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The 2017 Superbowl WDT NSFW

Discussion in 'General Discussion' started by shegirl, Feb 1, 2017.

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  1. toddamus

    toddamus
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    Emotionally Jaded

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    Buy more?
     
  2. dieformetal

    dieformetal
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    Hurricanes Are My Bitch

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    Too late. Daughter's asleep and the liquor store's closed anyway. Curse my mismanagement of time!
     
  3. Revengeofthenerds

    Revengeofthenerds
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    ER Frequent Flyer Platinum Member

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    I make fun of my wife all the time for having to be pregnant during the summer. I rub it in.

    She's the one who wanted to continue trying, knowing full well the consequences of having a child at that time meant she was gonna deal with the Texas summers with a parasite growing in her. I made her well of aware of what this would entail and how miserable she'd be. So who am I to turn down sex if she still insists on trying?

    If someone touches a clearly marked live electric wire do you coddle them and say "aww you poor thing"? No, you point and laugh at them.
     
  4. abneretta

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    Generally most people who bother to announce it are happy about it, or have at least come to terms with it. If not you'll probably know by their tone when they mention it.
     
  5. toddamus

    toddamus
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    So you're kind of saying your cock is a livewire which no one should touch
     
  6. TX.

    TX.
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    The Mad Pooper

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    It's probably been likened to worse things.
     
  7. Revengeofthenerds

    Revengeofthenerds
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    That, and the fact that they are running into things with suspicious frequency and looking nostalgically at flights of stairs.
     
  8. abneretta

    abneretta
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    I was pregnant through the summer with both my kids, but that's what I deserved for trying to plan to have them during peak at work. Instead things worked faster than we expected and I ended up with babies in September and October when we were shooting for November.

    Yes, I'm that person who always shows up early.
     
  9. abneretta

    abneretta
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    I started to ask why people don't have cutesy abortion announcements on Facebook but stopped myself, I guess I forgot where I was.
     
  10. toddamus

    toddamus
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    Know whats ironic or purposeful? I'm the President of NAMI on Campus Twin Cities and an intern at NAMI Minnesota. NAMI stands for the National Alliance for (or of i forget) Mental Illness.
     
  11. toddamus

    toddamus
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    I think that makes sense, its like saying we had a good time but you know shit happens.

    My sociopathic mind is coming out tonight I guess. Dark humor day for me.
     
  12. Revengeofthenerds

    Revengeofthenerds
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    Nothing wrong with it. Since my wife and I work together it makes for a very interesting dynamic, like right now since weird things can make pregger women vomit during their first trimester my wife has an extreme aversion to meat. So whenever she tells someone this at work, they always get this mischievous grin and she clarifies "yes, even [RoTN's] meat."

    At any rate, every other generation of females on my wife's side has had twins. It was her turn. So of course I was nervous as hell for my first son, and before my wife's first sonogram this time I was very clear when coworkers and stuff asked that if there were two heart beats I was hoping one would eat the one in the womb because I didn't wanna pay for two. Or that my wife would have to pick the cutest one and we'd sell the other one on the black market.

    When the sonogram only showed one heart beat, my facebook was full of "one is better than two" type shit.
     
  13. dieformetal

    dieformetal
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    Hurricanes Are My Bitch

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    You should not stop yourself. This should be your next Facebook update. Then report back with responses.
     
  14. abneretta

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    They would be entertaining as hell, I live in the middle of the bible belt. Unfortunately I'm not drinking tonight, remind me next time I'm in here posting love stories to gin.
     
  15. Crown Royal

    Crown Royal
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    Just call me Topher

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    I thought you lived in the Chastity Belt because that's the most popular female name there.
     
  16. Revengeofthenerds

    Revengeofthenerds
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    And I'll ask it at my next inlaw family gathering. Bunch of fucking inbred, bible thumping gay (and black and mexican) hating shitfucks. I'll ask it like as a joke then say we woulda done it if the sonogram showed the baby wearing a "Make America Great Again" hat.

    I'll be chased out of the house with shotguns and a bunch of lonestars thrown at my back.
     
  17. TX.

    TX.
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    What about "Thank God I'm Not Pregnant!" cutesy bullshit. Cause who hasn't been there, amirite? Like Barney Stinson's Not A Fathers Day.
     
  18. Cmr88

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    Experienced Idiot

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    This conversation is like a car crash.
     
  19. abneretta

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    I remember when I was still dating my husband and went to a family dinner. I had just got the cartilage of my ear pierced, my soon-to-be (but not for long) sister-in-law pulled me aside and said that the family would hate it. She might have been right, I've also gotten a passive aggressive discussion about what the bible says about tattoos (they're bad) but I tend to not really give a shit. Oddly enough, I really like his family I just don't discuss politics or religion with them. I do always bring knitting to family gatherings, his and mine, so I can keep my mouth shut instead of blowing up at the idiotic things that are said from time to time.

    I thought that was in line with the conversation but now I'm not sure. Oh well.
     
  20. Revengeofthenerds

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    I've gotten the same thing about tattoos. Every time I get one, every person has to tell me what the bible says despite me having told them all I'm atheist (guess they're trying to save me or some shit). I've heard the story about defiling my body and crap enough that I now have a canned answer: "what does the bible say about killing children, incest, genocide, beating your wife?" I've recently added the line that "you know if jesus was alive today he'd be banned from entering the US?"

    I wish I had that filter on my mouth that allows me to keep politics and religion out of it when people bring that shit up in front of me. But if someone is talking about it for more than a few minutes, and they either involve me in it or they start the conversation where I was first, I speak up. My business is my business, and as long as you aren't hurting anyone you have a right to believe whatever you want, but if you attack me or involve me, shit's going down.

    I don't like them if you can't tell.
     
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