But see, people have fingers and monies. This dog has neither. I've even had to pull grass out of his ass. The things I do...
Re: Hurt his heel, had to cruise on back home I am so confused right now. And bewildered, be glad that so far the only thing you've had to yank out of his pooper in grass. It could get worse.
He pretends to sleep all day. The main neurotic thing about him is that he must be in sight of me or he gets depressed. He is always watching and by my side. Pretty sure he was abandoned... He just had a really honed prey drive. He's caught pigeons that were flying away out of mid air outside, and he loves chasing the white heron looking water birds that troll him at the park. He sees a white bird and just goes for it.
Mark has fingers, but no money. And, while I've never pulled grass out of his butthole, I have cleaned his vomit off of multiple pieces of furniture and articles of clothing. I'm not really sure why we're friends.
Time to break out the needle and thread and put him to work. Fixing screens is fucking terrible. You need to let him be drunk outside and hose him off when he's done.
I have walked into not only the screen on a sliding glass door but also headbutted the door in another episode. And my friends still love me.
Man, I am a tame drunk compared to y'all. For me, there is a lot of loud and excited talking, then dancing, then sometimes I puke a lot in the toilet (never eat peanut butter after drinking a bottle wine, the pukes are terrible). Once I puked on the side of the road. That's about it for me.
Well due to my Birthday celebration weekend before last, I left work early on Monday and had to pull over and puke. I looked up and realized I was across the street from an old folks home. How appropriate.
Re: Hurt his heel, had to cruise on back home Yes, I was kidding. (Although, it is funny, since kids today have no idea what a pop-top is, or how you could step on the part of an aluminum can that opens. "You mean, it used to come all the way off?!") My bad. We can't change fonts, or I would've used Sarcastica Bold. Seriously, though, y'all should know that if you're a Pop Tart fan, the low fat brown sugar and cinnamon ones are actually tastier than the regular brown sugar and cinnamon ones.
there are red velvet pop tarts. I kind of want one right now. Thank God you know the lyrics. I was genuinely confused.
The only pop tarts that are acceptable are the mint chocolate chip ones. You stick them in the freezer and eat them for dessert. All other times, don't get in the way of my bacon and coffee in the morning. You might lose an eye.
I used to eat breakfast. Now with the exception of some eggs and bacon and berries, I generally don't like breakfast food. Maybe waffles from time to time. I think it's because I started drinking a shake for breakfast, instead of eating 'real food'.
Oh, I forgot the butter and toasted oroweat bread. 5g of fiber per slice, times two, plus coffee= ? The biggest morning duke of your life.