Rave: Birthday sex. Rave: My girlfriend is taking me to one of my favorite restaurants tonight and then we're gonna celebrate some more... in my bed.
Rave: Saw Adam Richman at the Scarborough Renaissance fair in Waxahachie, TX, last Saturday, filming for his new show.
RANT: Went out in the field tonight with one of the sex offender officers. A grossly overweight kiddie toucher came to the door topless. Think Fat Bastard. It was hideous to behold. My coworker made it worse by telling me a few years ago she went there, asked to talk to his wife and the wife yelled out "Wait, let me put some clothes on," before she came outside. Think Fat Bastard as a female. At least she was clothed, but seriously...What. The. Fuck.
Rant: Suspect I helped process last week is now claiming to have TB. Said individual threw up multiple times within 5 feet of me. Weak.
Rave: Coworker: "Audrey, I'm sorry, but I am completely transfixed by your ass whenever you walk in front of me. How are you doing that?" Answer: I live life as if a Beyonce song is playing and also my shoes were giving me blisters and I was compensating for the hobbling with extra swish.
Rave: Boredom cured. We have one the tin foil hat people amongst the jury. Listening to her conspiracy theories, while in recess, is awesome.
Rant: It could have been worse. My jury duty this week had me in the jury for a 23-year-old murder/rape case of an elderly woman. Two words that made it horrible: autopsy photos. Specifically, photos to prove the rape occurred. This is a link to the case: http://www.orlandosentinel.com/news...urder-guilty-osceola-20130423,0,5341569.story
Rave: Jägerette has a job interview tomorrow, she was the first call they made once the period ended. Ravier: It pays enough that we can save up for a down payment on a place in only a few months.
Rant: GHD situps and demonstrating Good Mornings all day have left my ass, hamstring, and core feeling like I've been attacked with a meat tenderizer. Rave: I'm gonna squat today.
Rant- The flip phone finally death rattled. Had to renew my contract. But... Rave- Wound up with an iPhone 5, $100 off the purchase price in addition to the renewal discount, and 10% off of my bill for the foreseeable future. I can see myself getting used to a smartphone. Rave- Remembered that I had a $50 REI gift card and REI carries lifeproof cases. Part of my reluctance to move forward with technology was my affinity for water and the foregone conclusion that whatever I get is going to wind up wet. This solves the problem for $40 out of pocket. I can live wit that. Rant- FedEx smartpost. So, let me get this straight... One of the world's largest and most successful companies, with a massive, efficient, trustworthy infrastructure put together a program where 75% of the task is completed internally and the remainder, the part where the product actually winds up in the hands of the consumer, is farmed out to the post office? The fucking post office? If I want to use shitty delivery service, I'll shop on ebay. Seriously, fuck that.
RANT: Another fuck you to Fedex. I was supposed to have a computer delivered yesterday. Was at home waiting. I heard no knock or the door bell, which is loud as fuck. I just so happened to go outside to get the paper and on the door was a nice little door tag. I didn't waive signature as I wasn't sure if I'd be home. I called and they said they'd have their driver come back. Never did. Fast forward to today. I am waiting this time with windows open and actually sitting and working with line of site of any truck pulling up. I see it pull up. In the time it took me to take off running downstairs and open the door, they had already put a new tag on the door and were walking away. Seriously!!!! I called them back and asked if they even knocked or rang the door bell. They were shocked and tried to claim they've been there for a bit and rang 2 times. BULL FUCKING SHIT!!! I was running downstairs and the vehicle wasn't even there for a minute. I know you have lots of packages to deliver but hell, do your fucking job and at least give people a second to get to the god damn door. If you're a Fed Ex delivery person....Fuck you! We're all busy. And how efficient is it to have to make two trips for one package.
Rant: It's 51 degrees in my apartment right now. Rave: The radiators are back on. I will be hiding out in bed under 100 blankets until it's a livable temperature in here again.
Rant Got into a really depressed mood today...wow, fuck this. Things are even feeling like their going better for me than usual and somehow I just slip into this state. Doing something wrong I guess.
Rave! New toy! And a perfect toy it is: A jacked up Durango 4x4. It's symbolizes everything other countries hate about the US...it's big, loud, obnoxious, and gets 12mpg. I now leave a Sasquatch sized carbon foot print and can pull a fucking battleship in 4 low if I feel like it. The best thing is that it makes hippies sad and I'm all for pissing off hippies. Rant: I'm in the middle of the God damn desert, not a mud hole in sight. I will be remedying that shortly.
Rave: Anzac Day was awesome. Rant: Completely broken today, so tired. Rave: Tool tomorrow night. Rave: Red Wings are winning.
RAVE: I was told to expect my job offer by wednesday. This means I'll have a part time will full benefits and $16 an hour. Extra Rave: Picked up two other part time jobs from friends for 10 an hour, doing easy office work 2 days a week. So between the three jobs, I'll be working full time, mostly from home and have insurance.
Rave: Lost a good bit of weight this past fall but couldn't get motivated to start back up and lose the rest after Christmas. Joining dietbet is keeping me excited and interested, plus I'll win some monies as a real reward for my efforts.