good on you for trying to make her happy though. Have you considered that.... she might be the problem here?
Are you making a reference to the story about my ex-wife and the expensive jeans I bought her years ago? I'm pretty sure I told that story here.
No, I'm making a reference to the time I tried on a girl's yoga pants and she was legitimately angry at how good my ass looked in them.
In other news, I came into Christmas dinner like a wrecking ball. I went grocery shopping with my dad, and in the process of browsing the wares, somehow ended up taking responsibility for pretty much everything other than the prime rib, which was my dad's domain. I ended up putting a literal pound of butter, a bottle of maple syrup, a stick of lard, a pack of bacon, and at least two cups of brown sugar on the table. I think there may have been some vegetables buried under that weight as well.
What year was that? Because that sounds suspiciously similar to the time I tried on my ex-wife's jeans, and she was angry because my butt looked better than hers did. It was around 2003-'04, and they were a pair of Levi's Silver Tabs (remember those?). They cost $85, back when that was a really high price to pay for a pair of jeans. I wondered what was so special about them, and I inquired about women's sizing, and what it equated to in men's sizing. So I tried them on, and although they were a little tight, they looked good.
This is why my wife and I have decided that we just make our own lists of things we'd like and then send them to each other to pick a few things from. Yeah, it takes out SOME of the surprise, but it also guarantees that we're each getting things we already know aren't going to disappoint.
Or just be like me and the wife where we don't give each other gifts. We get what we want though our the year anyways.
if someone wants to be surprised but also is super picky, they don’t get to be angry without being called a bitch. “Fucking cunt” is also in play. I tell my wife to just get what she wants, and I’ll get her a few stocking stuffers. This year I got her an air tag set, and a tumbler thing that says “driver of the struggle bus.” That made her happy. Xmas should not be difficult, it should be fun. If someone makes it difficult, tell them to fuck off. Or get them something so horrible the following year that they get the message.
Friend of mine and his wife buy their own gifts at Xmas which doesn't seem to be too far out of the ordinary. But, then they'll wrap their own gifts and open them on Xmas morning together.
We just had our 19th Christmas together. It doesn't seem that hard. It's different each year. Sometimes I have great ideas and she gets a big surprise. Some years it's more practical. Occasionally something doesn't work out. We've had seasons where we spent more money, and others where we had to be more careful. But I always put in an effort, and if I was made to feel like that effort was worthless - even if the stuff didn't fit, or somehow wasn't right - it would stop pretty damn fast and I'd be evaluating what kind of person I was in a relationship with. Appreciative reception of gifts is as much a part of Christmas as thoughtful giving.
I enjoy trying to find gifts that the person would either, one, subliminally hints at throughout the year (say some tool that would make doing their hobbies easier) that makes you look like you put thought into it or two, something super practical and super useful that they'll end up using all the time (years past is was instant read cooking thermometers, this year I got everyone a head lamp). I had to fake enthusiasm from my brothers gift. He ordered it too late from amazon and told me it was coming in Tuesday, which kind of built the anticipation a little. He hands it to me, unwrap it, a rubber deer shaped trailer hitch cover, for a truck I don't have, and probably wont have, for a while. It might be the worst gift Ive ever got.
Growing up, Christmas was all hype and no delivery. @Kubla Kahn , if you think that gift you got was bad, we could swap stories. I was lucky if my birthday was remembered at all. It miiiight contribute to the SADS because who can't help but remember a lifetime of that when it rolls around again and again? These days, my gifting with hubs is pretty close to what @Binary described in his relationship. And he always remembers my birthday and celebrates me, so that's pretty nice. He's got a lot of emotional baggage around gifts stemming from childhood stuff but he's finally understanding that I am not materialistic and the thought and effort really does count, so he's getting less cagey and stressy about holiday gift giving.
My worst gift was from my brother. At the time, him and his wife were DINKS and they, as a couple, bought a gift for me and my wife at the time. What was the gift that two good income earners bought me and my ex as a "couples gift"? A DVD of Dodgeball: A True Underdog Story