Add a dust buster and do it. (wet vac would be too cumbersome). Some chick somewhere will have a sense of humor and will help you get your dick wet.
My best friend and his wife throw a themed costume party every year. Last year was superheroes and supervillians, but I didn't get the memo, I showed up in a Dharma jumpsuit. This year, it's video game characters. My buddy J's wife called me up and said, "Dude. You need to find a Bowser costume." J reinforced it by calling and saying, "I'm gonna be Mario, Amy is gonna be Luigi, and our daughter is gonna be Princess Peach. And after the party, I'm gonna fuck Luigi." (That last part he had special glee in his voice) Problem is, I couldn't find a Bowser costume. I went with Toadstool instead. I'll post pictures of me actually there, as well as pics of everyone else, but here's where I got it from: (But without the retarded helmet string)
I don't see how this could fail, I mean once you guys hook up she knows she's getting a free abortion.
In my personal experience, the abortionist costume leads to 17 disgusted looks, one attempted face-slap, and one cute, laughing girl to whom you propose marriage, but who politely declines. I have no regrets.
Step 1. Tape book to side of head. Step 2. You are done. When people ask what the fuck you are, just say "I'm facebook you idiot."
Since my wife isn't dressing up really this year (i think she is borrowing a hard hat and saying she's a cunstruction lady) I suggested she paint a clown or goblin on the seat of her pants. I got told to fuck off. Apparently the love of my life has no desires to be an assclown or assgoblin.....pfffft just trying to help. Hockey game 9 pm tommorow night....will i have sobered up or beat ttonights hangover by then....time will telll. ba ba bummmmmmmmm
Does no other guy here cross dress for the fun of it? Maybe I'm missing something here (like it sends a wrong message) but I do it almost every year mainly because I can't think of another costume to be. This year I'll be upgrading from just a "chick" to hooker.
I was a cheerleader in middle school one year. Complete with a nerf football cut in half for my boobies...I should head over to that thread and post up.
I went ahead and stole someone's pedophile costume idea that was mentioned earlier, but I couldn't resist. I'm probably going to get disapproving comments or get told to make an early exit at the bar bash I'm going to tomorrow, but fuck it, why not? The Goodwill Thrift store is a gold mine for cheap and easy Halloween costume ideas. Highly recommended.
I want to do this, or something like it, next year. Anyone know where I can get it? My google skills aren't good.
There's one drawback: it's the one morning after of the year where the walk of shame actually sucks when you're a guy. As men, we are usually striding high and waving at passing cars and pedestrians, but there's nothing quite like walking back to your house hung over to the tits and sexed out on November first wearing nothing but a friggin' leopard print caveman loin cloth and dragging a plastic Fred Flintstone club in 10 degree (Celsius) weather.
Tim Tebow. Kinda played out, but it's easy, cheap, and I mean it's fuckin' Tim Tebow....chicks love him.
I'm going with one I wore several years ago - crossing guard. I have a reflective net vest with the words crossing guard, a matching color whistle, and hand held stop sign. I will be in an area with heavy car and pedestrian traffic tonight so I will be performing during bar-to-bar commutes. A couple I know is going as Rollergirl and Dirk Diggler from Boogie Nights. They have matching spandex shorts and tank-tops; props consist of roller skates for her and a massive dildo which peeks (actually full on hangs) out of his shorts. I heard this second hand but I will try and post a photo if I can find it on facebook or see them tonight.