Kink-shaming is not allowed. So please, rural Americans, remember this: next time you feel the need to make up a fantastical story for attention, maybe you should just say “hey, wanna see my asshole?”
Yeah... the sad part is, NFTs are not only art collectibles. They are so much more, but everyone hears NFT and immediately relates it to the digital "art" collectible ponzi scheme scam. (Which they are).
Submitted for your judgement: My father in law has a poop tablet. It's a Samsung tablet that stays in the bathroom cabinet, for years now, whose sole purpose is to amuse him while he takes a dump. He has a laptop, a smartphone, and another tablet in the house. This one is strictly for pooping. It has a special Samsung charger, so he has to both occupy a dedicated plug and regularly charge it. Weird, or not weird? Does anyone else have dedicated bathroom electronics? It never gets cleaned so I always have this vision of 7 years of toilet spray leaving hundreds of layers of e. coli on it.
I have a waterproof bluetooth speaker in my walk in shower, so I can sit in there with a shower beer (or three) and enjoy the endless hot water while listening to music, an audiobook, netflix, or whatever else I pump through my phone.
Oh... and I would say, "kind of weird". More different than weird. He's just taken the concept of the readers digest or other mag designed for bathroom reading (that would normally sit in a basket or something beside/near the toilet) and made it electronic. I can see the thinking behind it, and at the end of the day, the dude is entertained while on the shitter. Who am I to judge?
In the before times I would have said he's all good, but since the advent of smartphones and especially since they got good and robust in terms of screen resolution, processing power, etc, I think he needs to justify why a dedicated tablet is necessary. If he has a valid reason why he needs the extra screen real estate, then ok, but if not, he should just be playing games or browsing the internet on his phone the way God intended us to shit.
He might feel weird having a device in the poop room that he'll later hold to his ear or handle and then eat food? The poop tablet is "dirty" but he washes his hands afterwards. I've never understood the long poop. Assuming there are no digestive issues, there is no reason to sit on the throne for 15-20 minutes. I'd say my average crap takes from sitting down to flushing, about 1.5-2 mins.
I can see a dedicated tablet for the purpose. Everytime I need to crap and don't have my phone on me, I have to go find my phone before going to the bathroom. Unless, of course, it is a true emergency and I don't have time to find my phone. I used to keep a basket of sailing mags next to the toilet. Now there is no reading material in the bathroom at all.
I don't care in the slightest that he wants a dedicated shitter screen, but it makes me laugh every time I see it out on the counter (which means he's either thinking about pooping soon, or has recently finished the deed). Made me wonder if anyone else had one. Personally, I don't bring any source of entertainment while on the toilet. Get in, poop, wipe sitting down like a civilized gentleman, and get out again. I'd rather read on the couch than hovering above the remnants of yesterday's burrito. Some people need some fiber in their lives.
I had a stack of Calvin and Hobbes. Comic strips are great because you can read as few or as many as the job requires.
Wait... he doesn't leave it in the bathroom? And yep, C&H were a bathroom mainstay in the days before smart phones.
Update: A healthy baby girl and a healthy baby boy have joined the world, on this the 26th of January. Rejoice! I'm super excited for both guys. They're stoked to be dads. Happy baby day, everyone!
He does, but he anticipates when he will be taking a dump in the next couple of hours, and removes it from the cabinet and places it on the counter next to the sink. Just to streamline the process of dropping the kids off at the pool. Wouldn't want to have to stop and get out the poop tablet when there's urgent business to attend to.
OK, so THIS is the fucked up part. I can totally appreciate a shitter-dedicated tablet, but the behaviour he has around it is the really fucked up part. It's like he's ritualized the process of taking a shit or something.
Weird on it's own? Yes. Weird if he's into blumpkins? Yes, but for different reasons. You should ask him about it and maybe get a peek at the internet history on that thing, just to confirm the suspicion.
I mean, there are certainly some things I'm less interested in knowing than my father in law's scat fetish preferences, but I can't think of many.
Well now that you know, it should clear up the confusion at least. Also, I don’t think it’s about the poop, at least not directly. I think it’s more about the alternating pressures put on the body. Anyway, good luck with your FIL’s poop blowies.