I made a card for my girlfriend yesterday and decided to write a poem. Not perfect but it did the job. Spoiler A poem for Lovers Roses are red, and violets are blue. As Ralph Wiggum would say, I ch-ch-choose you! I came here with steak, and I brought you some flowers. As much as I resisted (not really), I succumbed to your powers. Now together on Valentine's Day, and I really love you. So get naked baby... we've got some fucking to do!
I'm sitting at a meet and I think the kid next to me just took a picture of his nuts. He had the phone between his legs and I saw the flash. He was trying to be subtle but he should have turned the flash off then. Maybe I should say package as he's wearing pants. I think he realized I saw him as he just scuttled off. I may be sweating profusely, can barely breathe and my eyes burning, but I am never bored at these things.
I dropped acid for the first time. Around 9ish last night. I finally went to bed at 9 this morning. Then got up at noon. I have never had so much energy in my life. Finally going to crash in a couple hours. Why is everyone not doing this? Well, besides the horrible rambling garbage you spew at anyone sweet enough to listen and having to leave a party early because you were going to hulk smash some fuckstick from South Africa (sorry, Durby) into a coffee table. But what a wonderful experience. I should have done this 20 years ago. I might not be so fucked up as a human being. The fucking hippie assholes are right, you can totally unravel your fucking psyche. There's a reason LSD is used in PTSD therapy. Fuckin' hippies, man. Fuckin'. Hippies. I also want to see Putin and Joe Biden hanging out more. I feel like that is a sitcom waiting to happen.
Acid was falling off trees is the mid to late 90's. everybody was doing it and at five dollars a hit you can't go wrong. The only downside is a bad trip. There's a chance you might not ever have one, but if you do it can range from thinking you died to being engulfed by Palmetto bugs to being taunted by the undead skeletons of your grandparents when you close your eyes. If you can get by that, it's a wonderful drug. Usually for me it consisted of giggling at pretty much anything for 6 straight hours and wonderous little tricks of light that mesmerize you. Try it while standing in shallow water like a lake it truly is something else.
Screw that hippie nonsense. Get some nitrous oxide next time and watch the world explode into cartoons. At least, that's what I've heard. Ahem.
My dentist is quite liberal with the nitrous, even as far to give you some for a routine cleaning if you ask for it. I was very disappointed, more like the effect after a few beers than anything else. I turned it up when he left the room to see if I could feel anything more, nothing.
The only time I had it was during my wisdom teeth removal. It made me feel really happy-drunk, but I wouldn't fall asleep so they had to I.V. both of my arms. Boy, when that liquid paradise hits your bloodstream it's like the every-loving blissful embrace of a billion rising suns. I don't remember it for long, but it was unreal, then it was sleepy-time.
The orthodontist doing my wisdom teeth removal said it was nitrous, but it knocked me out cold instantly. No idea what kind of dosage that was. I woke up out of my mind, then passed back out for a solid day. Which was fine because that operation ruined me for a week. Couldn't open my mouth, couldn't get off the couch. My friend's girl had the same operation and it didn't bother her one bit. Bizarre.
The hubster is in Chicago at a father-daughter dance with his daughter. It is Harry Potter themed, so I am totally jealous. I decided to finally get around to watching Forgetting Sarah Marshall. The library had the unrated extended version, aw yeah!
My experience with nitrous was that it just put a warm glow on everything and time went really fast. My wisdom teeth, for all 4 teeth, felt like it took 10 minutes and I only even felt pressure on one side. It was delightful and everything felt positive. Then it wore off and I went home, having my mom stop the car every 5 min so I could spit out mouthfuls of blood like I was Rocky.
If I did acid I'd lose my mind. I have pretty clinical anxiety and day to day life is stressful enough without thinking my face is melting or I'm hearing colors. Thank fucking God alcohol helps with anxiety.
During one step of my root canal I don't know what was happening but despite being shot up with a ton of Novocaine and having the gas on a normal level I was still feeling things and cringing. So my dentist goes "let's turn this up a little" and apparently cranks the gas up to as high as it goes because I went completely out of my mind. I was convinced that the power had gone out, and the dentist and his assistant were asking me to spin the chair around and around to generate power to operate the drill. I can only imagine what I was doing in the chair. Then I didn't snap out of it right away. I called my dad as I was walking to the train and he made me sit on a bench until I stopped sounding completely insane and/or slurring my words because he thought I was going to get hit by a car. It was SO FUN.
Nitrous does nothing for me. Dentist turned it up to holy shit level and ....nothing. I turned down acid at a Fleetwood Mac concert (with friends) 33 yrs ago. However, I'm going to Ucluelet in 8 days and suggested that given the perfect, specific circumstances, I might try mushrooms for the first time. It'll be the day after I turn 49. Don't ever let yourself feel/get old.
I think mushrooms are pretty much perfect, such a mood-brightener they make a movie like Bedazzled seem hilarious.
God bless the crazy lady in Pew #7 who, while the pastor was reading the collect today, decided to recite a graphic and detailed sonnet on the fly entitled "I'm going to kill my fucking pussy cat".