From Dana Gould's podcast: The Graduate: Even after fucking her mom the best way to win over a girl is to relentlessly stalk her until she caves.
2001: A space odyssey: Meteorite impact results in manslaughter, equipment failure, an acid trip, and a monkey riot. One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest: Lazy child-molesting con-man gives minorities erections and causes disorderly conduct, destruction of property, and prison break after anger management treatment. Mrs. Doubtfire: Depressed divorcee suffers identity crisis, but fails to lock bathroom door. Liar Liar: Small child manipulates parents' emotions with magical abilities. Lady and the Tramp: Pedigree papers ignored and wasted. Pulp Fiction: Misguided boxer kills repeatedly, interrupts anal. The Little Mermaid: Young woman can't escape smell of fish. Fight Club: Soap manufacturer experiences financial fluctuations. V for Vendetta: Burn victim spreads awareness of obscure holiday.
Human centipede: crazed German surgeon captures tourists and surgically connects them mouth to anus until they die or kill themselves. Ami doing it right?
Spiderman: A yerk takes control of the body of a homosexual suffering from aspergers, making him fall in love with a hillbilly doll. Willem Dafoe wanders onto the set unexpectedly after ingesting a large amount of acid laced robitussin.
War of the Worlds: Dramatic reenactment of Tom Cruise attaining Operating Thetan Level VIII-- as a father. Hairspray: I hear one of the girls is John Travolta. You Don't Mess With the Zohan: Adam Sandler shits hummus while sleeping for two hours. This whole thread is hilarious to me, can we just leave it up forever?
Roots: Black people win free cruise to America Sophie's Choice: Who wants to go on a train ride? Ides of March: George Clooney really wants to be a politician
A time to kill: Samuel L Jackson is a disgruntled janitor who shoots up a courthouse when 2 gentlemen were going to the bathroom and missed the toilet, hitting his daughter.