Rant: I got zapped by a lightswitch last night. My roommate/landlord and his friend were doing some electrical work in the kitchen last weekend and apparently missed something. I'm so glad I got to make that discovery. Rave: Got the past two days off work because power to the office was cut. One of the best feelings in the world is waking up feeling like shit, not wanting to work, and getting a text from your boss saying "Stay home." Miracles happen!
RANT: I'm ok with people not being familiar with the finer point of lane swimming etiquette. Different people do things a bit differently, we all mess up here and there, whatever - that's cool. But I honestly can't understand some people's thought process, and am blown away by how oblivious they are to the fact that they're fucking up everyone else's swim. There are six lanes, two clearly marked (with a giant sign) "SLOW," two "MEDIUM," and two "FAST." Reasons not to swim in the fast lane (that apparently don't go without saying): -The people next to you in the medium lane are noticeably faster than you. -Your only stroke appears to be a cross between breaststroke and a farm animal having a seizure. -You don't own goggles and clearly have no intention of getting your hair wet. And by all means, once you finish your two minute dogshit lap, just stand right in the middle of the lane by the wall so the other swimmers can't do their turns. It's exactly like people who go to the gym and spend five minutes sitting on a bench while they text and casually sip their protein shake, or the classic bicep curls in the squat rack. Someone walking in to a gym/pool/whatever for the first time in their life should be able to recognize that these things are not ok. *One exception was the time a girl who had, I assume, sold her soul to the devil in return for her ass decided to join the fast lane. Just an awful swimmer, but it was a privilege and an honour to be stuck behind that thing.
Rant Almost dropped a fridge on my head, that would've sucked. I was moving a fridge so the floors could be redone in the kitchen and we had to move it down some steps to get it outside in the garage. I had the bright idea of using a plywood ramp and a dolly to do this. Dolly good, plywood ramp bad. I also decided I would walk it down the steps backwards, bad. As I was moving it down the steps the plywood slipped out and I slammed to the ground and so did the fridge. Fortunately I fell backwards and out, and the fridge didn't roll that much. Didn't scare me too much at the time because I was more pissed I dropped the fridge, but in hindsight, yea. But hey, fridges only weigh a shit ton so whats the worst that could've happened.
Rave: At the new unit and it seems a good bunch of guys. Rant: Living on base until i can find a place in town.
Big Rave: Spoilered for being kinda long. Spoiler So for those of you who remembered, I accepted an offer to a ridiculously great job back in April. For reasons that I can't get into due to a serious NDA, that job, along with the jobs of a few others, went away like a fart in the fucking wind. It was sudden, unexpected, incredibly harsh, and not based on merit or performance in any way. It. Sucked. But not to be knocked down, the group of us came together and have made something amazing. This morning, I found out that all the deals have been finalized and that in the next week or so, I will have a paid job again--a fantastic job that's actually much better than the one that was ripped away from me. I'm sitting on cloud nine right now. I'm now the COO of a kick ass restaurant group, which makes the last two scary, stressful months so worth it. God, I feel good right now.
Rave: Promoted to VP, the youngest in the entire firm. Rave^10: Better comp package than I even considered. Rant: Doesnt take effect until September, for some reason. (Not one-upping EffinS's post above, just coincidental timing).
Rave: One of my wifes friends(i am friends with the husband, dont particulary care for the wife) is having a birthday party of her kids first birthday. I bought a toy called "catch me kitty" http://www.toysrus.ca/product/index.jsp?productId=11622718, it has numbers and shapes buttons to help the kid learn those. It's primary function is to move to help the kid learn to walk. The funny part? They have a cat, yes i am try teaching there kid to chase there cat around.
Rave: Salary adjustments. Rave: Hosting house parties Rave: Finding all your SNL jeopardy episodes on an old hard drive Rave: Summer Rant: This place is dying, and I haven't contributed to keeping the community afloat
RANT: Being woken up at 7.15am by your upstairs neighbour who is seemingly rolling bowling balls or possibly cannon balls around on his floor. Anyone who lives in an apartment building above the ground floor who then puts down tiles as their flooring of choice is an inconsiderate cunt who deserves to be shot in the face. Fuck you.
Rant: There is no worse time to have to poop than at a bar near closing time. And there is no worse feeling than having someone catch you wiping while standing up and making 2 seconds of bizarre eye contact while wiping standing up. I mean, you know... probably....
Rave: Had a good night at the poker table yesterday. After a fairly disastrous start (playing poorly + running poorly = bad combination), I finally hit a nice little cache of cards. Instantly improved my play, and I avoided all of the big stack pitfalls that I usually run into. Rave: Randomly bought a used PS3. About to set it up. Since I did no research, I have no idea if I bought the one I should have. Doubt it really matters. Any games I should get?
Rave. The frebis is now a married man. Celebrated my love for my lady by marrying her on the volleyball court at the bar across the street from my house. Then there was a flash flood, half of the guests' cars were submerged, and the reception turned into everyone sliding in the grass on a makeshift slip and slide. Best day ever. No rants!
Rant: Home ownership. The goddamned P trap under the kitchen sink broke and I spent my Sunday afternoon dealing with it. Did I mention the inside of my house was hovering around 90 today? I took a cold shower and my balls actually hung lower.
Rave: The sales department is doing our quarterly team meeting today- on a pontoon on the Saint Croix river. The forecast is perfect and the beer will be cold. We have been kicking ass this year so it will be more of a celebration than a meeting. More meetings should be like this.
Rant Hungover as shit today. I was at a bbq yesterday and I started off by drinking stone IPA. I had a few of those then decided that I wanted to try and avoid a hangover so I started drinking bud light. I thought this was a decent idea, obviously I'm stupid. My head is pounding, I want to vomit and have diarrhea, and of course a I slept like shit. Work has been super so far.
Rant: Lie and come out $5k up or be honest and struggle to stay afloat financially. Can't decide which will ultimately be worse.
Rant Stop saying that your latest horror movie is "based on a true story." None of them are. We suspend disbelief to enjoy horror movies because ghosts and monster aren't real. You want to scare people? Try making an actual scary movie for a change.
Rave: Went to dinner last week with my friend/mentor/college advisor. I haven't seen him in a 6 or 7 years, and it was great to catch up. He is the man, other than my father, who has had the greatest influence on me, and is truly a role model. From working with wounded veterans, to guiding young minds in science, to serving as a governor's appointee on a public council, to his appearance in TIME magazine in defense of civil liberties, to being a friend - he is truly a man to pattern one's life after. I finally took the opportunity to tell him how much I appreciated all he has done for me. We left it at a future baseball game and beer in the not too distant future. Rant: My Uncle is dying. It's sad to see a good man have to suffer.
Rave: Met boyfriend's family this weekend. They like me. His daughters like me. Just hoping my family likes him, too... Rant: Stupidly shared my good mood with my ex's mom, whom I've stayed close to since her son and I split more than a year ago. She tried to rain on my parade hardcore. Yes, I know paramedics don't make a fortune. Yes, I know teenage girls are difficult and his older daughter may be a pain in the ass in the coming years, if we even get that far. No, I am not trying to marry him tomorrow. Your "realism" is not appreciated.
Rant: God fucking damn it all to hell. I've worked for this company for a year, without so much as a sick day or a single missed class. Now, when it's time for a second year contract they say "We'll give you the same contract, but not a better one." Fuck a stump. Rave: Gym at night, better scenery and working out in Vibrams is seriously life-altering.