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The 2017 Holiday WDT

Discussion in 'General Discussion' started by shegirl, Dec 21, 2016.

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  1. Angel_1756

    Angel_1756
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    The Big Four-Oh

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    This morning...

    Husband: "Babe, what are you eating?"
    Me: "Just some toast..."
    Husband: "Really? Because it smells like chi..."
    Me: "It's stuffing, okay? I'm eating a bowl of stuffing. Fuck off."
     
    #301 Angel_1756, Jan 2, 2017
  2. Revengeofthenerds

    Revengeofthenerds
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    ER Frequent Flyer Platinum Member

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    Don't worry, El Preggo wife has already taken to eating bowls of frozen shredded cheese.

    It's so common there's no longer any joy in making fun of her.
     
    #302 Revengeofthenerds, Jan 2, 2017
  3. TX.

    TX.
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    The Mad Pooper

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    No shame in eating stuffing (we call it dressing) any time of the day. I'll eat it hot or cold for days after Thanksgiving and Christmas.
     
    #303 TX., Jan 2, 2017
  4. Rush-O-Matic

    Rush-O-Matic
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    You're welcome.

    Use half that amount of sage, because, yuck, that's too much. And, chop that celery a LOT finer than shown in the video, because also yuck. For you sad people that don't have Krystal, I guess you can use White Castle?
     
    #304 Rush-O-Matic, Jan 2, 2017
  5. Crown Royal

    Crown Royal
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    Just call me Topher

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    #305 Crown Royal, Jan 2, 2017
  6. downndirty

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    So, in the spirit of 2016....I went to work forgetting it was an observed holiday. I'm the only one there, so I did some clean up and left at ten. Ran errands and decided I was going to The Girl's house for lunch. Typed a text, but apparently didn't send it.

    Got there and her ex's car is backed into the driveway.

    So, once they are done, I get to clean my own shit out of her house. What fun!

    I get one line to say to her, before I bounce.

    TIB: What are my last words to the girl I caught cheating?
     
    #306 downndirty, Jan 2, 2017
  7. Angel_1756

    Angel_1756
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    The Big Four-Oh

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    Can't go wrong with a solid "fuck you, bitch".
     
    #307 Angel_1756, Jan 2, 2017
  8. Juice

    Juice
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    Moderately Gender Fluid

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    Don't say anything, just hold her down and fart in her mouth until she suffocates to death.
     
    #308 Juice, Jan 2, 2017
  9. dieformetal

    dieformetal
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    Hurricanes Are My Bitch

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    "Enjoy the (insert STD of your choice here)!"
     
    #309 dieformetal, Jan 2, 2017
  10. dieformetal

    dieformetal
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    Hurricanes Are My Bitch

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    Only make sure you're screaming about this being "your noble right!" and all that. You'll want to project an air of dignity, after all.
     
    #310 dieformetal, Jan 2, 2017
  11. Currer Bell

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    I can't get it to start at the 40 second mark, but that's what I'm going for.

     
    #311 Currer Bell, Jan 2, 2017
  12. Revengeofthenerds

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    "You weren't better than [insert her friend's name here]."
     
    #312 Revengeofthenerds, Jan 2, 2017
  13. Angel_1756

    Angel_1756
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    The Big Four-Oh

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    Ftfy
     
    #313 Angel_1756, Jan 2, 2017
  14. Aetius

    Aetius
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    "I see what your mother meant now"
     
    #314 Aetius, Jan 2, 2017
  15. jdoogie

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    "Well, at least now I can stop pretending that there isn't a weird smell coming from your vagina."
     
    #315 jdoogie, Jan 2, 2017
  16. TX.

    TX.
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    The Mad Pooper

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    Don't say a single word as you're gathering your stuff. That drives women crazy.
     
    #316 TX., Jan 2, 2017
  17. NatCH

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    Absolutely. Why should you say something? She got caught. Peace the fuck out.
     
    #317 NatCH, Jan 2, 2017
  18. Rush-O-Matic

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    Yeah, but after he gets all his stuff, he's still supposed to masturbate and jizz all over the carpet in her den, right?
     
    #318 Rush-O-Matic, Jan 2, 2017
  19. joule_thief

    joule_thief
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    Like TX said, nothing. You should, however, upper deck the toilet before you go.
     
    #319 joule_thief, Jan 2, 2017
  20. toddamus

    toddamus
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    Can't go wrong with an upper decker or slashing her tires. Actions speak louder than words.

    Or you could send an email to all her colleagues accidentally telling them she cheated on you with her ex
     
    #320 toddamus, Jan 2, 2017
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