It's snowed all night. Have about 1.5' of new snow that fell, and everything is all white and fluffy. The temperature is rising. It's expected to get up to +8° by the end of the day, and rain for the next week. Fucking moderate rain forests.
So apparently Joe Pesci is being thought of to play Silvio Berlusconi in a film about his life and bunga bunga sex parties. That film is going to be awesome.
fuuuck last night was not a good idea. This chick bartender we're "friends" with bought us five pitchers of beer last night. apparently this exchange happened sometime around midnight chick friend "She's hot from the neck down, I don't like her eyes." me "Because when I bang a girl I'm looking at her eyes..." I snuck out of her bed at 630 this morning, not one of my prouder moments in life.
And on this note, a porn film has been made of the bunga bunga scandals: <a class="postlink" href="http://teleobs.nouvelobs.com/articles/bunga-bunga-le-film-x-inspire-des-frasques-de-berlusconi" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;">http://teleobs.nouvelobs.com/articles/b ... berlusconi</a> Link is not safe for work, if your co-workers can understand Italian and French. This sure puts that Sarah Palin porn movie to shame. Oh, and this parody of that Shakira song: I think the word "Africa" is a clever play on words in Italian that means something along the lines of "pussy". What a beautiful language, indeed.
I thought I was going to have a nice, quiet day yesterday, because I was sick and had a doctor's appointment at 9 AM. Wrong. I was drinking tequila by 10 AM and almost thrown out of a bar/restaurant due to my roommate shortly after noon (apparently it is a "family establishment"). My roommate then proceeded to have a half hour mushy conversation with his girlfriend about how much he loves her while sitting in the middle of the sidewalk, cheat on said girlfriend 5 hours later, vomit all over my apartment, call his girlfriend again to tell her that he loves her, and then get taken to the hospital for drunkenness. I really don't understand how yesterday happened.
But I was the one drinking the tequila! I ended up taking a nap, sobering up, and playing video games all night while slowly drinking beer. Meanwhile, he, who had no tequila, make the clusterfuck of all clusterfucks! Oh, he also ate our other two roommates' food (before throwing it up in our hallway). So everyone is super happy with him.
Today, I completed a 53 mile training ride that had a 30 mph headwind for approximately 85% of the time. It wasn't just gusting at 30. It remained there and made life miserable. In fact, one gust came so hard that it pushed a rider off the trail, onto the dirt off to the side and he flipped over his handlebars face first into the ground. This was less a mile from the finish. He almost waved down a support vehicle to take him to the finish line, but I wouldn't let him. Not when he was that close.
I had one of those really wet sounding farts, someone asked me if I shit myself so I stuck my hand down my pants where my ass is and without inspecting put my fingers up to his nose. There was nothing on me, but like when the crafty old lion puts the cub back in its place in front of everyone, the rest of the pack knew I was not to be trifled with.
I've never been a person to drink bourbon but I do know that many of you have it as a go-to drink. I was just in the states and figured I would pick up a bottle of knob creek and give it a whirl. Now I like it neat, its even better on the rocks, but is it acceptable to mix with anything? Or is it considered too nice of a bottle for that? And if so with what, just so I can explore a bit more into this alcohol type teach me the ways of bourbon
I'm not familiar with Knob Creek, so I don't know if it's a waste to mix it or not, and don't know if it's particularly great mixed, but here are a few standard bourbon mixes: Bourbon and Coke. I prefer mine with either muddled maraschino cherries, or just a splash of the juice from the jar. Bourbon and ginger ale. Old Fashioned: bourbon, about 1-2 teaspoons of simple syrup (or a sugar cube), 2 dashes of bitters, splash of soda (that's soda water, not cola) Manhattan: bourbon, sweet vermouth, and a dash of bitter. The ratio of bourbon to vermouth can go anywhere from about 3:1, to just a small splash of vermouth. I prefer a Perfect Manhattan, which has equal parts sweet and dry vermouth. Bourbon Cobbler = bourbon, ginger ale, whole slice of orange, slice of lemon, cherry. BL1Y's Very Special Bourbon Recipe That Is NOT Called a "Tire Swing" No Matter What That Jerk Ryan Insisted On Naming It: muddle lemon, mint, and simple syrup, then add bourbon and unsweet tea. If you only have sweet tea, leave out the simple syrup. For a fast and easy version, just do bourbon, sweet tea, and a small splash of peppermint schnapps/rumple. Edit: These are all served over ice, except the Manhattan, which should be shaken and served up. Another Edit: The Old Fashioned has to be served with an orange slice and 1-2 cherries.
The academy awards always force me to drink way too many beers way to long into Sunday night. I might just have to have yet one more to watch this. The wife loves it so I have no choice to turn the channel.
My Twitter has been getting filled up with people discussing the Oscars. No one is discussing the "academy awards." I wonder how Twitter's character limit will affect branding/marketing in the future. More short names and slogans in the future?
Really? Not 'Gift Shop', OR 'Restrepo'? Chug dicks, Hollywood. Chug dicks hard. Of course this is the first fucking politicized speech of the night. Fuck you in your facepussy, you twatty fuck. Shut the fuck up and take your man-statue.