For those of you whose dogs shed, buy a Furminator. Used 2-3 times aweek, you'll see a remarkable difference on your floors. Order it from Amazon. It's half the price of what pet stores charge. And now, a dog fart story: One Thanksgiving, I gave some turkey skin and scraps to my Brittany. Later that night when we were in bed, Blaze was lying on the floor next to my side of the bed and she was ripping the foulest farts. And each time, she'd wag her little sausage tail. I could eat a half dozen bean burritos, two bowls of kielbasy and cabbage and wash it down with a 12 pack of Blatz and my farts would be floral in comparison. My dogs no longer get poultry skin and scraps.
My dog never farts and hardly ever throws up. This even after eating the stick of butter I pushed all the way back on the counter. She spent a lot of time outdoors after that though. When I taught swim lessons, if a kid threw up in the pool, we had to clear it, dump chlorine in it, and then it has to be clear of people for at least an hour I think. So I had this little guy and since they are just learning how to blow bubbles, he must have taken in some water on the inhale. Starts choking and I can tell he's going to throw up. I couldn't get to the side on time and I knew there was swim practice and I didn't want it canceled, so I caught his throw up in my hand. It was instinctual I guess. But oh so gross. I am so glad I don't work there anymore.
I once called Petsmart to see if they had a Furminator, and the girl that answered the phone was like "A sperminator? I...don't think we have those."
Not to bring down the thread but I will, I would give anything to have my farting, shedding dog back. A silent house is the worst.
I never knew dogs actually farted until I was at a girlfriend's house and we were making out in the hallway when I hear a loud *THUURRRPPPPP* and I said: "wow, way to kill the mood." She said: "No, it was Jamaica, I swear" I looked at the dog and said, "Dogs don't fart like th..." As I finished my sentence the dog let an even more enormous fart rip, and then got scared and started barking at her asshole.
I told a buddy of mine about the contest. He sent me this video link: Wha-? This was filmed at 6:30 am. At 3:46, her husband(?) walks into the kitchen like nothing is going on. "Hey, what's for breakfast?" "Well, I just ate all the cottage cheese, but there might be a five gallon bucket of yogurt left." Speaking of farting . . .
Watching people eat is one of the most disgusting things...ever. Yech. My dog is on a roll - he escaped the backyard and took off. Is it because it's the first nice day in like ever?
Made gumbo style chicken creole. Never tried a recipe like this, and although I had to take the onion out since my wife's allergic, wow that's good. Fuck, I had no idea how it would taste I picked it out of the hat.
Sitting in the airport bar and drinking a beer by myself while reflecting on my successful week of work is almost a religious experience. I'm imbibing and I am about to sleep in my own bed with my wife for the first time in six nights. It's so relaxing. Life feels good.