gogurts pre-packaged snacks lots of cereal (name brand) lots of formula or baby food soda pre-bagged 'meats' LOOOOTTTSSSS of name brand junk. I have a bottle of Youngs Organic Chocolate Stout I may open here at work. It's already that kind of day. Jeepers.
Hell yeah Friday! I'm gonna get out of work a little early, hit up happy hour, go home to our recently perchance house that we're FINALLY moved into (for the most part), grill up some dinner, have a few more beers and just fucking relax. It's going to be awes- Oh wait...no. No, I won't be doing anything like that. Because my wife decided that since our house is all ready for guests, she should have company over. See, she's a Girl Scout Troop leader, so she and a co-leader decided that it would be super-hella-fun to have their whole Troop over to our house for a bonfire and sleep over! Fucking YAY! What ISN'T exciting about having 6-8 twelve year old girls in my new fucking house all night long? Well, since I never have to begin any sentences with the phrase "Pursuant to Meghan’s Law", everything is not exciting about it...I'm horrified. I'm not a huge fan of children in the first place, much less a throng of them. I've called up every single one of my so-called friends that live close by, in a vain attempt to get out of the house, and all I've gotten are several *snickers* and informed that they're busying tonight. Yeah, real fucking funny. Assholes. All of them. Every one.
Fuck that. I can't deal with other people's kids in my house. My kids aren't loud. Or destructive. Or needy. Other people's kids have no volume control and they need things. I like my kids. A lot. They're cool little people who've got opinions on things and make me laugh. They know when to push and when to let me alone, and they like having a good dinner around the table, talking about baseball and school and stuff. Other people's kids are all screechy and...yuck. No thanks.
You know what's great about teaching martial arts to kids? You get all that cutesy impact of being around a kid but you GET TO GIVE THEM BACK AFTER 45 MINUTES. Also parents pay you to yell at their kids in a way they are afraid to. Also I only work for 45 minutes today.
Good god, that's almost as bad as turd cutter. Why diminish a nice ass with a name which references stuff that's not pleasant at all? Cause neither are amusing.
I wouldn't want to be a celebrity. After you've done a hundred interviews, interviewers just go out of their way to make you look like an idiot.
I'd empty a 30 round mag into my face before I'd let half a dozen teenage girls into my house. Just get really shitfaced and pass out in the garage. It'll be better for everyone.
What happened to just having a few friends over for dinner and some drinks? Why turn it into the most annoying situation possible? Bonfires are cool though. Maybe tell them terrifying stories.
Either go to the bar alone or pick the friend that annoys you the most and crash his plans, both are far better than your current situation.
Leaving work in one hour to go see Robert Earl Keen followed up, for some godawful reason, by waking up before dawn to go fishing at the mouth of the harbor in below freezing temperatures. I have very mixed feelings about this trip.