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The EPIC Turkey Day.. ZOMG & THE EPIC XMAS D.T BOOM ROASTED!

Discussion in 'General Discussion' started by Frank, Nov 21, 2011.

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  1. TX.

    TX.
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    The Mad Pooper

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    Word. That's gross. I'm just thinking, "who do I have to blow to get an appointment?" maybe it's worth the gross moufs.
     
    #6441 TX., Jan 5, 2012
  2. Binary

    Binary
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    Your ideas are intriguing to me and I wish to subscribe to your newsletter.
     
    #6442 Binary, Jan 5, 2012
  3. GTE

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    Agreed. Back then they didn't even have "middle school". It was grades K-8 in one room.
     
    #6443 GTE, Jan 5, 2012
  4. zyron

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    Something for the ladies:



    I bet this song was playing on the beach.

     

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    #6444 zyron, Jan 5, 2012
    Last edited by a moderator: Mar 27, 2015
  5. Parker

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    Well I don't think it warrants its own thread and don't want to waste a topic there, but hey this is the drunk thread, even though I'm at work I should be drinking...so let me walk down to my office's cooler...
    Shipments every week...
     

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    #6445 Parker, Jan 5, 2012
  6. Nom Chompsky

    Nom Chompsky
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    Honorary TiBette

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    I wouldn't be so impressed by this if I didn't know that you worked from home.
     
    #6446 Nom Chompsky, Jan 5, 2012
  7. The Village Idiot

    The Village Idiot
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    Porn Worthy, Bitches

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    Typical conversation in the VI household:

    (comes back from having a smoke, greeted by Dahlia)

    "You look sneaky. You look like you've done something."
    Dahlia wags.
    "I don't trust you."
    Dahlia wags.
    "I know you did somethi....oh, YOU'RE SO CUTE"

    I then proceed to shower Dahlia with praise and affection. But she's still a sneaky little (well, big, she's up to 80 lbs) bitch.
     
    #6447 The Village Idiot, Jan 5, 2012
  8. Parker

    Parker
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    Haha, I work downtown Chicago, at an ad agency. The kicker is, I definitely have zero reason to be in a goddamn office to do my job that is entirely online.
     
    #6448 Parker, Jan 5, 2012
  9. The Village Idiot

    The Village Idiot
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    Porn Worthy, Bitches

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    Heh, a bit of a milestone.

    Over 100 resumes sent, not one reply!
     
    #6449 The Village Idiot, Jan 5, 2012
  10. Rush-O-Matic

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    Two questions for TiB here in the ol' WDT:

    1. Why do toilet seats in stalls in men's rooms* have the front section missing? Is it supposed to be so when you drip, it falls on the bowl and not the seat? So, the next person to sit doesn't sit on piss? Because every seat that doesn't get raised has piss all over it anyway. That seems like a pretty dumb upgrade from your standard oval.

    2. Do you have to be stoned out of your mind to understand this song and video? Or is it just supposed to be art?



    *I don't go in ladies' rooms, so I have no idead if they have this feature. Or, for that matter, why they have toilets with lids that raise at all.
     
    #6450 Rush-O-Matic, Jan 5, 2012
    Last edited by a moderator: Mar 27, 2015
  11. bewildered

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    Our toilets are like that too.
     
    #6451 bewildered, Jan 5, 2012
  12. audreymonroe

    audreymonroe
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    The most powerful cervix... in the world...

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    I've had an awkward afternoon on the phone.

    First, I was inspired by the late night trip to the sex shop Nom, Ghetto, and I took at our mini-meetup, and I decided to round up all of the numbers of the least creepy stores in the city to ask if they were hiring. Nothing terribly awkward, but still funny to call 8 sex shops in rapid succession to tell them I wanted to work there. "Hello this is Shag." "Hello this is Honey." "Hello this is the Pleasure Chest." "Hello this is Babeland." Etc.

    Then, my dad is turning 60 next month, and his girlfriend and I are planning a surprise birthday party for him. I did the invitations today, so I spent a few hours calling these people I haven't seen since I was in middle school usually and awkwardly catching up. But I'm really excited, and I think it's going to work out nicely. His oldest friend who lives in Seattle might even be coming.

    Finally, right after those calls ended, I got a call to schedule an interview with Planned Parenthood, and one of her questions was something like "Many of the calls you'll be receiving to schedule appointments are for abortions. Is that something you're comfortable with?" And I was like "YES. DEFINITELY." And I think I sounded a little bit too excited about abortions.
     
    #6452 audreymonroe, Jan 5, 2012
  13. Frank

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    I always just thought they were that way so if someone peeing while standing didn't lift the seat, damage would be minimized.
     
    #6453 Frank, Jan 5, 2012
  14. GTE

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    I think its for fatties. When I first moved out my roommate was a big dude (6'3" 325) and he "upgraded" to one of those style seats
     
    #6454 GTE, Jan 5, 2012
  15. lust4life

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    That's subjective. Costello's Trust and Imperial Bedroom, The Clash's Sandinista and Combat Rock (and London Calling was released 12/79), and Springsteen's The River and Born in the USA (his first two albums to reach #1). Their 70s releases were great, don't get me wrong, but they continued to produce excellent music in the 80s and, except for The Clash, well beyond.

    And I don't know if I'm more depressed by the fact that Steve Lawrence had the #1 hit when I was born, or the fact that maybe 3 people on TIB know who the hell Steve Lawrence is/was.
     
    #6455 lust4life, Jan 5, 2012
  16. Jimmy James

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    I can't be the first one that saw Nom's Twitter handle and said, "Dong Lover Beef? What the fuck, man? Oh, wait. It's Nom."
     
    #6456 Jimmy James, Jan 5, 2012
  17. Bundy Bear

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    Just woke up to cook a couple of sausages and eggs and sit here and watch Sachin Tendulkar put on a master class of batting in the cricket. Hopefully he stays in all day and gets his 100th international century.

    And for all of you who understand none of this, bite me.
     
    #6457 Bundy Bear, Jan 5, 2012
  18. Kubla Kahn

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    Im still not convinced he isn't Skyello pulling a prank as a black hipster/LGBT second account.
     
    #6458 Kubla Kahn, Jan 5, 2012
  19. ghettoastronaut

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    #6459 ghettoastronaut, Jan 5, 2012
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  20. Noland

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    What were Paul Simon and Julio doing down by that schoolyard?
     
    #6460 Noland, Jan 5, 2012
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