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The 2nd Annual Christmas & New Years Drunk Thread 2010! NSFW

Discussion in 'Weekly Drunk Threads' started by Blue Dog, Dec 1, 2010.

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  1. ssycko

    ssycko
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    Ahahaha all the responses to my post have made me giggle a lot, especially the after party that we definitely had.

    No, you numbskulls, he's gay and also sexually frustrated so I got a bunch of gin in him, gave him the pep talk and then he went and got himself some man-ass. THAT is why I was happy.

    So I need to think of something to get my dad for Christmas. He's a tough guy to buy for, as most guys are, so coming up with something good is hard. He doesn't have an awful lot of hobbies outside of playing sports, and he's set for everything there. I usually get him something beer related as he really likes finding new beers and trying everything, but I kind of want to do something different. Any suggestions?
     
    #1981 ssycko, Dec 18, 2010
  2. Nitwit

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    Take him to a gay bar and drunken trick fuck him into making out with a man?
     
    #1982 Nitwit, Dec 18, 2010
  3. ASL

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    Does he brew his own beer? That seems like a good next step.

    Vermont's licensing system is pretty similar to New Mexico's, you get it printed right there for you, none of the sketchy passport carrying needed.
     
    #1983 ASL, Dec 18, 2010
  4. Crown Royal

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    Just call me Topher

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    That sounds like a recovery lie if you ask me. Let me guess: you were the only one not twirling your shirt around your head. I'm guessing you guys were friends since childhood:

    [​IMG]
     
    #1984 Crown Royal, Dec 18, 2010
  5. kuhjäger

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    Yeah, I had enough fear carrying around my passport when I lived in Germany. Here because I needed to show it so much it was pretty nerve wracking, I was checking my pocket constantly. I have barely gone out to bars for fear of having nothing should I lose it.

    Anyway, fuck that noise, time to make Christmas cookies.

    I just wish I could eat all the delicious Christmas baked goods.
     
    #1985 kuhjäger, Dec 18, 2010
  6. taste_my_rainbow

    taste_my_rainbow
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    Does anyone else's family go really overboard at Christmas or is it just mine? The amount of gifts we give each other is ridiculous.

    The list of what my dad and brother are getting is in the spoiler, just as an example.
    Dad
    2 pair of jeans
    2 pair of Carhartt pants
    4 LS tshirts
    a huge gas grill
    a big clamp on LED light for one of the grills (he already has the huge charcoal grill)
    set of drill/screwdriver bits
    running shoes
    socks/underwear
    bottle of Beaujolais

    Brother
    greenhouse
    8 cu ft promix
    worm castings
    jeans
    running shoes
    slippers
    Case knife
    2 LS tshirts
    car charger for phone
    beard clipper/trimmer thingy

    And I don't give a shit how big the box is (it's huge) or how many rolls of wrapping paper it takes, I'm wrapping the greenhouse.
     
    #1986 taste_my_rainbow, Dec 18, 2010
  7. kuhjäger

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    This year, despite it being our best year ever in terms of money making, we aren't going overboard at all. (Or so the lady thinks. She hasn't gone a year without a box from Tiffany.) We honestly just don't have anything that we want or need.

    My father in law paid for the wedding, so he is getting some kick ass stuff. My mom went to Guatemala to visit the family she sponsors, so she is on some hippie "I don't need anything" kick, so we are giving the money we would have spent on a gift for her the the family in Guatemala. If she doesn't cry, I know I am on to her.
     
    #1987 kuhjäger, Dec 18, 2010
  8. ssycko

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    Is this even possible/ why does this keep coming up? I don't think a man can get drunk enough to accidentally make out with a guy if he's into women. If you're just trying to tell us that you hope it happens to you some day, that's great, we still love you no matter what you want to put your penis in.
     
    #1988 ssycko, Dec 18, 2010
  9. Fernanthonies

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    This might be one of the funniest things I have ever seen:

     
    #1989 Fernanthonies, Dec 18, 2010
    Last edited by a moderator: Mar 27, 2015
  10. tweetybird

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    Fuck. Merrily wrapping presents and about to slit open a box with a dull shitty knife and sliced into the tip of my finger instead. So now I'm taking a break to check in with you jackals while I hold my hand up and apply pressure. Classic, just classic.

    And now my husband is laughing at me for typing this post with one hand. Do you know how hard... wait. I realize I am talking to the world's most expert population of one-handed web surfers. Nevermind.
     
    #1990 tweetybird, Dec 18, 2010
  11. toejam

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    Finally got around to trying four loko last night at a party. I've had a bizarre hangover today, no doubt caused by that nuclear waste colored piss. I think the only thing that's going to kick this now is a beer.
     
    #1991 toejam, Dec 18, 2010
  12. Nitwit

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    Calm down, ssycko. I was only hoping to get you to "giggle" a little more.

    I have no doubt that you are, in fact, a confident heterosexual.



    Merry Christmas.
     
    #1992 Nitwit, Dec 18, 2010
    Last edited by a moderator: Mar 27, 2015
  13. Diablo

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    NEW ORLEANS!!!! Beads and boobs even in December!!!
     
    #1993 Diablo, Dec 18, 2010
  14. xrayvision

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    Can anyone tell me why Michael Cera is famous? How is being an annoying pussy ever won anyone anything, ever? He is like this is all of his roles. Its an insult to masculinity.
     
    #1994 xrayvision, Dec 18, 2010
  15. p00g0blin

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    Cloaked & choked.
     

    Attached Files:

    #1995 p00g0blin, Dec 18, 2010
  16. Dcc001

    Dcc001
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    New Bitch On Top

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    Here's a better question: why are both Michael Cera and Jesse Eisenberg famous? They are the same person, they play the same guy in every role they land. Sooo...why are there two?

    At least Michael Cera gets some credit for Arrested Development. Maybe they cloned him, so in case he died they'd have a spare?
     
    #1996 Dcc001, Dec 18, 2010
  17. $100T2

    $100T2
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    For those who feel sad and alone this holiday season:

     
    #1997 $100T2, Dec 18, 2010
    Last edited by a moderator: Mar 27, 2015
  18. xrayvision

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    Still awesome.
     
    #1998 xrayvision, Dec 18, 2010
    Last edited by a moderator: Mar 27, 2015
  19. Frank

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    I'm convinced this temporary license thing is the Government's way of fucking with us. New Hampshire use to do this too, but about two years ago they went backwards in time and started issuing temporary paper ID's and mailing the real ones 90 days later, the hilarious part is that the license itself DIDN'T CHANGE AT ALL! There is no way they didn't do this just to make it hard for 21-25 years olds be able to buy booze.
     
    #1999 Frank, Dec 18, 2010
  20. RCGT

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    [​IMG]
    +
    [​IMG]
    =
    [​IMG]

    PS: Fuck Europeans who like to talk about Wikileaks and the concept of American exceptionalism, but really just use it as a veiled excuse to bash on the US for their inferiority complex.

    Mods go ahead and delete that if it's too political.
     
    #2000 RCGT, Dec 18, 2010
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