I don't know if anybody saw this hilarious Twitter discussion about sleeping positions. https://twitter.com/AllanBell247/status/1219100842231521280 One of my favorite responses: Spoiler
And guess what? Those jagoffs get paid more than I do, AND they have benefits. If they were only making minimum wage, I could maybe overlook that kind of bullshit. Shit like that is why I despise government employees.
My kid actually sleeps that way, but shes in a crib and doesnt have a pillow. I sleep more like #2, the others are just odd. #8 is the weirdest one of all. Thats the position you sleep in when you're in prison, waiting for your celly to rape you in the middle of the night.
#8 is like caught in the middle of a dance move. #10 is the way you sleep when you've gotten ready for bed and then die. They couldn't get pajama guy to pose in three more positions? And, had to add cartoon girl? I probably go through all of those, except #13, in the course of a couple nights.
Yeah 10 looks like he had a stroke on his way to take a piss in the middle of the night and they found him in the hallway like that.
A little while back, I bought some button extenders for my pants. This wasn't the sort of thing I could buy at a big chain with the privacy of the self checkout lane, nor could I rip off the band-aid with a single purchase at a brick and mortar store. I ended up having to order them from Amazon, the abstract entity that will forever know that I'm currently having a hard time buttoning my pants. I had to submit that order and let my shame marinate while I waited for it to be delivered. Some poor bastard had to retrieve this item from the shelves and mail it to me. This morning, I gave up any pretext of dignity and daisy-chained two of those extenders together. #10 is actually my go-to position. I am only able to fall asleep on my stomach, but I also have issues with pinched nerves in my shoulders that mean my arms go numb quickly in most stomach-sleeper positions. I would bet that at least 50% of the time, my last thought before falling asleep is, "I probably look like a stupid asshole."