takes over my thoughts for about a half hour or so before bed. Part of it has to do with worrying about taking the wrong path because my job is more of something I fell into rather than something I had a passion for. I feel like I'm going to wake up at 50 and look back and feel like I just wasted about thirty years and have nothing to show for it. I look back on the last few years and I have that feeling but I don't know what to change so that I don't continue down the same path.
Rant: hard week Spoiler Talked with the ex via Skype on Thursday. She's on the other side of the country and I won't see her for a year, and it's getting to me more than I would like to admit. I fucking hate that my weak parents couldn't solve their own issues with their incapacity to express how they feel and that I did the same thing they did to me to my ex. I can't forgive myself for that. I found the one girl who made me happier than anyone else ever came close to, and lost her because I couldn't figure myself out in time. She just gave meaning to everything I did, and other women simply don't compare to her. Rave: My BJJ is improving. An athletic guy with at least 30lbs of muscle on me and a few amateur MMA fights under his belt came to the gym last week and I toyed with him, even though I was exhausted. It's hard to explain what that sport does to me. I'm a much stronger and confident man than ever, and constantly challenging myself in the gym helped so much in getting there. Rant: I move so much during the summer I'm having a very hard time keeping weight on. Rave: Look at this video at 0:36. My juggling with regular balls is getting better, I will try to move on to bowling pins in a few weeks and someday... I might get to knives. I bet chicks would dig it. Spoiler
Rant/Rave: I just got back from a fundraiser for the remaining family of a victim of the Century Sixteen shooting. While the circumstances are awful, the community rallying and raising over $5 grand for the widow is heartwarming. Plus, beer.
RANT: Ran a big catering out to BFE last night. Missed a turn, went too far and got caught doing 45 in a 35 by a fucking hick cop whose face made me look like a Proactiv spokesman. $185 ticket. That's half of what I was about to put into savings.
RANT: Spoilered for overly pensive thoughts Spoiler Just had a really fun weekend, but still found myself feeling like it was more or less worthless. Its summer, which has always been my worst time with women for whatever reason. Thus attractive women prancing around half naked only seem to exacerbate it. But its not even about random skanks, I'm over it. I'm even more over meeting girls I have no interest in dating. I remember the days when girls had no interest in me and now plenty of girls are interested, but I have no interest in any of them. When I ended my last relationship and told myself I wasn't going to settle the next time, I wasn't expecting a drought like this. Evidently I'm looking in all the wrong places. I dont even know anymore. Then my professional life isn't quite a mess, but its just as confusing. I know I want to leave my job, but I don't know any idea of where I want to go. After wanting to do something for most of college/post-college and life throwing a curveball, I never really thought about it a different way. And its weird. So I'm sure it will all turn out, but I find myself stressed and morose but with no directly tangible reasons why. RAVE: Dealing with all these heavy thoughts while looking at this view out my family room makes it a bit better...