I went to an elementary school function for my daughter last year and there was at least a Diamond, a Ruby, and a Sapphire. I want to say there was an Emerald, but I can't remember. I remember commenting to my wife that I didn't know if we were at an elementary school, a jewelry store, or a strip club. There were some other questionable names, but those were the precious stones. Speaking of, there might have been a Precious too.
I'm drunk... and pretty happy that Canada won that game. And I just watched a porn where the guy says sorry to the girl as he's cuming inside her. Weirdest thing. And Crown... have you read the the chapter in Freakonomics about naming children?
My new boxer briefs don't have a dickhole. This is a problem, because I usually snake my business through it when I'm standing at a urinal. This becomes a bigger problem when you've been drinking unhealthy amounts of coffee and have been stuck on calls all morning. It felt like a priest with a time crunch was molesting me.
Isn't it just a "flip the waistband down" kind of thing? It doesn't seem like it should be this hard.
Not when you don't want to undo your dress pants, belt, and untuck your shirt. "Shithead" was in that Freakonimics chapter, right? I think I've said these before but my sister had a girl named La-a in one of her elementary school classes (pronounced "Ladasha," no bullshit I found out while helping her correct homework) and my mom had a pair of brothers in a first grade class named Hunter and Fisher with a new younger brother named Trapper. They need another brother named Warden.
"One woman (black) named her baby Shithead, though she got very upset when people pronounced it as it would normally be pronounced – according to her the baby's name was to be pronounced shun-teed." And "Winner." And "Loser." People are ridiculous.
My mother is a teacher in a predominantly black district. Her name highlights include: Moonlight Precious(rumor has it her parents were riverfolk) Treasure And this year, she has a student named, I shit you not : The Great One Oddly enough he is an underachiever, possibly borderline retarded, and has been arrested many times. He should have been named "the future parolled one"
Then have to worry about all of your stuff getting peed on because it's flapping in the breeze. I don't know how it is with cut guys, but sometimes my foreskin sticks to itself and makes a game out of what direction my pee is going to go. It's pathetic that this is even a valid question. Yet here we are.
I mentioned this before as well, but I knew a kid named D'Elegance. Dee-Elegance. He turned out gay. Really makes you wonder that Nature vs. Nurture thing. Met another dude named Brilliance. Was a college RB at some D3 school. My goal for naming my kid is just to make sure none of their names fit into a common swear word alliteration. So no Cathy, Kate, Sarah, Ashley, Hannah, Bethany, etc. Every name can me made into a Slutty Sally or Bitch Betty, but I want to make it just a little hard so maybe it won't catch on. I'm about to do my taxes. I will not enjoy this. This will not be over quickly...
If you name your son Chad, Chazz, Hunter, Bryce, Carson, Kendall or Brock he'll become a stuck-up asshole. That, my friends, is just plain science. However if you name your daughter Emmanuelle, she might turn out hot: Spoiler
Hey, guys, tease her some more - see if you can come up with something to get her to post another picture of her boobs.
I never thought of not having foreskin problems as being a thing one takes for granted. Pointing my penis at the bowl always seemed relatively straight forward. I guess not.
I always took for granted that every pair of men's underwear ever had a dick hole. Are you sure you didn't buy panties, JJ? Maybe you should cut your dick off.
Through rummaging through Tinder, I found a "Superior", a "Dileesh", and, I can't even make this up, "Parfay". Sound it out. Yep, fruit and yogurt motherfuckers.