Try to make me go to rehab, but I said "no, no no!"

My new signature

I just told my wife two weeks ago that I'm going to check myself into rehab on my terms and time table. I am not in control anymore and telling her made me feel a lot better. She's not stupid, she knew. I also just told my best friend, and next will be my parents.

Frankly, I am scared. Despite what you internet folk think, I am universally loved amongst my circle of friends and colleagues...I just have a hard time being witty on message boards. I'm generally the center of attention and can still pull B- pussy if I was so inclined. Also, I'm good at my job; extremely effective and reasonably dependable. But I haven't been sober in one capacity or another for 14 years. What does that mean? Will they love me if I am? Will I still function at the same level?

But you know what? I hate waking up in the morning. Morning's are the loneliest part of my day...and I wake up next to a beautiful woman every single day. Think about that.

So there you go jackals. I'm literally going to finish my beer, change my clothes, pack a cooler and go fishing with my wife. And no, my wife is not even close to an addict. Thank God, because I'd probably be dead by now..

 

Addicts are always delusional, jk, good luck in rehab.

 

My question is...so what?

Some people are addicts. Are and always will be. It would be nice to they could enjoy everything in moderation and be normal, but fora large number of people, this is not a realistic possibility. They know they'll fail.

For these sorts of people, isn't substituting a 'healthy' addiction for their unhealthy addiction a reasonable and responsible action? be it AA, running, cooking, etc., I see nothing wrong with finding a more acceptable replacement for the role your addiction used to have in your life, and using it as a structure to prevent yourself from failing.

 

A note on AA, their success rates and the success rates of cold turkey quitters are essentially indistinguishable. The religion aspect is incredibly problematic if you aren't into the whole god thing, no matter how much they might try to spin it otherwise, and depending on who's metrics you look at, something like 98% of AA participants of more than 90 days are cigarette smokers.

Of all my friends who did the quitting thing, AA was probably the least effective. Rehab facillity stay programs really did work better for everyone I knew. All my friends who worked a program either in facillity or through meetings came away smokers. Maybe 65% were smokers before the programs. Anything that works is worth using, but wow it shits me when people talk about AA like it's just the only reasonable way to approach quitting.

I did my quitting cold turkey. I went a couple of years without alchohol. I went from a 3 day a week any drug I could find (mostly amphetamines) pattern to clean for a year and mostly clean/very moderate use (once or twice a year) for the last 5 years. I don't include pot in that - that bumps up to a couple of times a quarter - but two cones is a pot binge for me since I cleaned up. Quitting was the hardest thing I had ever done at that point - I had to change my circle of friends, my social activities, I had to rebuild essentially my entire life, as well as kicking that compulsion to use. Speed dealers here commonly cut with glucose and a drop of diesel. I still get occasional jaw wobbles when I smell diesel - for the year after I quit it was an active jaw chatter and facial contortions.

I quit alcohol for a few months this year after not going more than a day every two weeks without for 6 months. I don't really think that particular usage pattern was a problem, certainly not compared to my previous abuse patterns - but my friends were concerned and my external stress level dropped right around the time I took a couple of months of anyway so it wasn't a big deal.

 

My experience was totally different from you just talked about.

Your smoking statistic is way off, when I was in rehab there was a strong movement to get the people to quit smoking as well while in rehab for drugs or alcohol, basically you could add a 12 step program for Tobacco addiction. The rate of people in my rehab who were actively using tobacco was less than 50% from the statistics shown to me.
Twenty years ago it was much higher.
The previous view was that smoking cigs was better than doing drugs, which is ironic since trading one addiction for another that will kill you is not real smart.
The success rate of AA is about 5%, so 5% of people who start AA continue on it for 5 years or more. (that was the study I saw), the same success rate as any other program, cold turkey included.

My experience with the AA method of treatment was very much not religious, AA does not discriminate against any religion or athiesm and my rehab was very careful not to be at all religious while teaching the 12 step program.

Steps 2 and 3 are the greatest causes of angst.

2. Came to believe that a Power greater than ourselves could restore us to
sanity.
3. Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God as we
understood Him.

God as we understood Him, the cause of a lot of angry discussions, for me not so much because I believe in God but for others it is very hard.
There is another program called celebrate recovery, that has decided the 12 step program is no religious enough.

Whether you like AA or not, if you have an addiction problem and need to get help it is important to have a plan because the one you currently have is not working and AA does offer a program to get you sober, there are other programs that are just as effective but you have to do something. Participating in a program that has religious roots will not kill you, your addiction will if not treated.

 

I went to rehab about five years back due to similar circumstances that dewercs listed. The daily program wasn't as rigorous as Hazelden's, it went something like this.

7am - wake up/shower/clean your room
7:30 - Breakfast
8-9 - Some sort of PT
10-12 - Some sort of addiction workshop
12-1 Lunch
1-3 Some sort of addiction workshop

Then in the later parts of the afternoon there would be a lot of one on one time, followed up by dinner and then we'd go to a local AA meeting. Dewercs and others are right when they say that the major hangup people have with AA is the whole issue of a higher power, which most interpret to mean God. There are certainly people within every AA meeting that believe that unless you turn your life over to God then you aren't really doing the program, but fuck that, I go to AA 3-4 times a week and the fact that I don't buy into creationism doesn't change the fact that talking to people who have gone through the same shit I have does help.

In regard to the addiction to tobacco that scootah brought up, in my rehab the general idea was that if someone was detoxing from heroin or something like that, then lets deal with the heroin addiction way before we even touch the idea of cutting him off cigarettes, but that being said, all of the medical staff did strongly urge most of us to start on chantix.

All in all, rehab did work for me. Had I continued on the path I was going down, drinking the better part of a handle of vodka each night, I have no idea where I'd be. I relapsed roughly two years ago at a random social event, but the feeling that I just fucked up was enough to stop me from ordering another drink, and since that incident things have been relatively smooth.

 

And this is the key. AA, SOS, SMART, Celebrate Recovery...these are not programs of "assmosis" (you don't get recovery by just sitting on your ass in meetings).

In AA, the cornerstone of one's sobriety is working with other alcoholics and being of service. Anytime I've met someone who has said, "I tried AA, it didn't work,"--and I've met plenty of folks in rehab facilities who have said that--I ask them how did they work the program. I've never gotten an answer that came close to how the program is worked. Just going to meetings isn't working the program. That may keep some from drinking for a period of time, but the large majority of them are "dry drunks." Abstinence and sobriety aren't the same thing. Meetings are important, but they're just a piece of the broader landscape.

It's been my experience that AA works for those who work it, atheists and agnostics included.

 

I leave tomorrow. God, the last couple of days have trying on my soul.

 

Congrats for pulling the trigger, takes courage to address issues.

 

Sir, it takes courage to watch marley and me in my emotional, drunken state with my girl right now. Go time.

 

One thing I've learned is that it takes action to recover from any addiction, rehabs & 12 step programs don't work unless you want to be there. Obvious I know but its amazing how many people just don't fucking get that.

I entered my first and only (so far) dual diagnosis detox on 1.20.09. I was physically addicted to alcohol & heroin for the past 5 years. My interpretation of my value in society was so fucked that I figured I should either kill myself or try recovery. Thankfully I have had a good experience so far in recovery and the only things I really miss are good red wine and LSD.

What struck me about detox was that I was the only one there for the first time. After the physical withdrawals were over it was like day camp for me. We had group, we ate, we played games, watched videos, smoked 8 ciggys a day, and talked shit. It wasn't fun & it was a lockdown facility but it was much better than the life I was living.

After detox I completed a 2 week outpatient program with solid AA participation since. I have plenty regrets but one isn't going to detox. Also the numbers for patients maintaining sobriety are very frightening and I've met so many people who have "gone back out" never to be heard from again.

be well.

 

And I'm back after spending 24 days of rehab fun. God have mercy on our youth. I had a positive experience for the most part, but when you get a bunch of 21 year old miscreants detoxing off of heroin and / or high off Saboxin / Subutex, you're bound for some friction. This place was a notch below a fucking mental hospital. Furthermore, the facility I went to boasted a lot of wellness and spiritual type activities that were lies, phone policies that were lies, discharge policies that were lies...you get the idea, anything to get your ass through the door and those insurance deposits started. It was 12 step based program and I went to my first meeting this evening, about an hour after I walked through my front door. I'll be sticking with it for the prescribed "90 meetings, in 90 days" if possible.

Routine:
0700 Wake-up / Breakfast
0745 Vitals / Meds
0845-0915 Morning Inspiration or Step Work
0930-1015 Focus Topic (Relapse Prevention, Nutrition, Assertiveness, etc.)
1030-1200 Primary Group Therapy (Dual Diagnosis Facility)
1220-1300 Lunch
1315-1415 Big Book / NA Basic Text
1430-1530 Wellness (Pool, Volleyball, Basketball, Weights)
1550-1630 Current Event Topic / General Discussion
1720-1800 Dinner
1800-1850 Stories From AA / NA
1900-2000 AA / NA Meeting
2015-2030 Wrap Up
2100 Vitals / Meds
2100-2250 Leisure (all inside by 2250)
2330 - In Bed

I encountered so many fucked up stories, I wouldn't even know where to begin. What's even more fucked up, is that I was generally liked by most of the patients. All I know is I'm never going back to a place like that...I hope. Just happy to be home and survive the airport without having a beer.

 

I was going to rep this, but I suppose it's appropriate for the thread:

Congrats, and best of luck. I recall you mentioning, on the old board, that you were fully aware that you're an alcoholic, but weren't willing to give it up then. Sounds like you've turned things around for the better.

 

They probably liked you because they sensed some sort of normalcy and wanted a piece of it. I don't mean this in a bad way but its very easy to become fixed on "getting what he has" even if you don't think its much. Its much more than what many addicts & alcoholics have.

If you or anyone for that matter has any questions about 12 step programs I'd be happy to answer them. Just thought I'd throw that out there.

And congratulations, the easy part is over. 90/90 is a good start.

 

This is so true. Man I hit my "pink cloud" early. I know you've heard it a million times already, but get a sponsor like now. I got a sponsor that has what I want but also has what he wants.

I'll check this thread later, on my way to my sponsor's house for fifth step at the moment.

Seriously congrats on getting sober.

 

The fucked up stories are the best part of being in rehab, my favorite guy in rehab was a crackhead germaphobe who liked to smoke crack and fuck prostitutes with no protection, but touch the cup his is drinking out of and he would kill you.

On a serious note, I am glad you made the choice to go and that you have made it through the first part.
Good luck on your sobriety.

 

Is Narconon the same group as Narcotics Anonymous?

 

No, which is probably for the best - I don't know if I could get clean with a name that sounded like a sci-fi villain

 

Congrats for taking the first step. As others have said, 90/90 is a good start, but it's not a cure, and just going to meetings isn't working the program. That phrase, "Meeting makers make it!" is misleading. It's a program of action, not assmosis. We don't "get it" by just sitting on our asses in meetings.

Get a sponsor--his job is to take you through the 12 steps. Trying to do it by yourself is the very definition of a "half-measure."

Trust the literature. I wasted a lot of time looking for "the loopholes" in the Big Book and the 12x12. Instead, I found that everything I read in both is true.

It does work, if you work it. Good luck, and add me to the list of TIB supporters if you have questions or feel the obsession/compulsion cropping up.