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The 2nd Annual Christmas & New Years Drunk Thread 2010! NSFW

Discussion in 'Weekly Drunk Threads' started by Blue Dog, Dec 1, 2010.

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  1. Kratos

    Kratos
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    Emotionally Jaded

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    It is somewhere.

    I'm going to do nothing tonight except for clean and laundry. It will feel good to just relax. I'm having a lot of people over tomorrow night and my place needs to be in A-game form. Being that I'm recently single, tomorrow night should offer some good opportunity and having a nice, clean, place only helps matters.

    I'm also in severe need of a good blowjob. Ladies, any takers?
     
    #3261 Kratos, Dec 30, 2010
  2. Nettdata

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    Mr. Toast

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    I've spent most of the day swapping snow tires onto my truck, replacing busted wheel studs, and doing rear wheel brakes on my truck.

    In -10 degree fucking weather.

    It got so cold that my coffee iced over.

    Thinking I was smart, I grabbed an old wheel spacer I had for my car, and threw the oxy at it. Got it nice and cherry red, just like that Star Trek episode. Then put my metal coffee mug on it. Warmed it right the fuck up, and I was proud of my flash of MacGuyverishness.

    Until I realized that the mug had welded itself to the spacer. It was a coffee mug with a 5 lbs metal coaster attached.

    Great.

    More heat, coaster was removed.

    The mug might be a little melted and not quite level any more, but it's still water tight.

    Mission accomplished.
     
    #3262 Nettdata, Dec 30, 2010
  3. Juice

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    Moderately Gender Fluid

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    I have had one startling realization this week.

    I absolutely cannot keep up with my girlfriend's 60 year old Sicilian father in drinking beer and red wine.

    Shame on me.
     
    #3263 Juice, Dec 30, 2010
  4. Nettdata

    Nettdata
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    Mr. Toast

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    That's like saying that you lost the marathon to the African tribesman who runs down his meals.

    You never had a chance.

    He's been training constantly since birth, as has his family for generations before him.
     
    #3264 Nettdata, Dec 30, 2010
  5. Diablo

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    Sad, sad day. I'm sitting here on my laptop, my mom is sitting next to me on her laptop looking at netflix movies, and my dad is in his recliner on his laptop AND iphone emailing something.

    And by the way, what assholes from spell check decided that iphone is spelled wrong until it is capitalized? Douchebags.
     
    #3265 Diablo, Dec 30, 2010
  6. Crown Royal

    Crown Royal
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    Just call me Topher

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    Trying to outdrink an old Italian is threading beads with no knot on the string.

    And in case I forget because of how trashed I will be tomorrow,

    Happy New Year.

    [​IMG]
     
    #3266 Crown Royal, Dec 30, 2010
  7. NotYourAverage

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    Village Idiot

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    Playing New Vegas is a totally acceptable way to spend NYE, right guys?

    Does it help that I also plan to assemble the gingerbread house kit that my parent's sent me for Christmas but didn't get here until today because the post workers were on strike...again?
     
    #3267 NotYourAverage, Dec 30, 2010
  8. Crown Royal

    Crown Royal
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    Just call me Topher

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    You should set up the gingerbread house with little gingerbread men, then set it on fire like a burning school house. Film it, making sure to zoom in on the little, screaming burning gingerbread children. Then, send the tape to your parents telling their lazy asses to send it assembled next time.
     
    #3268 Crown Royal, Dec 30, 2010
  9. PIMPTRESS

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    oooh, Their little gumdrop eyes melting in their faces, sounds like the best thank you ecard ever.
     
    #3269 PIMPTRESS, Dec 30, 2010
  10. Diablo

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    Make it a congratulations on your new baby card and send it to Bluedog, he'll get a kick out of it.

    And on a separate note, Margarita time!!!
     
    #3270 Diablo, Dec 30, 2010
  11. Noahh

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    The horror!

    [​IMG]
     
    #3271 Noahh, Dec 30, 2010
  12. PIMPTRESS

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    This goes good with my wine and candlelight...
     
    #3272 PIMPTRESS, Dec 30, 2010
    Last edited by a moderator: Mar 27, 2015
  13. PIMPTRESS

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    There should be more red icing...could we make it a suicide gingerbread bomber? All stoked about his cookie virgins..
     
    #3273 PIMPTRESS, Dec 30, 2010
  14. BadBrains

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    "Run, run, as fast as you can! You can't catch me I'm the... oh fuck, I'm on fire.."

    I'm off to enjoy my alcohol-free* activities, including fucking with my new guitar and not building a gingerbread house.

    *Alcohol-free blows more ass than a Philippine prostitute.
     
    #3274 BadBrains, Dec 30, 2010
  15. PIMPTRESS

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    I have a really nice system...huh. I guess all the man's attention to wiring and such is warranted.


    edited to add:

    What have you done for me lately?

     
    #3275 PIMPTRESS, Dec 30, 2010
    Last edited by a moderator: Mar 27, 2015
  16. NotYourAverage

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    Maybe a gingerbread double wide, complete with meth lab explosion?

    Exploding meth lab doubles as NYE fireworks. Win/Win
     
    #3276 NotYourAverage, Dec 30, 2010
  17. Danger Boy

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    #3277 Danger Boy, Dec 30, 2010
  18. Fernanthonies

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    Is it just me, or does it look like the gingerbread man in front there has a charred little vagina on his chest?

    Whatever. Phish's NYE run starts in less than an hour (hopefully) and I shall be watching it broadcast live on their website. I just bought some 12 year old Macallan to celebrate the event. I shall now pour myself a glass while I play with my new iPad.
     
    #3278 Fernanthonies, Dec 30, 2010
  19. PIMPTRESS

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    The gaping axe wound? Scary vag has been your experience....
     
    #3279 PIMPTRESS, Dec 30, 2010
  20. KillaKam

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    [/quote]

    Damn, I miss the Fugees.

    I have a family function I could go to tonight, but I don't feel motivated to attend. Beer might show me the answer.
     
    #3280 KillaKam, Dec 30, 2010
    Last edited by a moderator: Mar 27, 2015
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