It is fucking blazing out. Still. My body is drenched and my hair went from combed to "scraggily bird nest of failure." The heat is making people desperate, crazier. In a 2 block radius some guy was screaming at himself, a whore and her pimp were trolling a taco stand, and so many cracked out prostitutes. So many hookers. I almost feel bad enough to give them $20 just to go fucking eat; that is how haggard these girls look. Half a dozen of them already. It was 10 p.m. This isn't some back alley ghetto either, it's U.S. 1 through a tourist town. Shit is getting bad. By Tuesday morning people will be dead. This is Florida Man's weekend. I feel it.
And here I am just happily surprised that Killjoys and Dark Matter spin back up tonight. My next door neighbour is an exec chef for a big restaurant group in town, and he just came over and had some of my sangria. He says it's the best he ever had, and wants the recipe so he can serve it at his restaurants. Colour me impressed with myself. I gave him the recipe, and he's hooking me up with all sorts of cool shit from his restaurants, including a whack of his mother yeast from his award winning home-made bread, some kitchen hardware (a commercial grade mixer and blender), a sous vide machine, and free produce/fruit from their farm that supplies all their restaurants. Who knew that being a discerning alcoholic would score me cool shit?
Yeah, but can he give you a reputation point for it? I think not, so you should totally post the recipe so I can impress my discerning--scratch that--my alcoholic friends.
It's really quite easy... tons of fresh fruit (blueberries, strawberries, black grapes, oranges, cherries) and then add about a half cup of sugar and a 1/3 bottle of triple sec and then fill it with red wine (cab sauv works well). Let it sit in the fridge for 3-5 days. Drink killer sangria and eat knock-you-on-your-ass alcohol infused fruit. The real key is the time it sits imbibing the flavours. You can't rush it. And all that fruit, slice it up or crush it so that the inside of the fruit gets exposed to the alcohol so that it ferments and gets tasty. When you serve it, use 3 parts sangria, 1 part sprite. Trust me, it makes a huge difference.
Man, you should just mercy-kill them and invest in a meat-locker for yourself to just sleep in while gibbering madness happens outside. As far as the heat here, fuck, I smelled myself today and I am a man who showers with regularity, had deodorant in his pits and I still after just walking around outside for a few hours smelled like curry, garlic and rotten beef for some reason. Humidity at 54% makes for cool nights and ass-sweating-from-just-driving days here in ol' North Idaho. Meanwhile a friend of mine in South Carolina is basically drowning from just breathing outside, but my point stands.
That person is a bitch. It was 70%ish last night and it wasn't even that bad. You tell them not to come back if they want to live.
We're at an unholy 68% right now. It's monsoon season in the desert...we had 2 people drown in Thursday's storm, had another big one blow through over night, and with the humidity in the air I'm sure the heat is going to cook up another storm by this afternoon.
I was going to make some snide remark about how the WDT used to be filled with actual drunk people instead of old men talking about the weather, but I have nothing to add except it's been 100*+ for the last week and we're finally getting some cooler weather,
It's cyclical. There used to be titties, too. Now it's just fireworks booty. We lost Roxanne, Jennitalia and 'funball. But we sucked abneretta and now Pimptress back in. TMrainbow popped back, but I guess she moved on. This is where all the cool kids hang out.
That reminds me of the girl who went off on everyone for being old and boring because no one on the drunk thread was getting fucked up on a Tuesday night.
I put irish cream in my coffee this morning. Getting the day started off right. Tomorrow I'm headed to my brother's place for dinner on their patio and will bring a gin and tonic bar. How do people like their G&Ts garnished (or not)? Last week I had one in Buenos Aires that was awesome, it had a touch of grapefruit and yerba mate with the house made gin and tonic. My fiancee had one with mandarin that was also great, but mine was memorably good. Little sweet, little bitter, and strong. Spoiler: G&T
I'm in SD and its the best beer city, I won't even argue it because its just a fact, its the greatest city in the world, first discovered by the Germans... I was at Pizza Port last night, one of our usual places to go, and they had Hop Jungle on tap. Absolutely amazing.
What? There used to be kitties? (Autocorrect changed that for me and I'm not changing it back.) To hit all the points, it's 72 degrees with 88% humidity here in west central Missouri, I hope to become intoxicated tonight at a Fourth of July party but it depends on who's driving, I like my G&T with a lime or a cucumber slice depending on which gin was used, and I think that brings me up to speed. We have a kids birthday party to go to this evening before we go to the other party. Everything always seems to get planned for the same day lately, we've either got nowhere to be or we need to be at three places at once.
You didn't mention fireworks in your butt. Also, autocorrect clearly thinks you should be talking about titties more often. There was a hilarious bit on The League that Taco did about "Breast Awareness Month" where he did a cross section sketch of the titty, including "magma" center and "the squishy part." I'm too lazy to look for it.