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Rise & Shine! Its Drunk Thread Time! 2/3/12

Discussion in 'General Discussion' started by Blue Dog, Feb 3, 2012.

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  1. audreymonroe

    audreymonroe
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    The most powerful cervix... in the world...

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    Fuck this. Is the puppy bowl streaming anywhere?
     
  2. CharlesJohnson

    CharlesJohnson
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    Madonna looks like albino beef jerky.

    Sunken face crusty old fucking bitch cunt. I hate Madonna. I hope she fucking dies terribly. I'm not even joking. She spits in her fan's faces, and they deserve it for eating that $300 a ticket lip-syncing 80's jerk off nostalgia right the fuck up. I am not exaggerating when I say the world is a better place without that egotistical, miserable, mean spirited, dried up slor*. I hope she chokes to death on her daily ration of tofu, 2 bean sprouts, and orphan tears.


    *Slor (Sl-or, slohr). Noun. A person who is a combination of both a slut and a whore.
     
  3. hooker

    hooker
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    Here are some highlights.
     
  4. hooker

    hooker
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    I want to learn how to punt a football.
     
  5. CharlesJohnson

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    Start by using Madonna's dried up cunny. Same texture as a football, twice as fat and saggy.
     
  6. hooker

    hooker
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    Laces in or out?
     
  7. audreymonroe

    audreymonroe
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    The most powerful cervix... in the world...

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    These puppies have no idea how to play football. This game is sloppy.
     
  8. dieformetal

    dieformetal
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    Hurricanes Are My Bitch

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    I liked the Chevy/apocalypse commercial. That could just be because I hate fords though.

    Also, fuck Madonna.
     
  9. dieformetal

    dieformetal
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    Hurricanes Are My Bitch

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    I liked the Chevy/apocalypse commercial. That could just be because I hate fords though.

    Also, fuck Madonna.
     
  10. CharlesJohnson

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    It is only in my most satisfying dreams that someone has taken the time, put themselves in such personal danger, to sew that witch-hag's pussy shut. I assume the only thread suitable, sustainable, for the job would be some ancient Greek Golden Fleece like material that could withstand dragon's breath. It's a job for seal team 6. Not every man will come back alive from the precipice of that gaping fanged Sarlac. I also imagine another pussy, a smaller pussy on a fat muscly rope of corded flesh and gore, with rows of serrated, rotating shark teeth that shoots out to collect the prey. You know, like an Alien.
     
  11. hooker

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    Rumour has it she was wearing Patriots panties.

    Anyone notice?
     
  12. downndirty

    downndirty
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    [​IMG]

    Anyone else think he got fired for his role in House Party 3?

    She wasn't wearing panties, didn't you read Johnson's post? Her vagina looks like an unholy matrimony of a catcher's mitt and a half dozen sets of hammerhead shark's jaws with an odor of stale, petrified black vomit.
     
  13. CharlesJohnson

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    I'm assuming those panties are swallowed forever more, or turned to dust in the instant a handler slapped them on her with an asbestos glove. You know damn well she has servants for that sort of thing. I'd be surprised if she wipes her own ass.

    Rumor has it if you put a mentos in Madonna's old pussy a geyser of black tar and swallowed, moaning souls shoots out.
     
  14. Dcc001

    Dcc001
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    New Bitch On Top

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    Aaand Tom Brady just shit the bed pretty spectacularly.
     
  15. Nom Chompsky

    Nom Chompsky
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    Honorary TiBette

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    probably nervous.
     
  16. CharlesJohnson

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    Madonna was probably doing 1000 push ups, licking her cracked lips, while winking at him on each full execution. I dare any man not to be frazzled by that.
     
  17. mya

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    Awww, herewego was cute, but i am a sucker for dogs.
     
  18. xrayvision

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    I'm sitting on the couch at a super bowl party of these extremely wealthy people who donate millions of dollars every year to scientific causes. Without their contributions, the scientific and medical community would suffer in terms of research.

    And for some reason for the first time in at least 10 years, I popped a random boner just now. Getting called to the board in 4th grade math, style. I don't know why. My mind is not anywhere sexual at the moment and I am 28 years old. Why did I get a random boner? Of all places, why here?

    I currently have a pillow on my lap until it goes away.
     
  19. hooker

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    Almost for sure. That would have been funny.
     
  20. hooker

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    [​IMG]
     
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