Sometimes, just being passionate about something can make a woman look hot, even if that passion is anger. Personally, I think glasses tend to make both men and women slightly less attractive. I'm not sure why beyond that I find them visually jarring. Most of my friends though have the exact opposite perspective. People who talk about their cats tend to be unaware of, or indifferent to, their audience's response. Unless you are talking to a cat person, whoever is listening to you is probably thinking 'why the fuck does this person think I care what their cat does?'. And, time to cross some very dangerous ground, but since you asked why discussing dogs doesn't get the same response... in my opinion, most cats are totally indifferent to your presence unless you are feeding them or pleasing them in some way. They aren't happy to see you, and generally treat you with disdain. When I was younger, I knew more than a few girls who dated men that treated them exactly the way their cats did. Even now, when I hear someone talking about their cat(s), a residual voice in my head whispers 'does this person enjoy being taken for granted and generally ignored?'. Possibly totally irrational, but that's my experience. Shart is the only possible answer, and I am so glad I'd had lunch before I read that question.
Why do skiers want to do the triple black diamond runs instead of the bunny hill? Why do cowboys want to ride the wild mustang rather than the 23 year old petting zoo pony? Why do mountain climbers pick scary mountains and not rolling hills? Why do guys run with the bulls and not frolic with the lambs? Excitement. Danger. The challenge. It's a turn on. When a guy fucks a girl, it's not just about finding some place to dump his load, or some After School Special's idea of intimacy; it's about dominating the woman and claiming her as his. (At least if you're doing it right). The wilder the animal, the bigger the challenge, and the bigger the reward. Besides, the most boring thing ever is to be with a chick who just lies there, doing nothing. It's almost better to just go and whack off than fuck a sand bag. Being angry or passionate gives the impression/hope that the same energy would exist the bedroom. On top of that, it's physiological. A chick who's angry is showing a lot of the same body language as someone who's sexually aroused; flaring nostrils, increased rate of breathing, face flushing, chest heaving, etc. It will have a subconscious and arousing effect on the other person. Then there's just the hilarity of the Rodeo Fuck. Spoiler If you don't know, it's where you're fucking the chick doggy, and then tell her she's the worst fuck you've ever had. Hang on for 8 seconds. Try not to laugh. That just makes them more pissed off, which just makes it hotter. It's a vicious cycle. No change for me. It does add to the "librarian fantasy", but otherwise, don't really care one way or the other. It doesn't. If you have one or two cats, that's normal. If you have 8, then you're needy and desperate for love, and that will kill all interest immediately. Bloody item in your wastebasket. The other stuff isn't that big a deal. This, though, is a biohazard, disrespectful, unhygienic, and just fucking wrong.
Cats are stupid annoying assholes. They will do random shit and their owners will talk about it for weeks. I'm pretty sure they learned this trick from babies. No one wants to listen to that drivel. On glasses: It really does depend on what you look like. No hard rules for me.
You know who else hated cats? Hitler. I grew up with cats, and own one myself. What weirds us out is when girls seem to let their whole life revolve around Princess Kitty Kitty Smush-face (I had a friend and that was her cat's fucking name. No lie). I own a cat, and I swear to god, if you catch me telling a story about it in day to day conversation, shoot me in the fuckin face.
As was said before, when people are passionate, they can be more attractive. As you also assumed, though, it can be a decent disarming method. "I'm sorry, but you look so hot right now," can cool down the mood in some situations. If porn has taught me anything, it's that they're something else to cum on. As for my own preference, I could care less. Much like clothes, glasses don't make the person. There's nothing wrong with owning a cat and loving it. There is something wrong when Mr. Pickles' picture is in a locket around your neck.
So I saw her last night Her and the new guy broke up after roughly 2 months, partially due to distance and due to him "getting mad at her for something" which she wouldn't tell me. So she's been single since April. She said she's very depressed and has felt terrible all semester. I broached the topic of us being physical again and she said she wasn't ready for anything. I told her we couldn't be strictly platonic and needed space. She seemed to acknowledge romantic feelings but like they say, anything that isn't a yes is a no. Ladies: When a girl says something like that (her words were "I can't give you what I want right now" due to still being hurt from the end of her relationship with the new guy), is this just a line to let us down easy or is there truth to this?
"cute" "sexy" and "hot" have very different connotations especially when talking about someone who's angry. Sexy or hot can just be passion. Passion is sexy. Also, there's somewhat of a correlation with angry sex which can be hot, so part of it may just be the association. If a girl starts scratching her nose immediately prior to hot sex, eventually you'd have a positive association with nose scratching. "Cute" often refers to a girl who is angry but not intimidating. You may think you're scary but you're probably not. It's not cut and dry, in my opinion. Some girls look good in glasses, some girls don't. I don't universally think girls look better or worse with glasses - some girls look great in glasses. It depends on the glasses and the girl and the attitude. Just like not everyone looks good in hats or certain clothing styles or whatever. I like animals. Cats included. So I don't know. I'm sure the association with the crazy cat lady has a lot to do with it. I don't understand how a girl pooping in her pants doesn't trump all else.
Sorry to break it to you Senna, but it's an excuse. She wants to keep you in the picture, hanging around as backup while she shops. You're validating her desirability and that's all she wants from you. Or, she just doesn't have the balls to say she's not interested.
Sorry for the double post, but this just occurred to me; As some of you are aware due to my Rant/Rave post, my honey is now in jail until next May. All my girlfriends are telling me I now have to be very careful of what I say to him, due to jealousy. Went for lunch with a male co-worker? Don't mention it. Helped my brother move, along with a bunch of his guy friends? Don't mention it. Even though there is nothing wrong with those situations, they will cause stress and jealousy simply because he's locked up with too much time to think, and I'm not coming home to him at the end of every day. This somehow feels dishonest to me, as though I'm lying by omission. Gentlemen, what are your thoughts on jealousy while away from your SO for a significant time period? Is it more prevalent/harder to deal with in those kind of circumstances? How do men soothe the savage green beast? ETA: Paging Dixie!
Is "Dump the felon" an option? Mrs. Noland and I kept up a long distance relationship for about 18 months. He has to trust you. If he doesn't already trust you then your relationship is already dead; it's just waiting for someone to put a stake in its heart.
What he said. I've done it (not due to prison) and it can be a challenge. He would just ask lots of questions about anyone mentioned who had a penis. But, we trusted each other and all is well.
As much as I'm all about trust in a relationship, I don't think this is even like a normal long distance relationship. You're never going to have a happy getaway weekend to help your relationship. You can't just talk at any random time you want on the phone. He's never going to see your real behaviors or interactions with other men. I'm just thinking that all of the normal things that help mitigate jealousy in a relationship (even a long distance relationship) are no longer going to be there. Shitty situation.
This. If there's something you're trying to hide from your significant other, then either you shouldn't be doing it, or your relationship's trust/disclosure boundaries need to be reworked. Obviously your examples don't fall into the former category. To be honest, I think your friends are being counterproductive. A relationship where one hides things is not a healthy relationship. I think the best route is to treat the topics as you normally would...and then deal with jealousy if/when it arises. You shouldn't have to avoid normal topics merely to preempt jealousy. It's both unfair to you, and avoiding the issue. With my hand and a web browser. Oh, wait, that wasn't what you meant. Never mind.
My fiance is deployed. That's kind of like jail. Basically you should be telling your significant other all the things you normally would be telling him. And more. Sharing your daily habits with him to show him that you're acting like a normal, respectable girlfriend while he is away is a good thing. If you spent all weekend helping your brother and his 5 male pornstar friends to move out of their apartment, you should tell your boyfriend this. Hiding harmless stuff does more harm than good, because it casts suspicion on otherwise unimportant events. Honesty is always the best policy. Seriously though, why is he in jail? I'd probably dump him if I were in your situation.
Check out this post. As for long distance, bewildered is right: be completely honest. I'd add an addendum to that: if there is something you feel you can't tell him, then don't do it. If you think he would get upset that you went to a one-on-one lunch with a male coworker, then don't go to that lunch. Explain to anyone that you think it'd make your BF upset, and that you don't want to do anything that would make his shitty jail stay even shittier. You don't have to lie about it to your BF later, and you're not putting yourself in a position where you might have to either lie or make your bf uncomfortable and jealous. The best way to avoid having to lie or omit information is to not put yourself in a situation you may have to lie about later. Is it fair that you can't go out to a one-on-one lunch with a guy-friend? Probably not, but that is your situation, and you're kind of stuck.
He beat the shit out of someone who was attempting to rape her. If there was ever a good reason to be in jail, that might be it. It's worth noting that if you hide all this stuff, it's not like he's going to think you live in a convent. He's not (I hope) stupid. He knows you occasionally interact with men. So if he's gonna get jealous, he's gonna get jealous.
I stand corrected. Your boyfriend sounds like a star. I honestly don't know how he managed to get locked up because he did a good thing. If I were you I'd be giving him welcome home BJs every day for the rest of his life.
1 - The same visual cues for hot/horny/fuck me and pissedof/angry/mad are the same for women. Red lips, red cheeks, puffed up chest...(God bless your hearts.) 2. Tina Fey could get the D in a second. That's because she's naturally attractive. I really don't think glasses makes or breaks any girl. Guys see past clothing most of the time. We know they come off. I was talking to a female friend about another girl and I said "She's hot as fuck." "She's wearing blue and green together, that's disgusting." I replied with a blank stare. 3. Any one that puts too much attention into anything is creepy. Especially cats. My friend and his wife got two cats because both of them (mostly her) are obsessed with LOLcats, and their facebook page causes me to vomit. 4. Sharting is definitely the worst, followed by hairy puss and talking about yeast infection. I don't touch armpits even though I did go to college with a guy that fucked a girls armpit.
As some have mentioned, the same physical cues tend to occur whether women are enraged and aroused. And besides, a strong emotion denotes a passionate person, which is usually a recipe for great sex. There's a reason some of the best sex is angry sex. In my opinion it really depends, like anything else, on the woman. As you mentioned, some women look great with long hair, others with short. For me, they really go well with a girl that is petite and demure, otherwise it's a non factor. I have zero use for cats, and my problem tends to be that even if they're not crazy about them, ladies, even those with whom I am sleeping with casually, expect me to try to be nice to their pets, while the friendliest setting I can muster for any cat is cold disdain. And, obviously, a pet is a big part of a person's life and tends to reflect some aspect of them, so while not a deal breaker, for me a cat is a negative. The sharting, definitely.