God Bless America It's a bit expensive to get OnDemand right now ($11.99), but seeing as that's the only place it's available until it's inevitable 2 week limited release... Bobcat Goldthwait wrote and directed it, and it seems like he took the Kevin Smith screenwriting class. Whole big great gobs of exposition in the form of rants. A lot of it feels forced and unnatural to organic speech, but funny nonetheless. There's also a great deal of setup, clips of fake tv shows based on real tv shows, showing how stupid our culture has become. The actual story is a bit thin and predictable. It has its moments, and watching the main characters kill people who are douchebags is quite enjoyable, but it's just not enough. It basically has the structure of a modern pop song: Setup (intro) Rant (verse) Killing (chorus) Rant Killing Setup Reflection (bridge) Killing Conclusion (coda) It's a good idea for a movie, some of the lines are quite witty, the acting is... mediocre. It's Falling Down meets Idiocracy meets Kevin Smith, but the sum is less than the parts. 5/10
There is actually a line in this movie where a character says "In some ways you've completely changed, in others you've haven't changed at all." Exactly. If you saw the first 3 films, then you're here to spend time with the characters again. Alyson Hannigan unfortunately looks to be nearing her 40s but god bless her heart. The 18 year old girl Jim was the babysittier of as seen in the previews has a perfect rack if you were wondering. Yes it was predictable, yes it is all nostalgia based, but you'll want to be in highschool again, wishing these guys were your friends. I'll probably end up watching the American Pie again within the next week to shake the nostalgia out, they of course brought back most of the 90s sountrack to make sure you felt nostalgic. 90/100 because it was exactly what I expected, but there were too many throw away one liners.
The Cabin in the Woods I say this without hyperbole: This is my favorite movie I've seen since Inception. If you're already a Joss Whedon fan, you'll definitely recognize his dialogue and plot twists. If you're like me and enjoy his work but could never quite deal with some of his quirky characters and their ironic sense of detachment, you'll enjoy the restraint he shows. Unfortunately, there's really nothing that I can say about the plot that won't ruin something for you. The very first scene leaves you with no idea what's going on, and it's awesome. If you've been on the fence about seeing it, you will not be disappointed. 7.5 cute redheaded virgins out of 8.
The Avengers: Having never read a Marvel comic, this series of films have won me over for the most part (Hulk and Iron Man 2 were the weakest links), and this one delivers on the promise of those movies. With the great reviews it's accumulating now, I'm sure the reation-brigade are going to nitpick just to be contrarian; but none of that really matters, this film is entertaining. I think Marvel did a great job at turning summer blockbusters into serial fiction. Joss Whedon as writer-director continues the line of great choices Marvel had to helm these movies (apart from stupid Leterrier), his talent for group dynamics being put to good use. He builds to a city-destroying climax much like Transformers, but I can tell you I cared a lot more about the characters in this one. Even though I don't really know what that army was. His handling of 3D was decent to, apart from a couple early scenes being a tad dark/washed out. I did think that it was too bad that Loki had less dimension as opposed to the character in Thor; this time he's an out and out bad guy and his motives are never unclear, which strikes me as being less in keeping with Norse mythology. But with this many characters in the film, thems the brakes I suppose. Ruffalo filled in for Bruce Banner quite nicely and one of his Hulk scenes elicited appluase from the theatre: Maybe it's an Aussie thing, but I've never seen audience participation like that apart from film premieres. So will it lean out of the screen and give you a handjob? No. Is it a fun time at the movies? Yes.
It's been out in the UK for a few days now, must be the same for Oz too. I tried to avoid all of the hype surrounding The Avengers, everything about it seemed too good to be true. The last thing I wanted was to go into the film thinking it will be the second coming of christ, only to be left majorly disappointed. For once, I was wrong. Very wrong. It was quite possibly the most perfect summer blockbuster / (marvel) comic book adaptation I have ever been witness to. Everything just worked. The pacing and script were fantastic. Joss Whedon managed to balance all the characters arcs fairly evenly and shot the action scenes brilliantly. I was a bit skeptical at first of Joss Whedon's appointment as writer and director. While I was confident that he could write a great comic book film, i was unsure if he could direct one as this was the first feature he has done with serious fuck you money. Yet the set pieces were well crafted and thoroughly entertaining. In short, it nailed the tone and spirit of a comic book film. The suspension of disbelief was never questioned, not matter how ridiculous things got. You just accepted it because it was aceboobs. I rarely buy in or contribute to the hype machine surrounding big releases, but by god, does this film deserve it. 10/10 Though I watched it in 3D, I really don't think it made much of a difference. Apart from seeing Scarlet Johansson in an extra dimension, the 3D wasn't utilized enough in interesting ways. It didn't take anything away from the film, but didn't add too much either so unless you are a big fan of 3D, save your money and watch the standard one. And there was a new trailer for Prometheus which was also amazing. Everything I've seen of it so far looks fantastic, I just hope it delivers.
The Cabin in the Woods For me this was a movie of high points and low points, sporadically jumping from awful to greatness. I fucking hated the first 45 minutes. Every joke fell flat, every scene felt contrived and unoriginal. After that it starts to pick up and we get some decent humor, but as soon as you think it's about to take off it spirals down again. The plot was extremely predictable, and most of the character interactions made me cringe with the exception of Richard Jenkins and Bradley Whitford, who held the movie together. Considering the rave reviews and me being a huge fan of Joss Whedon I was sorely disappointed. Spoiler I have to admit though, the part where the guy watches the Japanese kids and goes, "Fuck you. Fuck you. Fuck you. How hard is it to kill a bunch of 9 year olds?" had me rolling. Watchable, but you're probably better off seeing something else. 5/10
The Cabin in the Woods[/b[ I think horror movies suck. By and large they're cheap jump-scares or borderline torture porn. That's not to say occasionally someone can make something creepy or scary on film, but it's still not a genre I enjoy. Understand that Cabin in the Woods is not a horror film, but is a great ride for anyone who enjoys mocking them, appreciates very self-aware writing, and is entertaining throughout. Probably the biggest problem with writing about it is not giving away any of the twists (and believe me there's more than the trailer alluded to). That said the writing is good (if predictable once what the movie's actually about become clear), while not every character is likeable, that was sort of the point of them, and at moments the movie is honestly very funny. I really liked it.
The Avengers - This probably goes on a short list, next to The Dark Knight, The Watchmen and the first Ironman as one of the best comic book to movie progressions I've seen. As a Joss Wheydon groupie and long term comic book dork - I'm probably prejudiced towards the idea - but the implementation was generally excellent. The Hulk absolutely stole the show for the last third of the movie and got some of the biggest laughs from me in recent movie history. Very well implemented and seeing it on launch day was very worth while. 92/100 Salmon Fishing the Yemen - I'm not generally into this kind of movie. I much prefer comic book movies and action. But this was beautiful and inspiring and amazingly written and filmed. Amr Waked was fucking unbelievably compelling as a visionary. Emily Blunt was endearing and adorable. Ewan Macgregor pulled off awkward brittish boffin magnificently. Rachel Stirling fucking nailed her delivery and Kristin Scott Thomas was a magnificent politico bitch. Never going to be a blockbuster, but deserves to win a shitload of awards. 91/100 The Rum Diary - Johnny Depp in a Hunter S. Thompson adaption - it was good and watchable and worthwhile. I kind of expected it to be a little better though? Absolutely worth watching but probably nothing to rave about. 70/100 Haywire - Ok movie overall. The actions scenes were great, and Gina Carano's acting was honestly better than I was expecting and the supporting cast line up was fantastic- but as a whole it just didn't quite click for me. Carano's screen presence lit up the movie in a few places, and fell flat in others. Directing and writing just missed it by inches in a few places and felt ambivalent about the whole thing. Highlight of the movie was finally seeing why people think The Bunny looks like Gina Carano. In several scenes, the resemblance was remarkable. 65/100 Underworld Awakening - If you've got nothing else to watch, and you were a fan of Kate Beckinsale's performances earlier in the series, I guess it's watchable. But it's clear that the production group didn't think Beckinsale was still hot enough to carry the role. I don't think her actual body appears anywhere in the film and her face has so much makeup that it's barely her any more. Visually, every scene she appears in feels like a high quality computer game cut scene rather than a movie. Not as good as the first one. Would have been a better movie if they'd skipped the CG and written in some way to explain the fact that the immortal vampire looks 10 years older than she did in the first movie and actually filmed the actress instead of a computer game version of her. The writing had potential but missed it. 45 out of 100
The Avengers (IMAX) I guess seeing this film on the huge screen is the way to go, but anyway you see it it IS an ideal summer popcorn movie. This is the best thing Joss Whedon's done yet, and not even the fat, nit-picking Marvel Comics die hards will have much to bitch about. It's a Marvel movie, which forsakes a thick plot and character development for action and mayhem and it delivers, particularly during a knockout climax that levels Manhattan. Plenty of fun, and I picked out the "mystery dude" during the end credits (like nobody new they had a sequel in mind for this). A fast, funny time and The Hulk absolutely hijacks the last twenty minutes of the movie. Whedon makes him (finally) a real character and his timing is absolutely perfect. 8/10
The Avengers 9/10. Great movie, everything you'd want in a summer Marvel Movie with 6 different superheroes in it. I missed a few lines here or there due to the audience busting up in laughter and applause from what I'm sure were Wheadonisms. I could definitely tell who in the audience was a Marvel fan and who was a Joss Wheadon fan. My only minor complaint was the villain wasn't near threatening enough, you knew he was a petulant child and you knew on his own he wasn't powerful enough to accomplish the task. Mark Ruffalo played a great Bruce Banner and Robert Downing Jr. kills it as Stark as he has he always has.
This Means War I watched this last night with The Girlfriend. It was truly awful. The story was ridiculous, but a fun set-up that just fell flat. You watch the preview, you get 95% of the movie, with nothing but filler in between. There was no real chemistry with any actor, watching it in HD was a bad surgery contest between Witherspoon and Chelsea Handler, and the few action scenes were stupidly bad. The music was bland, and the "dates" were so cheesy and boring it was sad. None of it was funny, nor worth watching.
Act Of Valor I watched this last night and the military dork in me was captivated by the cool toys and the skydiving shots. I will give props for the attempt at making a realistic shooting sequence. I have never been in a firefight, so I can't comment on how accurate it was, but it was not over-the-top, which I appreciate. Outside of that, it was awful. It looked like a bunch of POV shots you can find on Youtube, with a Tom Clancy fan-fiction script and the WORST "acting" and line delivery I've yet heard. Nothing felt natural, and these guys all sound like Peyton Manning and they should not be in front of a camera. This is the worst example yet of the Wal-Mart patriotism you encounter when talking about the American military and it makes no sense. This is a cunt hair away from a propaganda film about joining the Navy, not to be mistaken for entertainment or a stand-alone film. I'm willing to bet this will be in the dvd player in every recruitment office waiting room across the country by 2013.
The Pirates! Band of Misfits (2012)- While I avoid most animated kids' films like the plague (The Avengers included), I love claymation and especially Aardman Animations, the British studio behind "Wallace and Gromit" and countless other quality works. This pictured appeared funny enough, too; a loser pirate ("Pirate Captain") with an awesome beard tries to win the Pirate of the Year award, all while avoiding the murderous, terrible Queen Victoria, who despises his breed. Unlike the aforementioned, amazing Wallace and Gromit, "The Pirates!" is more a film for kids. Still, it's amusing enough, with a fast pace, lighthearted silliness, and original, funny characters. I liked the historical anachronisms, especially Queen Victoria being given the personality of Gengis Khan. Door number 2 of the science competition was positively hysterical, easily the best laugh of the picture. The lone sour note was Piven's pathetic performance as Pirate Captain's main nemesis, Black Bellamy, completely taking me out of the picture. His voice was annoying, moronic, and was completely at odds with his character. Overall though, it's a solid, entertaining movie. 65/100
Battleship This movie somehow manages to be worse than it looks in the previews. It's not a "good" bad movie, just bad. Cliched, nonsensical, trite, stupid and boring. The action and effects don't even make it worthwhile. Liam Neeson is in it for about three minutes and I can only imagine how they managed to convince him to show up. For reference, the following are the worst major films I have ever seen: The Last Airbender, The Village, Dungeons and Dragons. Battleship now joins their ranks.
The Dictator If you are a fan of Sacha Baron Cohen's work then I can't imagine that you will be blown away or disappointed by it. I didn't have high expectations going in but it was better than I thought it would be. The first five minutes of the film are probably the funniest, then the laughs get to be pretty sparse. The movie did a good job of trying to be even and consistent, but too many of the jokes just didn't deliver. It wasn't nearly as good as Borat but I did like it considerably more than Bruno. 73/100
Cosigned, but I'm just going to go to 7/10 because I don't have an advanced grading rubric here. You can tell he didn't ask many opinions on the script, some jokes just didn't hit.
Moonrise Kingdom Wes Anderson is generally a polarizing director, but this movie is beautiful. If you're a fan of his, you'll love it. If you're new to him, I would say this (along with Royal Tenenbaums) is a great place to start. It has an ensemble cast including Norton, Willis, and Murray, and they all play their rolls perfectly, especially Willis. I usually hate most child actors but the kids in Moonrise did a good enough job. It's essentially a coming-of-age love story and comedy ("I'll be out back, I'm going to find a tree to chop down"). I left the theater with a deep sense of nostoglia and a dumb smile on my face. It's good. See it. The good: cast, set, pace The bad: criminal under-utilization of Bill Murray 74/76 craw daddies
I've heard a lot of good things about this. I'm not a fan of Wes Anderson overall, but I thought The Fantastic Mr. Fox was excellent, so I don't mind giving his follow-up a chance. How does it compare to something like Rushmore, for example?
Moonrise is far superior in my opinion. I just can't get past how annoying the main kid in Rushmore is. Moonrise has a tighter script, gorgeous set, and better cast. And it's funnier. If you were entertained by Mr. Fox, you'll be equally, if not more so, pleased with Moonrise. He also seems to have toned down the hipster irony and the weird meta type stuff he does. It's still there (deadpan acting, french 60s pop music, self-reference), it wouldn't be a Wes Anderson movie otherwise. But if you hated the pretentiousness of some of his previous stuff it's lessened a bit. I'd rank his movies Moonrise/Tenenbaums, Darjeeling, Mr. Fox, Aquatic, Bottle Rocket, Rushmore. And that's the end of my Wes Anderson nerd fest.