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THE 2016 4th OF JULY WDT REALLY NSFW

Discussion in 'General Discussion' started by shegirl, Jun 29, 2016.

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  1. Nettdata

    Nettdata
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    Mr. Toast

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  2. toytoy88

    toytoy88
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    Alone in the dark, drooling on himself

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    Speaking of shit shows, here's a police scanner for a neighborhood in Chicago: http://www.broadcastify.com/listen/feed/763/web

    In the last half hour it's been constant...shots fired, mattress thrown at someone, attempted murder with a baseball bat, 30 people fighting and on and on and on...

    It's only Wednesday. There's not enough money in the world to get me to do that job.
     
  3. Revengeofthenerds

    Revengeofthenerds
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    ER Frequent Flyer Platinum Member

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    You know what takes a coon to heaven quicker than raising it as a pet and giving it "the good life"?

    A .22
     
  4. Crown Royal

    Crown Royal
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    Just call me Topher

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    Im going to say given the current state of things, there's a 50% chance that cops did this.

    One out of every three athletes is leaving that city with CancerAIDS. The Olympics have gone from the pinnacle of sports prestige to an undrained cesspool with no cover in less than half my life.

    And then there's FIFA. Thank god they're still around to undo all this corruption damage.
     
  5. Trakiel

    Trakiel
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    Call me Caitlyn. Got any cake?

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    I'm generally a big-hearted love-the-animals type, but I make an exception for raccoons. Those fuckers are nothing but trouble and I wouldn't hesitate in the slightest to put one down if it started sniffing around my property. Before I moved to the city I lived in small towns and the country and had friends and neighbors whose cats were killed by coons and who had to put dogs down because they fought a coon and were infected with rabies. They're also destructive little fuckers and will tear apart anything they think might contain or be between them and food.

    They're just bad news all around.
     
  6. Revengeofthenerds

    Revengeofthenerds
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    I just got three more traps in today. All this rain in Texas has brought them in heavy. Of course, the best trap is my scope at night at my 870 during the day (plus a few fireworks to scare them outta their homes). But you do what you gotta do. I'm sure they serve a purpose.... whatever it is. I haven't discovered what they do. Except destruction. Only vermin I hate more than them are hogs and armadillo.
     
  7. Crown Royal

    Crown Royal
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    Just call me Topher

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    A raccoon's purpose in life is to get stuck in a garbage bin and then kill you when you try to get them out. They are walking razor blades.

    But also do cute things with their hands, like so:

     
  8. toddamus

    toddamus
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    At least hogs taste good. Never heard anyone say that eating raccoon was amazing.
     
  9. Flat_Rate

    Flat_Rate
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    They aren't amazing but if you brine them in vinegar long enough and then fry them in oil with some flour it makes for a decent meal.
     
  10. Revengeofthenerds

    Revengeofthenerds
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    I've been shooting armadillos, all the live long day
    Fuck, I've blasted fuckin' 4 of them now
    Gotta start saving that ammo away!!
     
  11. dixiebandit69

    dixiebandit69
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    Hey, I've said that! Yeah, I've eaten raccoons before, and I'll do it again. Like Flat Rate said, a good marinade makes all the difference (although I baked my coons).

    Anyway, I'll weigh in on the whole "baldness pill" issue: No.
    Not just no, but fuck no. What the hell is the point of trying to look good, if not to ultimately get laid?
    Besides, if I did start going bald, I can pull off the shaved skull; actually, I've been told that I look very intimidating with a shaved head and facial hair.

    It doesn't look like I'm going to have to worry about that, though: I'm in my mid 30s now, and aside from a slight bit of recession at the corners of my forehead, my hair is still as thick and awesome as it was when I was 18... However, in the last few months, I've been finding silver hairs for the first time ever. That sucks. I've been plucking them out as soon as I find them, but I'm afraid that there will come a day when there will be too many for that to be feasible.
    I blame my dad: My mom said that by the time he was 40, his hair was completely white.

    BUT AT LEAST I'M NOT GOING BALD!
     
  12. CanisDirus

    CanisDirus
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    From my great-grandpa and grandpa's records handed down to my dad, the taste of raccoon is lamb-ish.
     
  13. Crown Royal

    Crown Royal
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    Just call me Topher

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    Raccoons are trash animals, period. They are the very definition of the term. They eat garbage, other animal's shit and their own shit. They are turkey vultures without wings. WHY the fuck would anybody eat one unless they had no choice?
     
  14. toddamus

    toddamus
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    When I worked at a golf course last summer the real menace was Canadian geese. Evil, angry, filthy, smelly, disgusting bastards. I've never met an animal that was so pissed off just by my presence. Maybe it didn't help I chased them with the cards and the lawnmowers, maybe it didn't help that we chucked rocks at them, but they crapped all over the course and were horrible.

    Meanwhile, we treated the ducks very well. The ducks are awesome, tasty, cute little creatures that just mind their own business and aren't angry all the time. I remember I was weed whacking once, saw some ducklings and a mother/father, stopped doing that for a moment to let them pass and continued on. They were maybe less than 3 yards from me. Get within 3 yards of a goose and see what happens.
     
  15. PIMPTRESS

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  16. dixiebandit69

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    Ever eaten chicken, Crown? Ever seen how chickens live and eat? And I'm not even talking about "factory farms;" chickens are disgusting, filthy animals that indiscriminately shit EVERYWHERE, and eat basically anything they find on the ground (including the aforementioned shit), but I'll eat them anyway.
    Do you eat fish? Because you know that they piss/shit in the same water that they live in, don't you?

    It never ceases to amaze me how people will call one animal "filthy" and refuse to eat it, but overlook the filthiness of a different creature.

    Also, just for the record, the 'coons I ate were from out in the country, and probably a lot cleaner that a city-caught animal.
     
  17. toddamus

    toddamus
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    Some religions consider pigs filthy and don't eat them for that reason. I consider them tasty and enjoy bacon every single time. Every animal is gross. When one of my favorite dogs was a puppy, he'd bring in frozen poo nuggets inside in the winter.
     
  18. toytoy88

    toytoy88
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    Alone in the dark, drooling on himself

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  19. Rush-O-Matic

    Rush-O-Matic
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    The men that are choosing between "go bald, stay hard" vs "get hair, go limp" and aren't automatically rejecting the pill are married, and aren't going to get laid much anymore, anyway. They want to keep hair, so they can pretend they could still get laid if they wanted to.

    Hey, at least there won't be a restroom controversy. No humans can just go outside, right? Some dude, somewhere, is going get stopped by a cop for pissing on an alley wall. Then, he's going to claim, "no, officer! I identify as a raccoon, and therefore it is in my nature to pee here. If you arrest me, I will sue and take it all the way to the Supreme Court!"

    Speaking of cops . . . is it just me, or does anybody else see the headline Turkey Arrests 13 In Connection To Fatal Airport Attack and get this image in their head?

    [​IMG]
     
  20. Angel_1756

    Angel_1756
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    The Big Four-Oh

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    My boss just came out of his office and wished me a happy Friday.
    "Actually it's Thursday."
    "No it's not. It's Friday."
    Then he went back into his office and slammed the door. I don't even know.
     
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