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The EPIC Turkey Day.. ZOMG & THE EPIC XMAS D.T BOOM ROASTED!

Discussion in 'General Discussion' started by Frank, Nov 21, 2011.

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  1. Bundy Bear

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    And they all talk about equality. Fuck that noise, I'm not a cute girl so I'm boned before I began and not in the way I should be.
     
    #5681 Bundy Bear, Dec 31, 2011
  2. katokoch

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    And I just saw one for Cougar dating or something like that.

    I picked up six stouts and porters I've never seen before and a lil bottle of Woodford Reserve for tonight (to balance the jello shots and shitty vodka). One of my girlfriend's friends got a few hotel rooms near the Plaza in KC so we're gonna have a good time tonight.

    The only downside for tonight is my girlfriend being on her period. No sex for me! God dammit.
     
    #5682 katokoch, Dec 31, 2011
  3. StayFrosty

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    I just got an ad for ThaiLoveSingles. Now who's going to buy me a new pair of pants?
     
    #5683 StayFrosty, Dec 31, 2011
  4. scootah

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    Happy new year jackals. Just winding down after a pretty awesome party at my house. Somewhere between 60 and 70 people through the door. I'm going to be seedy as fuck when I wake up.
     
    #5684 scootah, Dec 31, 2011
  5. bewildered

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    Did they all take their breathalyzer test as they exited?
     
    #5685 bewildered, Dec 31, 2011
  6. Rush-O-Matic

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    Did "Asian Lesbian Torture" get any green dots? I'm afraid to click on that thread. Oh, wait. Maybe that's not a Spam thread.
     
    #5686 Rush-O-Matic, Dec 31, 2011
  7. audreymonroe

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    The most powerful cervix... in the world...

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    I have a feeling 2012 is going to be a good year, but I also have an equally strong feeling that I could just as likely wind up doing a Liz Lemon and doing my version of eating ham while sitting on the floor in a wedding dress I brought on sale.
     
    #5687 audreymonroe, Dec 31, 2011
  8. Nom Chompsky

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    I thought more about who would play people on the TiB show (based on personality and looks), and here's what I came up with. I WOULD WATCH THE FUCK OUT OF THIS SHOW.


    Morecowbell would be played by:

    [​IMG]

    I think they graduated from the same school, and they're both white guys. It's perfect.

    Pinkcup:

    [​IMG]

    Ghetto:

    [​IMG]

    Ballsack:

    [​IMG]
     
    #5688 Nom Chompsky, Dec 31, 2011
  9. Nom Chompsky

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    What would Edward Cullen Do?
     
    #5689 Nom Chompsky, Dec 31, 2011
  10. Crown Royal

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    Just call me Topher

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    Who's the dude with the toilet seat hair playing Ballsack? Really I don't know.

    I have started drinking earlier than I expected, on the other hand I feel I ought to.

    The dude in front of me at the liquor store today had two popped collars and was buying four bottles of Hypnotiq,and he wasn't even trying to shield his face while doing so. Jesus. If you were any more metrosexual Brody Jenner would apply to YOUR friend.
     
    #5690 Crown Royal, Dec 31, 2011
  11. Rush-O-Matic

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    That's Tony Hale - Buster Bluth, from Arrested Development.
     
    #5691 Rush-O-Matic, Dec 31, 2011
  12. katokoch

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    Skip to :15 for my reaction...



    Sex during the period doesn't bother me, but when she says no, I'm not gonna argue. Red wings? No fucking way, never.
     
    #5692 katokoch, Dec 31, 2011
    Last edited by a moderator: Mar 27, 2015
  13. Flat_Rate

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    Re: Re: The EPIC Turkey Day.. ZOMG & THE EPIC XMAS D.T BOOM ROAS



    Speaking of red wings, my cousin came down from upstairs at a house party drunk as fuck with coagulated blood stuck all over his face and beard. He proceeds to pour himself a drink and set down next to me, doesn't mention the blood at all, just starts shooting the shit.

    Everyone there just kind of stood around in silence until he picked up on it, then he looked in the mirror. The look on his face was priceless, he told me later that he wondered what tasted like iron when he was going down on his old lady.
     
    #5693 Flat_Rate, Dec 31, 2011
    Last edited by a moderator: Mar 27, 2015
  14. Juice

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    Been in the ER for the last four hours with the girlfriend after I had to call an ambulance for her.

    Fuck this day is shitty.
     
    #5694 Juice, Dec 31, 2011
  15. mya

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    Dang, that sounds serious. How do you go from "the girlfriend is sick" to "I had to call am ambulance"? Is all OK????
     
    #5695 mya, Dec 31, 2011
  16. Diablo

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    I hope everything gets better for you juice, anything with the hospital is never good.

    On a lighter note, my friends and I are doing some kind of new years costume...one's going as a masquerade ball, another is a new years baby, and another is old man time...any suggestions for me?
     
    #5696 Diablo, Dec 31, 2011
  17. Gravitas

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    Mayan priest/shaman dude.
     
    #5697 Gravitas, Dec 31, 2011
  18. mya

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    Dick Clark?
     
    #5698 mya, Dec 31, 2011
  19. Juice

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    I can't wait to him stroke out through the countdown tonight.

    On a better note, the girlfriend is getting discharged. She had passed out and began throwing up when she came to and shit her pants; prompting me to call 911. They pumped her full of fluid and now I look forward to mopping up any residue on the bathroom floor. Oh well, she's worth it and I'm an awesome boyfriend.

    I better get a decent blowjob for all this. You after after she brushes the vomit from her teeth...

    Happy New Year, Tibers!
     
    #5699 Juice, Dec 31, 2011
  20. StayFrosty

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    Glad she's feeling better, but fuck that. Pretty sure brushing without rinsing first is bad for the enamel, and regardless, your mouth still feels acidy and gritty even after brushing.

    Point is, fuck vomiting.

    Also:

     
    #5700 StayFrosty, Dec 31, 2011
    Last edited by a moderator: Mar 27, 2015
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