The EPIC Turkey Day.. ZOMG & THE EPIC XMAS D.T BOOM ROASTED!

It's true. Even when the job is a gym.

Ideally, we could say "Hey. Dude. Your shoes are killin' us. Ew. Change them." and it wouldn't go over like shit in the sandbox. Unfortunately, probably not.

The Guy has decided he really likes our new kitty. He's making her a giant kitty playground tomorrow, with carpet and rope and different levels for her to play on. It's going to be rad.

 

A friend of a friend of a friend somehow won a free hour-long open bar tab thing, and I managed to get invited. Unfortunately, it was at an awful bar - the kind that's just not my scene at all and it barely made the free drinks worth it. I have a feeling people who hate going out to bars only have access to this kind of bar. Blech.

I was going to attempt to salvage the night by going to one of my favorite places to dance, even though I couldn't find anyone to go with me, but the trains were all messed up and I had to do a weird transfer and I just missed the train...and then I made friends with this old Ukranian woman who fed me cookies, and for some reason that immediately sobered me up so I just decided to go home. It was a weird bust of a night.

 

My wife just yelled at me because I "always" leave stuff in the living room (i.e. glasses from water) and she "never" does. She did this while standing in front of an empty mug of hot chocolate she drank, a jar of peanut butter, and a box of crackers that she left out from yesterday, all sitting on the coffee table not five feet in front of her. She also did this without a hint of irony or sarcasm.

When I pointed out the absurdity of her claims, I was deemed "an asshole."

Ah, pregnant women. That is okay, though. I can drink. She can't. At least I'll be a drunk asshole.

I guess the crazy is setting in. It has been a pretty tame pregnancy so far, but I've been noticing more mood swings lately. This can't be good.

 

Anyone still around and up for G+?

 

Strange thought but I realized recently that Virgo's are my achilles heel. I'm not a big believer in anything (those rasied Jehovah's Witnesses can attest to this) but damn Virgo's (more so than any other sign) kill me. Why is this? Damnit!

 

yeah

 

Your Avatar is perfect for what's ahead.

 

I'm the same with Scorpios.

 

Sometimes I get all uppity and think, "Nope, nothing can shock me anymore! I'm not afraid of you, Mr. Internet!"

But then the world shows me that no, there are depths of what-the-fuck that you literally can't even imagine. I honestly spent a minute staring at my screen, mouth agape in shock, after watching this.

 

I'm sure as hell not going to find it, but there is a story about a guy who went on a cannibal forum, met up with a guy, had his penis chopped off, fried, ate it with the chopper. I can't remember the rest.

Mind ruined.

 

The solicitor was Armin Miewes. Rammstein wrote a song titled "Mein Teil" over it. Basically, Miewes posted an ad looking for a healthy 18-30ish male to be slaughtered, they started with lopping off the Bernd Jurgen Brande's (the guy who responded to the ad) dick and sauteing it, sharing the meal (rather tough, evidently), the (consensual?) victim then passed out due to blood loss, so Miewes munched on the rest of him. Eventually found guilty and sentenced to life imprisonment, as the mental health/sobriety (and thus ability to consent) of Brande was called into question. Pulled a bit of a Lecter by helping German police with some other cannibal murders.

What would discussion of FUBAR shit be without Wikipedia?

I promise the images contained in the spoilers has very little if anything to do with the paragraph above.

Spoiler

 

The following .gif is how I imagined our very own Black Jesus reacting to this:

Spoiler

 

Has anyone else tried the Mountain Dew throwbacks that have sugar instead of syrup? I don't usually like soda, but this shit is delicious.

 

Has anybody bought a pair of these shoes that are actually shaped like human feet on the outside? They have individual toes like a person's foot but are built like shoes--you've probably seen them, I'm betting they're even more popular in the States since they were ther first.

Look, I'm guessing these things are very comftorable and I'm going to guess people like wrestlers or climbing enthusiasts will lap them up, but these things are CREEPY looking. They make people look like they have robotic feet.

 

Your country's love for that demented, woefully wrongheaded poisonous beverage astonishes us up here. However, I heard it makes you instantly good at snowboarding so I'll try anything.

People at my work will empty the "Five Alive" out of the vending machine before Mountain Dew, which probably has never run out. You know there's something REALLY wrong in Whoville when people choose FiveAlive over ANYTHING, including another human's urine.

 

Both the gf and I have had a pair of them for over a year now and we like them quite a bit. I run, hike and lift with them. Biggest test so far was a 10 mile hike in the Adirondacks and they passed with flying colors, the gf is usually blistered to shit in hiking boots on that kind of distance but managed to only get one small one that time. The best part was being able to walk through water since they dry out so quick. Haven't tried them multiple days in a row though. Biggest drawback is you have to wash them fairly frequently to not smell like shit.

Second biggest drawback is people bugging the shit out of you with questions about them, though that can be avoided if you don't address the biggest drawback.

 

I am a huge fan of Merrell shoes. Excellent walking moccasins. Got mine in 2007 or 2008 and just in the past 6 months or so they started wearing down, losing tread. I walk hard. Every shoe I own is missing half the heel sole. These Merrell are durable as hell. $80 bucks for 4 years of shoe gets my sale.

Also, good morning.

 

Jeeeeeesus. I remember way the hell back in grade 8 when a classmate of mine had the biggest crush on that girl. Oh and there was another message board I used to inhabit where a guy wrote extensively about being "in love" with this particular actor. I'm not kidding. He truly and deeply believed himself to be in love with her. He eventually got over it.

Also; if hiking boots are giving you that many blisters, they're not sized properly. I have a pair of boots that I have honest to goodness worn for days straight and have never got a single blister from them.