My dad's international sales lead is kind of a weird dude. He's from a very wealthy Dutch family who invented a new strain of Tulip in the 1800s so even though he's a pretty successful salesman, he has far more money than his position would provide and tons of weird rich dude habits. He lives in Traverse City, MI even though my Dad's business is in Milwaukee, but my Dad lets it slide cause he's traveling abroad often. But his behavior has been a bit squirrely in recent years and my Dad is getting wary. Well this morning, my Dad gets an email from him basically announcing in very bizarre wording that he's met "the one" and how much she's loved him and inviting my dad to the wedding with plenty of notice. The rub? It's a 20 something Chinese woman. He's been divorced 3 times and the most recent was to a 22 year old Vietnamese girl who spoke hardly any English. And the advance notice? For a wedding the first week in August in fucking Nanking. This has gotta be another mail order deal. So fucking weird
Traverse City is great, I can see why he'd want to be there instead of Milwaukee. The rest of the story though... Dutch are known for being weird anyway
This weather is a pain in the ass. Two months of tornados, t-storms and almost daily rain? I'm over it. We had a drought for 10+ years and now all of our lakes are over by 15+ feet? This is dumb. When it rains, it pours. I think another couple hit on us last night. I've been propositioned by couples before, but it was just me. First time where my husband was present. I'm pretty sure this was a nice younger couple from the Midwest who were testing the waters. I have a knack for attracting couples where the guy seems pretty normal and average and the chick looks like Adam Richman in drag. No Miranda Kerr or Adriana Lima lookalike for this bitch.
She throws a drunk arm around you and breathes loudly into your ear YOU AN ME LOOK LIKE WE COULD BE SISSSSSTURS. *vomit* AN DONT WURRY BOUT ME GETTIN PREGNANT COS I ALREADY AM *burps up a little puke, swollows it*
No in that part of the world it is the thing to do to find a rich expat and marry him as soon as the moon allows. One of my buddies from Shanghai was on like his third Chinese wife, he'd finally knocked the girl he was dating up. I heard he also had two other girls on the side. Plus he was the Soapy connoisseur of the group. It's a big free for all over there if you are a businessman and not some dirty backpacker or ESL teacher, though they do alright.
Good weather, great motorcycle ride, a cold beer and the Warriors are killing the Rockets at the end of three quarters. Just a killer day and tomorrow I am taking the twins to open cockpit day at a nearby airplane museum. I am quite certain that Memorial Day weekends do not get much better.
Yep. I hate to say it, but Asia is the world's whorehouse. My father used to find any reason in the world to go over there without his wife and return to tell stories about all the women he slept with because he had money. He was 60 at the time. I kind of understand it because the poverty there is staggering. When I was there (20 years ago) I could go to a nice restaurant, eat a filling meal with a beer and leave a HUGE tip for $2.00. I was told I tipped way to much...My 50 cent tip was pretty much a day's wage for the waitress.
Going to the Philippines was like shooting fish in a barrel with dynamite. Everyone wanted to marry me, or have their daughter marry me. And I definitely wasn't in a touristy part of the country, either.
I'll fully admit that I haven't read shit in this thread. Tonight was my 10 year reunion and I miss most of my class. There were some fun motherfuckers, I'm here to tell you. What the fuck do you do when a former classmate, who happens to be enggaged to your god damned sister, fucking grabs your leg under the table? Do you tell your sister? Does this shit make me the bad guy? What the fuck? (I told my husband, I'm not a piece of shit [anymore] son of a bitch, this fucking sucks. I can't pull a Duggar and not tell anyone but how do I not say anything at all?) I'm not drunk enough for this shit.
This is how my town has gotten come summer: Guy escaped from rehab #1 starts a fight, in front of a restaurant/bar, because no one wants to give him booze money. His friend rips off his own shirt screaming, "I TAKE YOU OUT AND THIS IS HOW YOU REPAY ME." Waitress smokes a cigarette next to the propane tanks. Guy from rehab #2 has a hat on the ground with change and bills in it. Instead of playing a guitar or something, he is singing karaoke of the same song as the bar band across the street. He is also topless and either drunk or high as fuck. In the park on a bench, next to my car, is a man with an obviously distended stomach. He is puking. All of these events are within 2 blocks of each other. It is a complete shit show out there tonight. Happy Memorial Day, vets.
Dear cocaine dealers, I hope you are happy with yourself. Did you sell to everyone who walked into the bar tonight?
I know that ab, CJ, and dew posted some dramatic stuff back-to-back in this thread. I don't mean to brag, but I read a magazine yesterday and edged the driveway.
You're part of the problem. You make me sick. They must teach this shit in school, because remember all of your problems are solved by taking your shirt off and yelling loudly. Especially at bar owners. I guess it's the result of a long weekend, but it has been a while since the nutters have been out in full force. My theory stands. Everyone who is having a bad go comes down here because fun in the sun will obviously solve all of their crazy. Except the heat scrambles what is left of their brain, making for thousands of hilarious mugshots. As much as I love the beach and the general lifestyle here, shit like this makes me want to move far away. Somewhere white trash tweakers can't get me. It's only to become worse; the population is set to add another 100k a year for the next 10 years. I'm sure they will all be stable, productive citizens and in no way following their drug dealer.
There's some Biblical shit going on down here, y'all. All last night my phone kept going off with flash flood warnings and the tornado sirens were howling. My friends down south are posting about being evacuated and cars getting swept away. And my cousin hydroplaned on 35 and spun across 3 lanes. This whole state is flooding. What the hell is going on?
Maybe God decided to sacrifice Texas. I really thought Florida would be first though. In all seriousness shit is weird all over Texas, Oklahoma, and Kansas. I guess it's El Niño x global warming. The problem is we desperately need to amp up water conservation. That's a tough sell to begin with, but people definitely aren't going to do that when they are getting at least an inch of rain every week.