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The EPIC Turkey Day.. ZOMG & THE EPIC XMAS D.T BOOM ROASTED!

Discussion in 'General Discussion' started by Frank, Nov 21, 2011.

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  1. comforter

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    Re: The EPIC Turkey Day Drunk Thread

    Quantity has a quality all its own, as Joe Stalin said.

    Unrelated, but I doubt you'll complain:

    [​IMG]
     
    #181 comforter, Nov 23, 2011
  2. uzisuicide

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    Re: The EPIC Turkey Day Drunk Thread

    So I've come down with a sore throat. I also have honey, lemon juice, whiskey, and assorted other herbs/spices in the house. Any suggestions on a good mixture to cure my ailment?
     
    #182 uzisuicide, Nov 23, 2011
  3. Frank

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    Re: The EPIC Turkey Day Drunk Thread

    Chug the whiskey, squirt the lemon juice in your eye and put the honey on your balls near a beehive. If nothing else the soar throat won't bother you anymore.
     
    #183 Frank, Nov 23, 2011
  4. ssycko

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    Re: The EPIC Turkey Day Drunk Thread

    Nothing I've ever seen before describes me so perfectly:

    [​IMG]
     
    #184 ssycko, Nov 23, 2011
  5. Crown Royal

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    Re: The EPIC Turkey Day Drunk Thread

    You, or Calvin & Hobbes.
     
    #185 Crown Royal, Nov 23, 2011
  6. bewildered

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    Re: The EPIC Turkey Day Drunk Thread

    Lentil turkey burgers are ok, but I think I overdid it with the lentils. I have a whole bowl of that crap, raw, in the fridge.
     
    #186 bewildered, Nov 23, 2011
  7. uzisuicide

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    Re: The EPIC Turkey Day Drunk Thread

    Shot of whiskey, teaspoon of lemon juice, and a tablespoon of honey. My throat still hurts. Maybe I'll try a double dose. Or a triple....yeah, maybe a quadruple dose will help me out.
     
    #187 uzisuicide, Nov 23, 2011
  8. StayFrosty

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    Re: The EPIC Turkey Day Drunk Thread

    You want to forget about a sore throat? Go jab the back of your hand, between the metacarpals, with a rigid object. Every time you use your hand, your throat will feel immensely better.
     
    #188 StayFrosty, Nov 23, 2011
  9. jordan_paul

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    Re: The EPIC Turkey Day Drunk Thread

    I actually prefer Yellow 77.

    <a class="postlink" href="http://www.idealindustries.com/media/img/products/wire_installation/product/yellow_77.jpg" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;">http://www.idealindustries.com/media/im ... low_77.jpg</a>
     
    #189 jordan_paul, Nov 23, 2011
  10. MoreCowbell

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    Re: The EPIC Turkey Day Drunk Thread

    I literally hate everything about Amtrak. Even the things that might be good (WiFi!) are ruined (Except we block completely kosher sites, like Pandora!).
     
    #190 MoreCowbell, Nov 23, 2011
  11. shimmered

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    Re: The EPIC Turkey Day Drunk Thread

    The Guy is going to his mother's house for Thanksgiving. I have absolutely ZERO interest in participating in this event. Like...nonewhatsomotherfuckingever...and somehow, I'm the asshole for this.
    His mother hates me.
    She thinks I'm after him for his money.
    Like...she legitimately does NOT LIKE ME. At all.
    Wtf would I want to spend the holiday with her for?

    Fuck that shit.

    I'm not even spending the day with my OWN family, and I LIKE them. I'm going to stay home and get drunk, just like I did last year. AFter I coach a Thanksgiving Day CrossFit class, I'm going to go home and do my damnedest to set up my Christmas tree while knocking back the booze.
     
    #191 shimmered, Nov 23, 2011
  12. MoreCowbell

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    Re: The EPIC Turkey Day Drunk Thread

    Oh my god. The two broads next to me are giving running commentaries as they read OK! and US Weekly magazine. I'm on this train for two more hours. This will require much beer.
     
    #192 MoreCowbell, Nov 23, 2011
  13. zyron

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    Re: The EPIC Turkey Day Drunk Thread

    Just start staring at them till they shut up. Don't break eye contact at all.
     
    #193 zyron, Nov 23, 2011
  14. Thorgouge

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    Re: The EPIC Turkey Day Drunk Thread

    And lick your lips every so often.
     
    #194 Thorgouge, Nov 23, 2011
  15. bewildered

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    Re: The EPIC Turkey Day Drunk Thread

    Fart a couple times, I think that will surprise them into silence or, best case scenario, make them move.
     
    #195 bewildered, Nov 23, 2011
  16. $100T2

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    Re: The EPIC Turkey Day Drunk Thread

    Find your closest Thai restaurant. Get Spicy Chicken Fried Rice. Have them up it from the "one pepper" or "two pepper" spicy rating to four peppers.

    Eat it.

    Chug the whiskey.

    Problem solved.
     
    #196 $100T2, Nov 23, 2011
  17. $100T2

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    Re: The EPIC Turkey Day Drunk Thread

    By the way... When you've had zero rum for 2 months because of the gym, the rum you allow yourself because of a random holiday you don't particularly like (mostly because you have to spend it with your wifes family...) hits you like a phucking phreight train.


    Yes, I spelled it like that just because phreight made me giggle.

    Rum, bitches! Ruuuuuuum.
     
    #197 $100T2, Nov 23, 2011
  18. Gravitas

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    Re: The EPIC Turkey Day Drunk Thread

    what. the. fuck.

    [​IMG]
     
    #198 Gravitas, Nov 23, 2011
  19. $100T2

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    Re: The EPIC Turkey Day Drunk Thread

    Who else thinks when your mother-in-law says, "It's time to trim the tree!!!" you're wondering if you need to shave your pubes a bit???
     
    #199 $100T2, Nov 23, 2011
  20. $100T2

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    Re: The EPIC Turkey Day Drunk Thread

    Heard about the new holiday drive, "Toys for Twats"???

    [​IMG]
     
    #200 $100T2, Nov 23, 2011
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