Oh, this thread is going to be fun! Nice work starting this one. As a mother of an almost 24yr. old girl child, I'm going to have to trip down memory lane, but I promise to finally get back to contributing to this board. It will come in spurts, either when I have time (due to my hectic social life -that's right, they grow up, move out and you have little responsibility), or my level of sobriety, which is questionable frequently, like right now. Firstly, the whole planning offspring thing. Mmmm, I got knocked up a week after I started having sex with The Dad. Did I mention I had been with him for two months and we announced our engagement at a wedding Saturday night and then to my family in another city the next day while eating Thanksgiving dinner, then we had the sex for the first time. Yeah. That happened. (before certain ppl. attack as usual, we were together for 20 years and still live together as friends 25 yrs. later) The point? Dunno, but I discovered the pill and she's an only child. I'd need to be more clearheaded to articulate how difficult it was to pull the trigger on planning another kid. So many reasons.... Carry on. I love these stories. One real baby moment/advice to give to those unsuspecting parents of babies...DO NOT lay on your back and hold your baby high up over you after they've eaten, you laughing and making noises and faces, unless you really want a mouthful of baby puke. Gospel.
My favorite memory of baby daddy was when he ignored my cautions about throwing my son in the air just after nursing and experienced this. His mouth was wide open and everything. HAHAHAHAHAHA! I'm gonna remind him of that right now... I got knocked up whilst on the pill, I was taking it sporadically because I was drinking and doing too much blow at the time. I found out I was pregnant because the thought of alcohol and blow suddenly made me throw up on the spot. Thank baby jesus I don't have daughters. My sons are already ladies men, which is freaky, I can see myself staring down a seven year old boy trying to hold my daughter's hand...and collecting weapons for when she is a teen. I know what the teens are up to these days and I refuse to be an young grandmother.
I got knocked up at 16. My second was a decision we made knowing we wanted a kid. My third was a surprise. IF I have a fourth, it'll be in the next 18 months (which...isn't long at all, really) and it won't be a surprise. Kids..aren't easy. Give me boys any day of the week. Keep them active, teach them independent thought, and don't let them rule your house. And wine. It helps. For you. Not them.
Girlfriends daughter is five. She has more mouth, more attitude, and causes more headaches than my twin boys put together. Plus there's the the whole remembering being a teenage boy thing.
I've got a 9-year old daughter. I've heard the horror stories, but I also know friends with teenage girls (one of which is my goddaughter), and these girls are fantastic. They've had some struggles, but in general they are engaging, mature, bright kids who get along very well with their parents and other adults. Not that my daughter will necessarily turn out the same way, but it isn't all a dark forecast. So far I think it is awesome having a girl. I take her fishing, hiking, camping, to baseball games - almost everything I'd do with a son, if I had one. We have a great time together, and she is into all of it - I"m not just dragging her along while I do things that I like to do. At the same time, she is cute and cuddly, and still very much in her daddy worship phase. I know that will change, but I'm hoping we will have a close enough relationship that the hormones and the struggle for independence will not be as rough as it otherwise might have been.
In my house, I have slept past 10 am two times in four and a half years. This is why when I go drinking I crash at a friends. Children do not understand or give a living shit about hangovers. Remember that. Mine is usually four barrels-open by 8am on average. Does anybody else ever get woken up by being used as a high-jump crash pad? Sweet, huh? At what age are we allowed to return the favour?
I have no children, but I have been on the opposite end of this. My dad pretty much started once I could realize I was not being attacked, obviously not trying to hurt me. What really got me was the silent "I know you're hungover, this shall be fun" early morning chores that cropped up as I got older. Just bid your time.
Wow. Ok. I don't have this problem with my kids... Since they were mobile, they've always known that my bedroom is MINE. They are not welcome unless invited, and even then, it's MY space. They know they have to be bleeding, broken, or on fire to just burst into my bedroom.
Was this something that came up as they got older and past the stage where they believe their nightmares might be real? Just curious, maybe its due to the fact that my parents obviously only had sex once to conceive me, but I was always welcome in there. Door open walk on in, knock if its shut.
It was just...always that way. Nightmares weren't something my kids had...and if they did, they knocked and let me know and I took them back to bed. That only happened mayyyyybe once or twice though. I'm an odd parent...I don't let my kids dictate our boundaries. I love them, and I'd do so much for them, but...boundaries are boundaries because we all need our space. They get to set certain boundaries as well, and for the most part they're respected.
Same here. My bedroom is off limits. One time, my son had a nightmare and was crying at my door. Fortunately, my mommy senses woke me up when he was still climbing down his bunk bed and I met him there, scooped him up and held him til he calmed. We talked about it, then I tucked him back into his bed. A good friend of mine wakes up every morning with her three kids in her bed, her home is all theirs. It is nothing but chaos there, it sets my teeth on edge when I visit her. Absolutely nothing is hers, her kids are spoiled. Her son called me an asshole when he was four, she gave him candy to change the subject. My kids were appalled and chewed him out for saying that word. I could go on, but I am getting irritated just thinking about those kids. Anyhow, I tend to set boundaries and I expect them to be respected, I am doing my kids a favor. They will be respectful when they are older, because it has been instilled from a young age.
For any new or prospective parents, my advice to you is this: <a class="postlink" href="http://www.happiestbaby.com/store/cart.php" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;">http://www.happiestbaby.com/store/cart.php</a> You don't need to buy it, just go to your local library and check it out. It will give you hours of extra sleep and bring a bit of sanity to an otherwise insane time.
I think my kid could make the Happiest Baby a very unhappy one. This guy can cry, and is still having a hard time sleeping (Only 4 months, though). He's soothed by the boob, and wants it in his mouth at all times. I can't blame him, but I think he may be hogging my wife. I'm trying not to set a time when I think it will be over and he'll sleep better; best not to be disappointed.
My girl-child was on the tit so much the husband forgot what they looked like. Don't fret about the sleeping thing however, mine finally slept through the night at 2 1/2.... Yeah, she's an only child (and at 23 a little bi). Just saying.
My oldest daughter is 9, and I'm starting to think about the Gardasil HPV vaccination, since it's recommended between 9-12. I'm not quite sure how or even if I want to explain this vaccination to her. We've had age appropriate discussions about sex and STIs, but I'm not sure if I should explain to her that this is a vaccination against one of them, or if I should just treat it like any other shot she's had and then tell her she's had the vaccination and talk about it in more depth once she's a bit more knowledgeable. Thoughts?
Our daughter is 5 and we're going to do it when the time is right. I don't think we'll tell her exactly why. Cervical cancer and genital warts isn't really a conversation I want to have with my 9 - 12 year old so we'll tell her when she gets a little older.
I wouldn't treat it any different from any other shot. Just that there are certain diseases we can prevent through vaccination, so we do the vaccines. If she presses, saying "oh like polio and stuff." And then redirecting, if you aren't comfortable going into details.