I know that there was some hating on it in a drunk thread, but this is our safe space, so I'm going to sheepishly ask if anyone here has Pinterest. (It was actually a fellow TiBette that got me hooked on it. Slambrarian, where have you been??)
I'm on Pinterest for the better part of my work day. I think I would really like your pins too so inbox me and I can follow you!
I'm on Pinterest. I get great recipes and decorating ideas. Plus, it's great as a teacher because I get to see what other teachers are doing.
You have to sift through a fair amount of junk, but it is a great organizational tool. Plus it gives you the ability to peek into the interests of others, so that can be fascinating too.
Hello TIBettes- I have a problem that I could really use some advice on. My girlfriend's New Year's resolution was to get back into shape and for the last 6 weeks she has started working towards that goal. The problem is that she wants us to be thinner and she wants to be it right NOW. She exercises 4 days/week for at least an hour, quit smoking (cold turkey, the same week she gets her period...that was a fun time), and has changed her diet. What I've done is support her through encouragement, exercising with her(occasionally), telling her that I'm dating her for who she is, not her body; and saying that I'm proud of her effort and commitment. The problem is that she weighs herself and checks her waistline almost everyday. It bothers me because she is holding herself to such a high standard when what's important is that she has committed to changing herself for the better. It should be noted that there is a beach vacation planned for December and that she wants to have results by then. I just don't want her to get down on herself, feel bad, and quit...or resort to more drastic measures. So yeah...I could use a little guidance
You are doing great simply by encouraging her. Don't try to sabatoge her, don't try to convince her to cheat on her diet "just this once", don't tell her that you think that she is taking things too seriously. If she is following through with what she said that she was going to, then she isn't going to get down on herself, she is working towards her goal and that is great. She is likely weighing and measuring to track her progress. Just let her know that you are impressed with her dedication and comittment, she is STILL beautiful to you, and you are behind her all the way. When it is time to start taking it less seriously, she will let you know.
She is showing disordered behavior. Weighing and measuring daily is a very bad thing. It's obsessive and counter productive. Support your girl, but figure out a way to convey that her results will be more readily apparent if she only weighs and measures once a week.
Agreed, this sounds like a recipe for the start of something bad. I wonder if you could channel her measurement of progress more towards physical performance...like run time/distance or amount of weight lifted? I don't know about this type of stuff, I'm sure exercise related disorders aren't a great path to get on either, but it seems like if she's starting to get unhealthy about things, the "too much exercise" route is a bit better than too little food, etc. You could suggest clubs or groups focused on her exercise of choice, or an event in the future to train for.
I disagree. Being impatient and weighing yourself every day is just that....being impatient. I've been there. And I wasn't under eating, eating junk, abusing laxatives, or hurting myself in any way. I was, however, putting my daily weight as well as exactly how I was exercising and what I was eating, with the use of a kitchen scale, into a weight loss website. If you know what your goals are and have a precise plan, there is no harm in tracking it faithfully. Personally, when I saw my hard work paying off on an almost daily basis, I felt good and it made me want to stick to the plan even more.
Yeah, I weigh everyday and find it helpful, especially since you mitigate the effect of outlier days. But it sounds like she's beating herself up over being a half pound heavier one day than the last which is not good. It's hard to recommend anything other than trying to reinforce that weight fluctuates and putting on muscle will add weight. It's a good thing that she's measuring her waist instead of just weight though as people tend to pack on some muscle if they exercise regularly while leaning out.
As somebody who did/does check their weight daily to keep me honest and on track and got/gets really fucking pissed when people even hint that doing so could be signs of some sort of eating disorder (that is a pretty harsh accusation if you take the time to think about it - and not a term to be tossed around lightly), I agree with Frank and bewildered. When I was in school, I also did practice tests nonstop when available because I like to have feedback on how I am doing to let me know if I need to change course. I think that this is pretty similar. The idea for the fitness goals is also a good one, but I see no harm in wanting to know how you are progressing against your goal.
It sounds a little obsessive, but I don't really see the harm. Just keep doing exactly what you're doing now. Support her, let her know you're not going anywhere and you love her no matter what, but also keep a look out for less healthy behavior. Maybe suggest a class that she can take (or that you can take together if you feel up to it.) It will give her a group of people to talk to about weight loss and, if you do it together, will show her that you are supportive.
I think that people should put less importance on what the scale says and only take that information as one small part of assessing progress. Obviously it can be a helpful tool, especially if someone's overweight and in dire need of a wake-up call/seeing their weight in black and white. But, it's really easy to become obsessed with reaching a target number and failing to look at things like body fat percentage and muscle mass. I threw away my scale years ago, and the only time I get weighed these days is 2-3 times a year at the doctor's office. I think going by measurements, body fat percentage and reaching training goals is much more positive and encouraging. Most people need that encouragement when changing lifestyles. What most people don't need is fixating on the daily 1-3 lb. fluctuations we all have. I think that for some people it's really easy to become frustrated and quit or develop an eating disorder because the results aren't coming quickly enough that way. Maybe you could suggest that she only weigh herself once a week and find a group to train with. When I started running training with a group was a really fun way to challenge myself and I met some great people. On that note, I'm off to the walk-in clinic.
Here's the thing, though: A beginning dieter needs to be aware of precisely how much fluctuation is average for his or her body. Daily weigh-ins help with that. I used to RAGE over my inability to lose scale weight. Like, literally RAGE. Then I started weighing myself every morning as soon as I got up, and every evening right before I went to bed. For three months. I learned some important things about my body that I now factor into all diet/weight-loss plans: 1. The week before and the week during my period is fucked to the highest degree of motherfuckery possible. During this time, I will pack on 8-10 lbs. and there's not a damn thing I can do about it. Disregard numbers during this period as wholly inaccurate and just keep doing what I'm supposed to be doing. 2. All other days, I can expect anywhere from a 3-5 lb. fluctuation thoughout the course of a day. 3. I drink a boatload of water, so dehydration will actually give me an "average" fluctuation loss of 1-3 lbs.. Now that I know that, I can see a sudden weight drop for what it is: I'm consuming less water and need to step up my hydration game. Knowing that two whole weeks out of every month are useless for measuring my weight loss is so, so helpful. I no longer step on the scale after a few months of hard work and dedication and feel like giving up because I've gained ten pounds overnight. Knowing that a 1-3 lb. drop overnight isn't an actual victory is helpful, too. If you think about it, most people start dieting because they haven't been paying attention to their bodies all along. It makes sense that she would want to weigh herself frequently in the beginning as a means of acquiring more information about herself and her fluctuation nuances.