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[WDT] NAME YOURSELF [NSFW]

Discussion in 'General Discussion' started by bewildered, Apr 9, 2021.

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  1. Kubla Kahn

    Kubla Kahn
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    Im a Jason. Unassuming and not particularly cool sounding to me. I dont dislike it but it is just meh. Not terribly common I was the only Jason in m high school. We just hired a Jason to my department a few months back and we still havent come up with a way to differentiate us.

    My stage name would be Gunner Stahl after the hunky aryan kid from The Mighty Ducks 2.
    [​IMG]
     
  2. Nettdata

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    I'm a Jeff. Jeffery, to be specific, because it's the last name of my mom's family. But that's my middle name because due to some Scottish family tradition, all the guys in our family have the same first name going back hundreds of years.

    It's a PITA, because I hardly recognize that it's my first name, but thanks to terrorism, EVERYTHING has to be legal name matching on all documents, forms, credit cards, etc, and hardly any of those systems are set up to handle the "yeah, but I go by my middle name" scenario effectively. The number of pissed off nurses in doctors' offices is surprisingly high, as they call me multiple times until I finally look surprised and answer to it. They inevitably look at me like I'm retarded for not knowing my own name.

    It's also a PITA at family reunions, back when that was a thing, as we'd be a group of 300-400 in Ontario farm country, and some wife somewhere would yell out "Hey Ernest!" and half the guys would look around confused.

    That being said, we do have a pretty cool family castle back in Scotland... and we were the Sheriffs of Inverness back in the day.
     
  3. NatCH

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    Inverness is a beautiful town, too. Go claim your birthright.
     
  4. jdoogie

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    I too, am a Jeff, but at least my parents had enough sense to spell my full name (Jeffrey) correctly. That being said, there's one thing both Jeffrey's and Jeffery's can both agree on... If you're named Geoffrey, chances are you are a right twat.
     
  5. sharkhead nachos

    sharkhead nachos
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    William Richard checking in. Obviously my parents wanted me to have some kind of nick-name and I ended up with the worst one possible - Richie. There's been like, 2 cool guys named Richie - Richie Sambora and Richie Sexton (for you baseball fans).
    Fuck, I hate that name and I still have aunts and uncles that call me that. And if for some reason they need to write it down, there's multiple ways they misspell it.
    I also prefer my middle name, so my friends just started calling me Rich, which is fine with me. At work it's Richard and I am also oblivious when someone tries to call me William. (My dad and grandfather were William) Also, part of that fun at work: since I work for a fairly large company, people who've never met me will email or IM me and will start the email/IM with, "Hey Will", "Bill, good morning" and all that.
    Added to the fun is that my last name could also be a first name so I have a few people that try to address me by that name. I mean, when you look up a name in a directory or emails, isn't it still Last name, comma, First name? Is that still a thing?
     
  6. Revengeofthenerds

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    My wife’s name is Amanda, but she goes by Mandi. I hate it. I think Amanda is a beautiful name, and every Mandy I’ve known has been a fat slob. She doesn’t give a shit, and in middle school went with the “i” because she wanted to be different. Her words.

    she disagrees with me that Mandy is a fat person’s name. We’ve agreed to compromise and I call her Mandi.
     
  7. Aetius

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    How dare you

    [​IMG]
     
  8. Revengeofthenerds

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    thicker than she used to be okay?
     
  9. Nettdata

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    Mr. Toast

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    Banned!

    Unbanned!
     
  10. Rush-O-Matic

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    I'm in the Jeff(rey) camp, too, and I know 4 Geoffs. I know of a couple others, and only one Geoff is not a twat. Of course we call him "gee off" - not Jee, but the g from golf.

    Jeffrey is two syllables and Jeffery is three, which is why the first one is correct.
     
  11. Nothingdoing

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    My first name is Rees, which is a Welsh spelling of a last name.

    Growing up no one ever managed to spell it right, and using got either Rhys or Reece.

    Even when I spell it out to people there is still a 60% chance that they put an e on the end of it.
     
  12. Revengeofthenerds

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    My physical therapist's name was "Karyn."

    Or at least that used to be her name. Given how much she complained about it, I'm sure she's changed it to something else.
     
  13. Misanthropic

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    Come on now. If it was Welsh there’d be 17 more letters, with clumps of unpronounceable consonants.
     
  14. Revengeofthenerds

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    If I farted, but can't smell it because of covid, then did my fart actually stink?
     
  15. Popped Cherries

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    If you've had anything to eat recently with Allulose in it, the covid might not be to blame. I had a couple of quest bars the other day and didn't realize they had Allulose in them, good lord....It's like a symphony with no music.
     
  16. Revengeofthenerds

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    the only thing covid allows me to smell is animal farts. My wife farted herself out of the kitchen last night and I didn’t realize what the problem was until she started laughing
     
  17. dixiebandit69

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    It's legally Kenneth, and I eventually got to Ken.
    Here's the story behind my name.

    To start, my mother decided that my name HAD to begin with a "K," so that I could have my grandfather's initials. She wanted to name me Karl (grandfather's name), but my dad would not have it (he apparently did not get along with gramps), and they settled on Kenneth*.

    Once I was born, my mom started calling me Kenny.
    My dad and I both hated it; I can't even explain WHY I hated it so much. I was just a kid; I didn't know jack shit. But I fucking hated it. It seemed like everyone else had cooler names. How many cool Kennys do you know of?

    Of course, since I was growing up in the '80s, and Barbie was THE toy for girls, there was no way that I was going to shorten it to Ken.

    So in the third grade, I decided that I was going to be know by my full first name.

    Here's the problem: NO ONE COULD SPELL IT RIGHT.

    I'd get "Kennith," "Kinith," "Keneth,**" Kinneth"... You get the idea.
    Also, if someone who did not know me read my name, they often called me "Keith"...

    Once I was a freshman in high school, I had a teacher who was really cool, but he had this habit of calling me Ken... And surprisingly, the class didn't break into laughter.
    That gave me the confidence to shorten it to Ken. I realized right away that dipshits would make Barbie references, but by that point, I'd developed a really sharp tongue, and I could shut down any jokester who decided to try me.

    Over the years, I've thought of legally changing my name to Ken, but it seems like too much trouble and expense.


    *Fun fact: My dad wanted to name me Charlie, after his best friend in college. I would have been okay with being a Charlie.

    ** "Keneth" is what the retards at the DMV put on the registration for my Firebird. EVERY YEAR that I would pay the registration, they would give me shit about the spelling on the name. The bureaucrat would say that it had to match my driver's license, and I could change it for a "small fee" of somewhere just under $100.

    I would say that it's their fuckup, because I've literally been spelling my own name for over 20 years at that point.

    "No, sir, you need to change it or we can't give you the new registration."

    Me: "No, fuck you, you granted the registration last year, and for the previous ___ years."

    It goes on like this for another 5-10 minutes, until a supervisor is called, and he tells me the same thing every time:

    "Okay sir, we'll do it THIS TIME, but next year you have to get the paperwork changed."

    FUCK BUREAUCRATS. FUCK THEM IN THEIR FUCKING ASSES.
     
  18. Rush-O-Matic

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    Kenny Wayne Shepherd
    Kenny Lofton
    Kenny Anderson
    Kenny Rogers
    Kenny Bunkport
     
  19. Puffman

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    Same name as Misanthropic. I agree with his statement in its entirety.
     
  20. Revengeofthenerds

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