Rant: I enjoy having a glass of milk with my breakfast. As an added bonus, milk is good for me. So why does milk have to give me horrible gas?!?! Everyone I work with is extremely thankful right now that I have my own office, even if they don't know it.
RANT: Why is my Facebook feed full of people that are all "WAAAHHH, GUNS KILL, AND THIS SHOOTING SHOWS WHY WE NEED BETTER LAWS" and "BAAAHHH, GUNS DON'T KILL PEOPLE, PEOPLE KILL PEOPLE!" Seriously? Shut the fuck up. Today's not the fucking day for a gun control discussion. RAVE: I had this conversation today and it was glorious - "Are you Naughty Probie's PO?" "Yes." "He was given a bond on the new case, and they won't release him until you take the hold off of him. So, can you?" "No." "No?" "No." "Why not?" "Because he's in jail for new Armed Robbery charges." "But he hasn't gone on trial yet." "And to get the hold lifted would mean I'd have to dismiss the warrant. No judge in this circuit will dismiss a violation of probation warrant with new Armed Robbery charges pending when he's currently on probation for Armed Robbery! Plus, if he's released, robs and kills someone, my name will not be attached to that when it's all over the news. So, absolutely not, I will not release the hold." "But there were no witnesses to the robberies." "That's a court thing. Not a probation thing." She asked to speak to my supervisor and chief. Both said the same thing - "Fuck no." I'm paraphrasing, but that's pretty much what I know they wanted to say. It's a rave because it produced a good laugh on such a shit day.
BLARGH: Long day at work followed by reading about horrible shit followed by a phone call saying grandma told her doctor "Fuck it I'm done with this sorry-assed see-saw bullshit, make me fucking comfortable so I can die"* and has six months. * My grandmother being a religiously devout woman, this is very slightly paraphrased. They've been changing her meds back and forth because the ones that keep water from pooling around her lungs are also putting her kidneys in danger of failure. Or something. Her treatment regimen is so fluid and complex I don't even know how her doctor keeps his sanity intact. Basically, she's accepting impending kidney failure in exchange for not gaining ten pounds of water and being unable to breathe. Also there are a lot of really, really cute chicks at new job. Several I'd like to hang out with, and one I really, really want to go scootah on. Like, I'm having fantasies about her being the kind of girl that I could spank until I'm ready to pass out from exhaustion and she'd sticking her ass out asking me if I was ready to start yet. Also, rant: Fuck the metal recycling industry and every last person in it. Those cheating pricks make ex-lawyer used car salesman look like saints.** ** Actual saints, not the members of the football team that think you win football games by getting repeatedly penalized for being fucking idiots.
Rave: A coworker got drunk at the Christmas party and grabbed the ass of the senior developer's girlfriend and then told one of the interns that he wants to "abuse her" sexually. I'm so excited for Monday morning.
RANT: Newtown, CT (the scene of the school shooting yesterday) is my hometown. While I didn't know anyone personally who was killed in this tragedy, it still hurts that this happened and that the safety and security I once felt in and about my town is now destroyed. I will be praying for a long time for the lives lost in this tragic event.
Rave: For good or for ill this fuck of a semester is over. Rave: I know for a fact I have two As. Rant: I'm really worried about one of my classes. Rave: It is not a class I need in any way shape or form.
Rant: friggin flu shot. I feel terrible and probably didn't even get it early enough to be effective against family members next week.
Rave: My orientation and first day at the big cat center went great. It'll be a lot of work and a lot to remember but it'll beat sitting around Saturday nursing a hangover and watching shitty TV. I stayed after orientation for something called "enrichment", which is basically giving each cat something it really likes. Some have very specific likes, such as: *Leopard and coffee grounds * cinnamon. This is like catnip to this leopard. Catnip that makes him drool. *Tiger and Obsession for Men. Same as cinnamon with the aforementioned leopard. *Lion likes pumpkin spice latte. And will roar in your face if you stop giving it to him. Also got to pet two tigers, a lioness and a very old mountain lion. Rant: After spending a good bit of time inside the enclosure with the tigress that hates my ass, she still hates my ass. Rant: The people who have a lot of these critters before the center gets them are some of the lowest sack suckers on the face of the Earth. Who pulls a tiger cub's claws out with pliers and no anesthesia? Or a puma kitten's teeth?
RAVE: Two nights, two different girls, both filled with oh so much sex. RANT: No motivation to do much of anything at work. I'm behind and have no desire to buckle down and get back in it. RAVE: Just got to get through Thursday and then I'm off till Jan 2nd.
Rave: Went out to dinner with the wife, and my best friend's brother and fiancee last night. It was great to catch up with him, and he's moving here from Vermont soon, so I'll have another person to hang out with! Rave: Germany for almost two weeks on Friday! I am on complete autopilot from now until then. Rave: Germany means eating Döner, drinking Glühwein, and eating crepes at the Christmas markets! Rant: We have to see my father in law and my wife's stepmother. She is a bitch and has zero redeemable qualities. Rave: Only have to see them for one of the days we're there.
Rave: I had an appointment with a dermatologist today to check out three spots on my skin. I'm fair, blonde, green-eyed and had a couple of bad sunburns as a kid, so I'm basically the perfect candidate for skin cancer. After searching the internet (seriously, who needs a medical degree now that Google exists--it answers EVERYTHING!), I self-diagnosed the spot on my back as Stage III melanoma. Well, the dry patch on my face was pre-cancerous and the other two spots were actinic keratosis, which they don't do anything with since it's considered cosmetic. However, I complained the one on my back is irritated by my bra strap (not really but I wanted it removed because it freaked me out) and they liquid nitrogen-ed it. As well as my face. It burns! So Christmas pictures will be awesome this year. My husband said good thing photoshop exists. Anyway, rave for it not being cancer! Rant: My daughter "borrowed" my yoga pants about two weeks ago. I have a feeling they are now her yoga pants.
Weird: I've started receiving calls (2 so far in the past week) from an army recruiting office over an hour away from where I live. Apparently 23 year old female social work students are their new target demographic?
RANT: Friends brother died in a house fire yesterday. I've fallen out of touch with this friend but we were best friends going up so I knew his brother decently well. This guy was just an awesome person, he was an amazing hockey player and coach and just an all around good person. It's such a shame that he died so young (he was only 31). I can't imagine what my friend is going through. Fucking fuck fuck, I wish I could change things.
Rave: Pushed through an annoying plateau on my overhead press tonight. Feels great to make progress. Rant: The tweak to my neck that's been bothering me for the past week is really flaring up right now; dammit I hope that percocet kicks in soon. Even though I saw my doctor about it and am not in danger of injuring my neck/shoulder by lifting it still fucking hurts like a motherfucker right now.
RAVE: Not suffering from CO poisoning. RAVE: Girlfriend not dead from CO poisoning. Rant: Cost at least $150 for me from my insurance, not sure whether that covers my initial time at my non-plan hospital. RANT: No idea what this will end up costing my uninsured girlfriend. RAVE: Girlfriend now more willing to go adventuring. Rant: I left the Terry Pratchett book I was reading in the house to blame for the above rants, won't be in the area to pick it up again until Saturday. Discworld fans probably would understand this irritation.
Rant: Percocet was worthless; I got zero sleep last night. What's the next step up in painkiller strength?