Well how much of a threat we are is dependent on how willing she is to put out (kidding). "Serena, dont just stare it, eat it" (I know this shot is not from that scene).
I prefer the jack-of-all-trades response, just gain a knowledge and engage people on their interests while being interested. Like, I know very little about cars and so I ask questions of auto-lovers, and they respond, and I go, "Interesting!" The whole pressure to be a "set guy" and stay in one place is silly.
As for the question, I think the biggest problem facing guys, at least guys like me, is that I'm a man outside my time, in a lot of ways. I basically and not to sound edgy or anything, but I should probably be living in a rougher time in history than the modern times. I have a desire to do my work to the best of my ability and I have no need to thump my chest like a douchebag about it and I enjoy my work/life/hobbies for themselves, so I guess you can call me old-fashioned in that way. But nowadays, people seem to associate that sort of masculinity as silly and out-of-date. Also, it doesn't help that the chest-thumping posturing people use the whole masculinity gambit as a false cover for their bullshit, so everyone thinks you're by association a douchebag.
Jeez, I think dirty's point about emoting is a good one. Not even feeling childish or feminine when doing so, but it being perceived or deemed that by others. When it comes to women? That stupid sweet spot between putting forth "requisite" effort and being too thirsty. Hearing girls talk about a guy not putting in enough effort or not trying hard enough, but then hearing them flip and talk about guys being over the top or too needy is enough to drive a sane man fucking batty. Ive generally done well enough over the last 5-10 years so I can rationalize some stuff, but I still have moments, periods, weeks where I just don't know what the fuck the game is about anymore.
What I really hate right now is my obligation to get engaged to my girlfriend, since I'm the man. To me the constant pressure, even when its joked about, just trivializes the whole thing and is especially stupid considering the insane divorce rate today. Like "haha yeah there's basically a 50/50 chance it may go down the shitter, so WHY HAVEN'T YOU DONE IT YET you pussy?!?!". Yes, for sure. Some standards for masculinity and visions of what sort of man you're supposed to be is so stupid. For the most part I am very different in how I look and act between my 8-5 career job and the rest of my life, those two worlds don't mix much, and I feel like I am viewed and interpreted in very different ways between the two- especially if those worlds collide. Guys at the lumberyard or hunting shack will think I'm soft and clueless if they see me walk up wearing my sharp dress clothes, and similarly some people in the professional office I work in would by default look down at someone wearing old boots and dirty jeans like I do most nights. Then there's the people that will ridicule you for "trying too hard" to be masculine even you're just doing your thing and that concept hasn't crossed your mind before. I suppose women probably have their own individual versions of this too, but this is just how I feel.
It's funny how so many younger/insecure/etc people will be quick to point out and ridicule someone who doesn't fit one of those predefined "types", or feel the need to fit into one of them. I find that as I get older and understand more about life, it's those guys that people are quick to ridicule that are actually the ones who get it... they don't care what other people think, and just do what they like to do. I find myself caring less and less about what people think about "stupid" stuff, like those types. For instance, I recently bought a sewing machine from Amazon, and when it showed up at the office it was easy to see what it was. Everyone started to laugh and make light fun of me, a guy, buying a sewing machine. I laughed, and said, "yep, I just moved and I need new drapes so I'm going to make some... and hem some new pants I just bought, and I have plans to make a custom box window seat that I need cushions/upholstery for, and a couple of home-made Eames chairs, so why wouldn't I buy a sewing machine?" Most of them were actually kind of shocked that I wasn't embarrassed, and that I didn't care what they thought... and after thinking about it, they kind of went, "huh... makes sense"... but yeah, that initial knee-jerk reaction to ridicule and say "what are you, a girl?" was pretty telling. If you buy into that shit, it limits you.
I once had a guy belittle me for knowing how to cook. Like, what the fuck? How can you be proud of the fact you can't fucking even make a bowl of Kraft Mac n' Cheese? Meanwhile, I can make roasts, cook up vegetables, grill meat, etc. And the emotion thing is easy for me. If it comes up in conversation why are you crying, you say, "Not tears, liquid pride. Difference." and if the person continues to dog you threaten them with immediate physical violence. For serious though, my big takeaway is that at least where I am, men will judge you lacking in the "Manliness Dept." whereas women are more or less expecting you to not hit them with a club and drag them into your caveman lair and instead engage them as human beings with fully-developed frontal lobes and maybe only a bit of a brow-ridge on your end of things.
I know guys who more or less glory in the fact that they think they're going to have a Holly Homewife [read: Mom 2.0] who'll clean their clothes, pick up their shit and feed them and bear their children. Which is hilarious to me, because the same guy will ask how you keep getting laid/dates and you go, "Because I don't need a new parent who I can also fuck?"
How killing your potential mate help out from an early male perspective? Why would the menfolk kill the women folk they want to fuck? Im confused.
My point was that in a broadly stereotype sense, when women get super selective or picky, it may not be a reflection of the individual guy, but rather some subconscious survival mechanisms at work. I was also illustrating that all a guy has to fear (in our straightforward example), is rejection. She turns you down or worse, laughs. Statistically speaking, women (again, using broad strokes) have to fear assault or death if they make the wrong choice. So, comparatively speaking, you don't have much to worry about. Take the plunge, at worst you get shot down. Now that I've thought about it, I'd say that's another thing I'd add to the list of difficulties women face: fear of having to reject someone and hurt their feelings. Culturally we aren't often taught a way to kindly but clearly shoot someone down. And because we tend to be physically weaker, how we reject matters. So you get all kinds of maladaptive behaviours that no one likes: the cunty bitch who tells you off when you open a door. Or the chick who leads you on by smiling and being nice but disappears as soon as she can. Not saying that there aren't manipulators or bad apples out there, just that we can serve young women better by giving them tools to reject unwanted advances without risking their security. This turned way more feminazi than I'd intended. Boobs.
You fuck her, then kill her. Because if I can't have her, no one can! GET AWAY FROM HER!!! As for Nett's sewing machine story, my mom always had a sewing machine in the basement when I was growing up. When I'd rip my work jeans I'd take a piece from a pair that was completely destroyed and patch them myself. Because of this, I aced my seventh grade Home Ec class, and I'm pretty sure my teacher wanted to blow me. No seriously, it got a little creepy for a minute there. Long story short, it's saved me a lot of money over the years and there are a lot of things that you can make/fix with a sewing machine that you don't realize until you start using one. Also, guys who don't know how to operate a sewing machine are faggots. Just thought I'd throw that out there.
My Dad is an electrical engineer by trade and schooling, not nerdy but very into fixing things, teaching himself to code so he can write apps for his company, and obsessive about the 2 sports teams he follows...and also a fucking master with a sewing machine. I guess his great aunt, who he was very close with, didn't have much to entertain him with when he would visit so she taught him to sew. He made all the drapes and window dressings in our old and current house and has fixed almost any rip I have in a shirt, even the annoying ones along the seam. He hasn't hemmed any pants, but I'm sure he could. Its pretty hilarious how nonchalant it is. My Mom is very much a converted homemaker who raised 4 kids in a 25 year period, but when it comes to that, she doesn't even pretend to have expertise. I don't know about you guys, but if I get the "I wanna be Holly Homewife ASAP!" vibe from a girl, I'm running the other way like Usain Bolt.
Heh. My ex was a firefighter. She spent as much time in the garage working on our '68 Camaro as me. She was also right there with me as we built our cabin....framing, roofing, running electric...everything. She was definitely not a Holly Housewife. What I find hilarious is how many guys told me that they couldn't deal with having a girl who had a more "Manly" job then them. I worked IT, she was a firefighter/Paramedic. How insecure in yourself do you have to be to worry about that shit?
One of the things I dislike the most about being a guy is the constant pressure of "expectation". Have a decent job, you should be going after something better. Have a decent car, should be driving something nicer. Have a decent girlfriend, should be dating someone nicer. There is an underlying current to everything we do that we always should be reaching for something better.
The hardest thing about being a guy for me is that my wife makes more money and has a higher status (I.e. She's got a doctorate) while I work in a field that is still majority women and I make jack shit (teaching). If someone has to be the stay at home parent, it's me. It's always funny when I tell people that, because fuck it, I'm certainly not ashamed by it. But it makes a good litmus test to see if they are more "traditional values" or "modern values." The traditional values people will be super judgmental dicks about it. One woman at church literally pulled my wife aside and told her to divorce me so she could marry a rich man and stay home with the kids "like a good woman should." she managed to offend us BOTH with that comment.