That's just the thing, we buy the kitten brand. Those are the softest shit tickets on the market. The next step up would be buying silk fabric by the yard and shredding it into 4" by 4" squares, or wiping our asses with actual kittens.
So, your options with kittens are to shoot them or to shit on them? Christ almighty, what poor woman agreed to have your penis inside her? Ladies, this stuff is fucking spectacular.
Gross question: Do any of you tibettes have PCOS or stupid other broken ovary problems? Because apparently I had an ovarian cyst rupture last night (sick) and I was pretty sure I was going to throw up, pass out and die. I was also stuck in a car for the first (worst) 45 minutes of it. I've consulted Dr. Mom and Dr. Internet, but I was wondering if any of you have any insight into the matter.
Ladies: Shellac manicures. For some reason I did not know about these before two days ago. I am in LOVE.
They are amazing, those and gel polish. If it starts chipping, DO NOT peel it off. It will take a layer of your nail with it and then you are left with this, bendy tips. Ouch.
Girl shit is the worst shit. It's not what you're thinking. Spoiler Because of my impending (and seemingly never going to happen) move to the east coast, I'm in the position of having to find a new head coach for my gym. I'm practically GIVING this person the business. One of the athletes has really made something of herself along the way and I thought that, based on her enthusiasm and real passion for what she sees as a way to improve quality of life, she'd be a good fit for the role. Known quantity, familiar face at the gym, and all that. She's been coaching since April...Jeeeeez was I wrong. I keep getting some ferociously bad feedback about her - "smug", "condescending", "clique-y", "not cut out to coach", "has an attitude problem", "has a chip on her shoulder", "better athlete than coach", and so on. It's not just one person, it's several people, and I've lost clientele because of her...issues. Try to talk to her about it, to tell her that she's not just selling programming, she's got to find a way to make people want to see HER. To come in and do some pretty gruntastic hard work because SHE is the one asking it of them, and man. She did not like hearing that. She got uber defensive and started flipping script at me. Now I'm in a quandary because...shit. I guess I need to find a head coach. Or something. I dunno. I wish this was easier.
The boy went for his 11 year old shots yesterday. We kept meaning to call and ask if they would give him the HPV vaccination, but both of us kept forgetting. Mrs. Noland took him yesterday afternoon and the HPV vaccine is a standard inoculation now. At least with our pediatrician. I don't know if that's the norm.
It's standard procedure to ask at our doctor's office, but it's not an automatic give. I just read an article that said the HPV vaccine is doing well for boys, at least for the first dose, considering it's a newer one. Found the article: HPV Vaccine I don't know if this is standard, but at our doctor's office, once the child turns 16, we are not allowed to view any of their medical information without their permission. So my oldest had to go for her swimming physical so I just let her go by herself since she was 17. The office called me and I had to give permission to treat her. I said I just thought since apparently none of her medical issues are my business anymore, that she could go by herself. Snarky but I don't care. I don't know if it's an office rule or state law.
This is an odd and somewhat personal question. Any of you ladies ever have orgasms in your sleep? I've started having them with a certain degree of regularity - like, once every few months. I'll be having a sex dream and just wake up having an orgasm. No fingers or anything else involved. I have been told that this is weird (but awesome).
It's happened once. Occasionally (maybe 2-3 times a year) I'll wake up super wet without rhyme or reason. It's confusing. I didn't wet the bed.
I've had this happen before. The most recent event was when I was having a dream about a friends husband. Tell me that's not awkward.
Don't you mean awesome? My husband says he doesn't care where I get my appetite as long as I come home for dinner. And yes, it's happened to me. No fingers either. I normally wake up as I'm orgasming. I don't always remember specifics. And I try. Because it must have been a pretty great dream. I think though sometimes in my dream I'm fingering myself because when I first wake up I look where my hands are. They've never been in my panties. So must be part of the dream.
I'm glad I'm not the only one (although it wasn't like it was some kind of curse to begin with). Now, I just wish my sex dream had involved sexier people than fucking Sylvester Stallone and Tawny Kitaen. Jesus.
Yes... except I wake up riiiight before the orgasm. Fuck you, brain, let's get it together and finish the job.