If the teaser for next week is any indication, it looks like he throws himself on the mercy of the Authority.
I will say that all of the super gay shit was starting to fuck with me. I don't care if two dudes get it on but goddamn, I want to stop seeing it. This was entirely offset and redeemed by any scene with Jessica and the gratuitous nudity of the final scene of the episode. God. Bless. Dat Ass
So is every male vampire gay, or does being alive for more than 1000 years start to take it's toll on your heterosexuality (like prison, it wears it down)? I guess eventually you get sick of the same old chocolate and have to start eating the ones with the nuts. However, did Erik NOT stab the shit out of Talbot from behind or what? HA!!!! (self high-five) I thought Erik says Werewolves don't fear death. That greasy prick at the end was begging for his life from Jessica like a six year old girl. I am the happiest little pirate in all of Puppetland that Russell didn't do her in becauser I TRULY thought he was going to, and the show would suck without her. Sam's plot has picked up even more, now that's it's crossing over into Jason's boring uninteresting story. If we don't have to see Sam's dad in his gitch once more I think we'll all be blessed. I don't get it with Sookie's evolution in the last couple weeks. She has one Indigo Girls-designed wet dream and she wakes up as Wonder Woman without the awesome-ass outfit? As much as I enjoyed the white trash bitch fight she had with whats-her-face, that wolf chick has ten times her strength and Sookie went toe-to-toe with her and won. One more thing: was "Russell" a common name back when the pyramids were practically being built? The guy is 3000 fucking years old. I don't picture it being common at the same time Stonehenge was still in use. The shit hit the fan even earlier than I thought, and that episode was even better than last week, despite it was gayer than Richard Simmons' underpants. Best season yet EASILY.
I'm thinking he's probably changed his name a bunch of times since he was born. Considering all those priceless artifacts he stole (we saw how he got the Viking crown, after all) he probably wants to keep people off his trail. By the end of the episode, I just had to throw my hands up in the air and cheer "Yay HBO!" because there was some gratuitous nudity in there for everyone. After all, isn't that what HBO is about, really? Hot sexy sex for all, no matter what your gender, orientation, race or species!
Sweet monkey-fucking jesus does Anna Paquin have a great ass. I think we all got a little foreboding when Erik told Russell that given the chance, he'd show him just how loyal he was. I was anticipating something political, not killing his boyfriend. Nicely done. Sookie did make mention of the fact that she was chock-full of V to explain her going toe to toe with Debbie. My question there is, why hasn't Sookie been subjected to V visions like Jason (or presumably werewolves and normal folk) was? She's drank more vampire blood than anyone else on the show. For that matter, she was drained almost to death, and then given an IV of V. Why wasn't she turned? Does it have to do with her being Spoiler a fairy ? Bill revealing his game looks like it should be good, and anything with Pam makes me happy, so I'm looking forward to the next one.
Waiting for episodes to download fucking sucks. My patience finally hit the wall and I ordered the first 6 books yesterday. I'll see if I can wait for the end of this season to start reading them - but I don't expect to make it.
For those counting, that was 4 episodes of gay shit with only 1 side boob (Erik fucking the viking chick while his family is killed) before Sookie showed her cookies. One of my guilty television pleasures has always been Buffy the Vampire Slayer. The only channel that is now shown on is LOGO (the gay and lesbian network). With True Blood's transition this season, I am thinking that vampires are a liberal brainwashing trick trying to turn me gay. Look, I'm open minded. I just liked the first 2 seasons where I was guaranteed hot chicks getting naked EVERY EPISODE. This is the first season that has broken that streak, and I don't like it. For a while, I almost started thinking watching and reading Twilight might make me less than a fruitcake than watching True Blood. FOCUS: I laughed my ass off when Lafayette opened the door and his mom screamed "Oh, Jesus!" when she saw Jesus standing there. Tara better fucking die soon. She is boring the shit out of me. She's not even smart enough to properly murder a vampire. Bill is looking like a cadavar lately. Why is Jason chasing after that meth girl (I don't care what she is.)? She's fucking ugly compared to the tail he was pulling before. Sookie needs to be naked more. And by more, I mean for 75% of the show.
I've been catching up on episodes and it's just... my God. How is it that bad? She has easily dethroned Mia from Californication as the "Female character I would most like to see fed to a velociraptor." That's right Crown, it's that bad to me.
That was the best episode conclusion this show has EVER had, period. Fuck Franklyn, I think Russell is my new hero. Carrying Talbot's gory remains around in a crystal urn? Fucking hysterical. This season, the best yet, keeps getting better and better each week. Why is everybody suddenly dressed like a 98 Degrees video when they enter EnyaLand? That's how faries dress? Like douchebags? That hideously ugly new waitress I am suspiscious of. She always says the right thing for everything. Therefore, she can't be trusted. Sam FUCKED SHIT UP. Hell yeah.
"And now, time for the weather." Classic. The whole speech while holding the spine of the man he'd just killed was fantastic.
I don't think I'm going to get many arguments that every episode should start with Sookie in the shower and topless. For some reason her boobs make me so happy. I died laughing, fucking die laughing when Russell had Talbots remains in that glass vase, I'm hoping for 2-3 more monologues with that vase. No one else disappointed the "Authority" the previously badass magister was scared shitless of, are some faceless suits who have to talk through someone, sitting in some stainless steel web conference room? Even worse there is that conflict I'd like to to start talking about, the Authority only being around a few hundred years while there are so many vampires older. I also love how Nan puts up with all that bullshit about only drinking True Blood, and then she has a playboy model in her limo that she drinks. Fucking hot model too. So what the fuck? Vampires just automatically veer towards homosexuality. The only old vampire on this show we haven't seen totally gay was Godric. Sophie Anne, and Nan both lez out. Then of course Russell. Then again, Pam was eating out that chick too and she's only 100. Yeah, I'm giving up on this thinking. Last note...isn't Jessica the most adorable fucking thing ever. Her scenes were just great and she just looks perfect when she's on screen. *Parker has a ginger problem.
I wouldn't call Eric totally gay. He quite clearly loves the ladies. I was so happy when Sam went off the deep end. I hope him and Tommy start fucking shit up. Sam always seems to be boring as hell and then comes through in the clutch every season so far. I am pissed, absolutely PISSED that Jason shot Franklin. I would have preferred they just didn't bring him back rather than bring him back for two seconds for the most anti-climactic scene ever. Franklin was a bad ass and he will be missed.
It was a terrible way to send out an awesome character. My main gripe was there was a prime chance for one of my favorite characters to eliminate one of my least favorite, and instead Tara's eye bulging ass lives to fuck up another day while Franklin becomes rat food.
Enough with Jason's little white trash fist target. She betrays him four times in four seconds, then tough-guy shoves him in the parking lot in favour of her abusive daddy with the gigantic eye sockets (Could anybody tell me why Lafayette was driving him to the hospital? Did he not try to fuck him up, rip him off AND tool his gorgeous 'Vette a few episodes back?). It's bad enough Jason's acting like an twitchy asshole douche the whole season with his over inflated Fake Cop Swagger. Ditch the bitch. She's not even hot, so why dee fuck? Another thing: Sam's brother is a pouty little twat. A walking, breathing Napoleon Complex with a one million pound chip on his shoulder. Yes, he's been through hell. But where's the fucking gratitude? Sam's one of the most respectable people on the show and the little shit is CONSTANTLY pissing into his pool. If there's one thing I can't stand in life it's people who pick fights with EVERYBODY just for the sake of it. Jessica is not only still insanely hot but really has got to shine as a character this season. She's funny and does a good job at playing someone permanently stuck in the Awkward Phase. I'm glad they're enriching this role, and I hope she sticks around for awhile. My Spidey-Senses are tingling for something bad to happen to Lafayette this season. REALLY bad. Don't ask me why.
Fucking Jason. Also: fucking Franklin. While Jason is a huge douche and everything he does is so fucking inexcusably stupid it makes my head hurt, Franklin could have at least snapped the fucker's neck and gotten on with the crazy. Instead he chose to stand there like an idiot going "You know I'm a vapire right" actually setting Jason up for a one-liner. Those assholes who write this show just keep writing characters MUCH more interesting than any of the main cast (excluding Lafayette) and then killing them off. Most likely to stop them from overshadowing said main cast. Seriously, HOW is Tara still not a puddle yet?!
Jason Stackhouse was one of the best things about the last half of last season and even as he's being dragged down by some horrible storylines this year ("I'm almost a cop"), he's still had a few bright moments ("I didn't think I was smart enough to get depressed."). But I agree, it's a shame that he and Franklin had to cross paths the way they did. Stake Shells are bad ass, but there are plenty of other vamps that deserved to be turned to goo.
Was it just me, or did that episode really drag the momentum of the last few weeks? Erik is acting like a TOTAL fucking goo-goo weirdo. I mute the TV when Tara speaks. Enough with the Were-whatever the fucks. Except Alcide, I hope we never see a werewolf after this season. Even humans can beat them up, they aren't cool looking and generally are boring as fuck. Now werepanthers/leopards? Why jungle cats? Why would a white trash little two-faced bitch be a tree-pouncing mankiller from near the equator? Sam is a were-anything, basically. The concept is fucking confusing and they should get rid of them all except for the formally mentioned Sam and Alcide. When Sam hits the booze (or the rednecks) he really brings out his past demons. That little side story came out of nowhere.
I agree, after the momentum built up over the past couple of episodes, this was a bit of a disappointment. Couple of good lines from Sam and for some reason I continue to love Terry, but other than that...whatever. Sookie has fairy blood, crazy inbred werechick needs to go in breed some more, Tara hates vampires, Eric is on the defensive (and normally Eric does no wrong for me). Yep boring.