The EPIC Turkey Day.. ZOMG & THE EPIC XMAS D.T BOOM ROASTED!

In that it assumes that people cheat because of institutional failures of marriage, confusion about intentions, etc. rather than because they saw an opportunity and only cared about themselves. Maybe I'm casting you as overly pessimistic, but on other topics (crime comes to mind), I seem to remember you saying that lots of people were shitty and opportunistic. I'm surprised that you wouldn't ascribe plenty of cheating to dicks being dicks.

Sure, sometimes needs are being met. But sometimes this need is a childish "I want everything and I want it now."

 

I'm kinda surprised you haven't.

 

Me too.

Maybe I have and didn't know it.

 

yes?

And Nom, the HuffPo is mostly garbage.

 

To those that support open relationships, are you arguing that it is the more logical of the two and society should catch up? If so, and am not trying to suggest you are or are not, I disagree. I think every person defines a committed relationship differently. For some, monogamous sex is not a prerequisite, for others like myself, it is. There is no right or wrong answer, and certainly, as the article seems to suggest, open relationships aren't the best way to go to ensure a successful relationship. They are not the worst; they are simply one way.

I'll use myself as an example of the logic of some proponents/practitioners of monogamy. Since we started dating, my wife and I have only had sex with each other. It is something intensely intimate which we only share with each other. There only a few other things that reflect that level of closeness between us. For us, it is good to have things like this that are only for each other. I couldn't accept in my head my wife being with someone else because that extremely intimate part of our relationship would no longer be so. But again, this is just how my brain is wired. I understand and am fine that others define their relationship differently and believe it to be perfectly normal. It's not any more or less logical than monogamy.

 

It wouldn't bother me as long as we agreed upon it beforehand.

 

Biologically speaking, yes.

 

There's two guys I'd bang: Tim Tebow and Fight Club era Brad Pitt.

Also, TRIPLE POST.

 

Kind of getting off topic. But kudos for saying straight up that you would bang ANY other guy. As someone else mentioned it seems a lot more difficult thing for a lot of hetero sexual males to come to terms with. Hell I know there is no way short of the loss of my favorite appendage, or life that I would be down for a homosexual encounter* under any circumstances. Not that there is anything wrong with male homosexual relationships, just not my bag baby. Hell I recall on the RMMB there was a thread where I stated pretty strongly that if I slept with a transgendered woman who did not disclose this fact before hand, I would be pissed the hell off. Once again what a person chooses to do with their body, and who they consensually choose to do it with is completely their business, but I just could never wrap my head around knowingly having sex with a person who is currently, or was born a man.

Now I have a question. And I hope you in no way perceive this as mockery, or a joke, because it is not intended that way. But would you consider yourself bi-curious? Or are you more of the mindset that you are 99.999% straight, but if a highly unlikely scenario presented itself you would be willing to experiment for a few hours? And if the latter is the case, how do you wrap your brain around it? Because honestly just seeing homoerotic images skeeves me out, let alone seriously contemplating acting out a homosexual encounter.

*The guy/guy Bugs Bunny kiss, especially when one party isn't expecting it is ALWAYS funny.

 

Interesting points Big. My thoughts of semi-related. I have no problem with thinking guys are attractive, my friends joke about my man-crushes on people, I respect the physical attractiveness of both people. But when I seriously look at it or think about it, I couldn't even make out with a guy, much less hook up. Its not a fear issue, its not revulsion, its just a physical disconnect.

 

You guys don't think that a huge part of this is what society has drilled in to you?

Women are encouraged to explore hooking up with other girls; it's seen as desirable and attractive. Men are derided and mocked for even a hint of homosexuality/bicuriosity, at least in most places. I would suggest that maybe if society were a little friendlier towards the idea of you (men in general) kissing a guy/hooking up with a guy just to explore the boundaries of what feels good, your personal feelings might shift as well.

I know that I have absolutely no interest in women sexually, but have hooked up with a couple of girls just because the opportunity presented itself and, fuck, why not? If I were going to be ridiculed for doing so, I would certainly not have stepped into those situations.

 

Jwags and rachiii are spitting that fire right now

 

People often make the mistake of thinking that there are three distinct categories: Heterosexual, Bisexual, and Homosexual. But that's as ridiculous as any other attempt to simplify human interactions. The Kinsey Scale is wide and deep (rawr), and to think it's all black and white is just silly. Every person falls somewhere within that scale, and there are great big swaths of territory between straight and bi, bi and gay, and very few people are totally all the way to one extreme or the other, or even dead center.

Everything else is learned societal behavior. Before our beloved religious texts of the last 2000 years, all manner of homosexual behaviors were normal and without stigma. Egypt and Sparta and Babylon and Greece and Rome, and on and on and on, it was simply a part of life. But it doesn't produce more Christians, or more Muslims, or more Jews, and so it was declared "an abomination in the eyes of the Lord."

And once those leaders pulled off the amazing trick of convincing people that everything would be better after they were dead, getting them to stone fags to death was child's play.

 

I respect what you're saying rachii. But I'll put it this way, even more to the point.

My roommate's younger brother is gay and happens to be one of my best friends. Super comfortable with his sexuality, non invasive, etc... Anyways, at his urging I went to a gay bar one night. Not a super obnoxious Hydrate type place, more laid back, almost divey. I proceeded to get decently drunk to further power down my natural defenses if any existed. You know the drunk where making out with everyone, even girls you normally aren't interested in but today look just right, seems like a good idea? Yeah I was there. And even still, in the most comfortable of places sans judgement, I couldn't do it despite willing participants.

Is it a societal construct? Perhaps, but at the same time, I think its biological. Society wants me to think runway models are hot but I think they look like coked out giraffes and Hollywood wanted me to lust after Miley Cyrus once she turned 18, but I wasn't and still am not into misbehaved chipmunks.

 

Honestly, I never really put much thought into it. I mean I wouldn't reject a blowjob from Brad Pitt, but until I'm put into a situation like that I'll never know for sure.

 

Society and biology intermingle like bodily fluids dripping onto tangled sheets.

No homo.

 

You know, I have been asked this question quite a few times, and every time I have genuinely considered it. But I still don't think it has anything to do with societal pressure. It is a genuine physical and mental discomfort with even the idea of the act. And while I consider myself fairly self analytical, no I can't say for sure social norms have nothing to do with it, but I intrinsically feel it's not the case. Most of the things I have any curiosity about at all sexually I have tried at least once. And homosexuality just doesn't make the list. I've been offered quite a few times, and I'm sure most of the people that have made advances would be the souls of discretion. However I just can't find myself ever feeling comfortable or in anyway sexually stimulated from the experience.

I do my utmost not to allow social preconceptions dictate my actions. Hell most of my friends say I'm one of the whitest people they know. Both mockingly, and as a compliment. (Funnily enough when it is meant as a compliment it pisses me off more.) And I get jokes like that because I have striven for a long while now to be as faithful to my personality, education, and morals as I can be. And the person I try to be has no need to be anything less than he is. Weather it be in my speech, how I present myself, or how I treat others, I do my best to let the man in the mirror guide my actions. Not saying I'm always successful, but that is the life I try to live.

Honestly if I felt that I was disturbed by the thought of personally engaging in homosexuality because society said it was a 'no-no' I would be genuinely upset with myself. I would truly hope that I have enough internal awareness to distinguish any homosexual desires. And more importantly to act on them if I did.

 

I think you're all very sweet but if you think you're not being affected by the way society reacts to homosexuality you're being incredibly naive.

Just consider the opposite case. How many girls "experiment" by making out with other girls and so on just because they've basically been told that's hot/acceptable/girlish fun? So many that there are OKCupid questions about it! Of course society plays a HUGE role in this.

And that's all I'm going to say on the topic.

 

I'm going to carry a conversation I'm having with a friend over here. It's a two-parter:

1. Guys, what number of men would a girl have to have slept with for you to react negatively, like "Woah...she's slept with a lot of guys"? Girls?

2. What factors do you use to determine sluttiness? Is it number of people they've slept with, general attitude towards sex, the circumstances they tend to have sex in, or what?

Like whoever brought up the HuffPo article, I'm not sure if this is enough to warrant an entire thread. But I'm curious what other people have to say. We both have wildly different guesses for number 1.