The EPIC Turkey Day.. ZOMG & THE EPIC XMAS D.T BOOM ROASTED!

If you get an erection, it's okay.

 

Sack...

 

That rep was me, the former carrymehome. I don't hate screen names, regardless of how douchey they can be at times. It's like that Louis CK bit about standing behind some random person at the post office and hating on them for fun. It's fun to hate on ballsack when he's being a douche, or Hooker/ when she's being an attention whore (I only do this in PMs/Reps to people other than Hooker. Hi Hooker or Queen-Bee for being a relentlessly drunken cougar (I actually don't ever do this, because QB is the shit). All those people are probably alright in real life. It's the internet, Crown. It's not real.

 

The internet IS real, goddamn it! And I won't rest until everybody in the entire universe thinks exactly like I do. It's not my fault, it's just that every person on earth but me has their head up their ass and if only they were more open-minded they would realize this.

The "thing" about Ballsack didn't bother me, I only wanted to know WHY the hatred for the guy because I find that he and his arch-nemesis Allord (who has been MIA for a year) to be probably the funniest fucks on here. I just wanted to know the origin of the hate. You know, like how when you come across some idiotic inexcusable traffic hold-up and the first though on your mind in to get to the front the mess so you can find out who's responsible.

BOOM! POSTED.

 

Asshole bleaching is done by painting bleach on your asshole.

....is that enough of a deterrent for women to avoid doing such a thing? No. Why don't they call spas what they ACTUALLY are: Inquisition torture chambers. They peel skin off your bodies, rip hairs from your legs and naughty girl parts, and spackle your back door with contact-corrosive chemicals all the while the sadistic Asian women are laughing at each other in their home languages on how much they like inflicting pain for money on stupid rich western bitches. However, they have bamboo and are Feng Shui oriented, so they are spas.

Look, if it (your asshole) looks like a wink from a dude that picked a fight and lost, have at it. Clorox 2 the shit for all I care, but you CANNOT explain any other reason for doing this and expect me to keep a straight face during so.

 

Is this WDT random crazy talk or do you really believe this horseshit?

 

Question for the Idiots, we're all drunken layabouts of varying degrees.

In Australia there are drive through bottle shops and at one stage there was an alcohol delivery service but I think they got shut down. I know New Zealand has nothing drive through but what about the US or Canada? Are drive through bottle shops just not allowed or has no one bothered to start up a chain yet because I can see a massive market for it.

I mean come on who doesn't love being able to drive through the shop and get your alcohol without even getting out of the car.

 

I've wanted to kill Juila Roberts for years, but I can't because in turn I would be killed by every woman in her 40's that's never had a successful relationship.

 

Ugh. Fuck sinus congestion. I'm going through tissues faster than a 13-year-old boy with the crack code to the Playboy channel.

Also, word to the wise: Always keep unscented antibacterial soap around, lest your sex toys end up smelling disconcertingly like caramel apples.

We have Dial-A-Bottle, but (at least Ontario) does not have drive-thru beer/liquor stores. Quebec might. They're a feisty bunch.

 

I don't think there are any in New Orleans, but there were in Tennessee and Georgia when I lived there.

New Orleans does have the drive through daiquiri shop. Which is basically a drive through bar.

 

I thought it would have been huge over your way. Had a marine mate I took through one when they were doing a joint exercise in July and he was amazed we had them. They're one of the best things ever, make it so much more convenient.

 

I've seen drive-though liquor stores in Michigan, my city London has ONE Beer Store (the name of the store) with a drive-thru but you can't get out of your car, and have to let the employees load it in your trunk. I know Texas at least USED to have quite a few drive-thru booze shops, but I don't know anymore.

The most loved store in Canada:

 

Is that on that street with the pawn shops, sex shops and Money Marts? Because I can understand the appeal of not wanting to leave the car in that stretch of London.

I'm actually shocked. I didn't think they did drive-thru liquor sales of any kind in this province. Way to be progressive, London.

 

Really, where at? When I was in school, I made a half-assed attempt at trying to make one happen and was told no way in hell. It was in a college town, so I had little prospects to start with since the liquor licenses were practically impossible to come by.

 

I wish it was socially acceptable to drink wine out of sippy cups. Then I could have my wine AND lie down. I might also seem like kind of an alcoholic. Stupid societal norms.

 

Girls, ladies, women: Did you ever wonder why it's called the "Black Cherry?"
It's not supposed to be the same color as the rest of your skin. None of the skin "down there*" is supposed to be; it's totally different skin that excretes liquids. That's how things are supposed to work.

*By "Down there," I meant to say Vagina, anus, perineum, labia majora and minora. If you've got a problem with those terms... Well, you've got a problem.

Also, I never understood why everyone hated on Ballsack. He wasn't any worse that any of the other members on the old board. That hatred carried over to here, and I still don't understand it.
If I had to speculate on a reason why he was so demonized to begin with, I'd guess that he pissed off one of the sandy-vaginaed moderators on the old board. Those people would go out of their way to try and make a fool of someone over the slightest percieved offense (Ex: poorly drawn cartoons.).

Now here's an awesome Pontiac that I saw earlier today:

 

If IASIP has taught us anything, wine in a Diet Coke can is the way to go.

 

I just had one of my occasional moments of absolute stupidity. After reading about gingivitis and periodontitis, I thought I might try brushing my teeth with just a bit of hydrogen peroxide. So I mostly fill a cup with water, splash in some peroxide, and start brushing oh so gently. Except the taste is wrong somehow, and the unmistakable smell of HP is missing....

...because this guy had a fucking idiot moment and tried brushing with diluted rubbing alcohol. An open wound in my mouth (thank God there wasn't) would have served me right.

 

North Texas is sketchy for that. I even heard the dope growin' cousins bitching about it at Christmas; yet again.

South Texas? They are everywhere.

EDIT: Although, no where near as impresssive as that.