Rant: It would appear lunch yesterday didn't agree with me and I've been channeling Wildered's bowels. Spent the night either on the toilet or praying in front of it. AT least work sent me home for two days.
Rant I may have to consider hanging up the pads. I keep getting concussions playing goalie, and while they've all been mild, I'm getting them from really ordinary shots that really shouldn't be causing me to get my bell rung. Its kind of concerning. I've been in net for ~20 years now and its a big part of who I am, it would suck to say goodbye to that. Granted I'll still coach and skate out, but 28 is just too young to hangup the pads because of concussions.
Rave: I just had a long talk with the would-be boss for a new marketing manager position being created here and it sounds like a really, really good fit for me. He was hoping I'd inquire too. I need to seriously think about the long term between sales and marketing positions here but so far, I can't completely convince myself that I can do this sales position for a really long time unless some things change. I've got the talent for sales but don't love it. Rant: Still in need of roommates. I've got some good prospects but nothing solid yet. No camping next week because of this too. Rave: My girlfriend is awesome. Rave/Rant: I can still run a 5k on command, but not without my legs protesting the next day (and the day after that). Maybe I should prepare a little more next time.
Rant: There can't be anything I instantly regret doing more than pissing at a urinal while wearing shorts. Like opening a can of Coke right before bedtime, you don't really think about what you're doing until it's just late enough to not stop. I could just pour that soda down the drain, get a glass of water and get to sleep at a reasonable hour. But I've already taken a sip of it, and throwing out a 93% full can of soda is wasteful. I could stop peeing and penguin-walk to the toilet with my dick in my hand in our single occupancy men's room. But I've already misted my legs with lukewarm filth. What's another 15 seconds? It isn't like I haven't had the same "I wonder if I have any open sores on my legs" train of thought before today. Every day at some point in the afternoon, I stumble into the men's room, nearly blind in panic. The diet Coke I've been drinking all day is treating my bladder like an enraged bull treats the starting pen at a rodeo. All I care about is breaking my personal record of "Zipper down, dick out." As I feel the wave of relief wash over me, I feel a slap in the face in the form of splashback. EVERY FUCKING TIME.
Rave: unlike Jimmy and Wee Funball, I can use the toilet without difficulty. Rant: my new boss has rapey eyes. Edit. New rant: per a rep, Puffman thinks I'm Korean.
Rave: My boss went golfing this morning, came in at noon and told me to "not worry about the stupid financials". We then went on a two hour lunch.
Rant: Today is one of those days. Maybe I didn't get enough sleep. Maybe between my hyper sensitivity to caffeine and my super dose of it yesterday, I am all wonky now. I don't know what it is but I am in the most unenthusiastic, low key, non amused mood today. I can't even pretend to be cheery.
Rave recently reconnected with a female friend of mine from high school, my wife really likes her as well, she was in my office Wednesday and we had a great conversation about life and her daughter and the business we are in, a lot of our conversation was how proud she was of her daughter going to college and growing up to be a productive member of society. Rant Got a text from her yesterday that her daughter was one of the students that had been shot in Seattle and she was getting on a plane to go to the Seattle. She took a shotgun blast at fairly close range that got her in chest and arm. I just don't get what the fuck is the matter with people, why does it seem right to them to go blast a bunch of random people I really just don't get it. Rave She had 5 hours of surgery last night and this morning but is now mildly awake and knows her mom is there, thank God for trauma surgeons. Thankfully dumb fuck shooter had a shot gun and not a rifle and was not very proficient at killing people.
My crepe myrtles and azaleas ( not to mention the chi chi camelias) are looking fucking delightful! ... I'll take "statements I previously couldn't imagine myself saying in 1,000 years" for $500, Alex.
Rant: Fuzzy buttholes. Fuck, they are the absolute worst when you're not used to them. My common law wife gets waxed along with 97% of the other women in the LS so I`ve grown used to a hairless sphincter. Last night a couple came over for a play date, she shaved her box but her dumper was like a jungle. I almost couldn't do it and I certainly didn't cum. PSA: Women we appreciate you trimming the front yard but please don`t forget about the back when the hedge clippers come out.
Rave: I got to meet David Sedaris after one of his shows and he signed a book for me with a drawing of a knife for some reason Rant: I said absolutely nothing clever and generally acted like a spaz in front of David Sedaris. It happened 4 days ago and I'm still embarrassed for myself.
Rave? Going out for a drink with a "friend" from high school. I haven't seen her in 20 years but we've talked on the phone some and texted. She's also sent me dirty pics. We hadn't talked in about a year but she texted me today to let me know she's in town. We'll see what happens.
Rant: A night with so many good possibilities ended up in truck loads of drama and women way too drunk to anything but cry and sulk.
Rave: I just got home from seeing her. We had a nice time and chatted (mostly she did, I'm not a big talker) and I walked her to her car. We just chatted for a while and then we hugged to say goodbye. She kissed me and I kissed her back and we made out in the parking lot for a while. None of this is so exciting except I couldn't stop thinking I made out with this woman over 20 years ago. I actually got farther back then. But we were in a parking lot. Am I the only one who's experienced something like this?
Rant: Can't sleep. I know it's because the meet I'm running is fast approaching and deadlines are coming due, and every time I take care of one problem, another crops up. I haven't even got to the point where I get to worry about the weather since it's an outdoor meet. Rave: Dave signed up to officiate. Why a rave for a guy I dislike so much? Because the head referee caught him cheating last year and says he won't let him on deck. I may have told Karl to make sure I'm around when he does that so I can pull up a chair and watch. Possibly video. I just want to savor it is all. In all seriousness, if this happens, it won't be pretty. And Karl is hardcore.
RANT: Piece of shit buyers of my home just backed out. We already extended them over a month due to snags in them getting their loan finalized due to them being worthless buyers going through USDA and the wife getting a FUCKING NEW JOB IN THE MIDDLE OF THE PROCESS!!! So, I've got a nice new apartment two states away, was ready to start looking to buy a new house in our new location because our financing is in order because we actually have our shit together. Now it looks like this apartment will be mine for longer and at the short term rate. FUCK!!! Plus we have to carry our mortgage until we can get it back active on the market and eventually get a new buyer and deal with their closing timeline. There is a hail mary play that I am hoping happens tomorrow, or I guess later today, that might save this deal. If not, we at least get all their earnest money to help us not be completely fucked for a month or two. Also, you should not have used our address to do things like enroll your kids in school before you owned the place so you could get a better school assignment for your kids and you won't end up with your last choice since it is late. You don't have the house. That's also highly illegal and potentially punishable. My wife is a teacher in the system and is about to make a couple phone calls on Monday if the deal truly is blown up. "I just want to inform you that we received letters in the mail that our address is being used to enroll Kid A and Kid B into your school. They don't live here and have never lived at this address." Best case is they get booted from the system and have to start then enrollment process all over again with whatever address they end up with. Worst case is the mom gets arrested and charged with a misdemeanor which very well could happen as false enrollment is highly frowned upon. I doubt they'll do anything but boot them and make them re-enroll with their new, real address, but it will be a little bit of small, petty vengeance for fucking us. Asshole move on our part? Probably. I'm scared about what is going to happen to us now and don't really care about them. My wife is a teacher and just got her last paycheck until her new job starts at the end of August. Having two large payments now is going to be rough along with our storage fees. We only moved forward due to the all clear from their fucking lender and all involved. Fuck! Thankfully we haven't bought a new home and are only renting. I am sure this family is suffering due to this as well, but fuck them. I'm too angry to be sympathetic anymore. Die in a fucking fire! Only consolation is that they literally spent every dime getting to this point as they had to do 100% financing, hence the USDA loan. They spent a lot of money on the inspection, testing, surveying, etc. and the earnest money and will lose it all. Good luck assholes. You're frustrated with your lender so you don't want to deal with it anymore. So are we but we've stayed the course after being told time and time again that it's all fine. Hell, I've been speaking with your lender more than you have. We've been patient and have offered ways to fucking help numerous times as blowing up the deal is worse than continuing to move forward. God damn it. We should have killed the deal a month ago so we could have been at least been back on the market for longer in the spring. I can't fucking sleep now and have no idea what the hell we are going to do. The area we are moving already has limited supply of homes for us to buy and this has killed our ability to move forward for at least 2-3 months. If we don't end up selling our home we are royally fucked as we both have jobs two states away.
Rave: Going to UFC 174 next weekend! Rant: I don't follow MMA as closely as I used to, but this seems like a really weak PPV card. The fights could still be amazing, and I hope they are, but it sucks that I won't see any of the really big name guys in person. (I have to admit I am excited to see Arlovski though, even though I do realize it's not 2005.) Rant: I still thought it would sell out quickly, so I bought two pairs of tickets thinking I could sell one set and make a little money. That was a dumb idea. Less than a week out and there are still pleeeenty of tickets available. They even brought the price down since I bought mine. Fuck.
Good bye Pete. Rest in Peace old friend. Some people come into your life and make it a better place through their influence. You were one of those. I'm going to miss you.