Last night I poured a full beer on my face after I passed out, and DIDN'T wake up. Fucking weird man. Just picked up some booze and about to start working on a nice little afternoon buzz. My friend got his wisdom teeth taken out today, to the entertainment of everyone else he's trying to drink a lil bit, all fucked up on morphine pills and vicodin pills. I have a feeling he will be puking blood by the end of the night. Mad respect for the guy though, his quote, "Dude, Sam comes to visit once every six months, I'm not going to let a little thing like this set me back." Right on.
Well, I'm about to crack open beer #1 and play Guitar Hero by myself for a while until I have to go meet up with some friends. That's cool, right?
Spent the past two weeks (and will spend the next year) assisting in a complete curriculum rewrite and redesign for a preschool. It is about as mind numbing as it sounds, and I am pretty brain dead at this point. Hopefully this Gin and Tonic will help me detox. If not, I have another 3/4 bottle where that came from. Cheers, y'all.
Tonight will be a celebratory shitshow with my friends. We're all naive, stupid, soon-to-be-unemployed assholes who are trying desperately not to hate the men we will become. We will win the day, or we will burn this fucking planet to the ground trying. Results are forthcoming. Christmerkin, vodka is a pleasant drunk.
Wait, before you answer that, let me just say that I got the 113th highest score in the world for Mississippi Queen on expert! Tell me THAT isn't going to get me laid tonight! Alright, well I'm off to start drinking with real people.
Well, it seems that a relaxing evening with my three buddies at the bar has turned into a night at the bar with the female half of our friends...plus girl-who-wants-to-fuck-me-but-has-a-boyfriend will be there as well. Should be an interesting night. If nothing else, I'm gonna get good and drunk.
Such fucking I.J. I buy a bottle of nice wine and on the way up the stairs it hits the wall lightly, and breaks.
I just watched inglourous basterds. I think the final scene in the theatre made me come in my pants it was so awesome. Neat fact: measles kill more people every year than breast cancer. Fires kill more people than prostate cancer. Bladder cancer kills more people than war. Wikipedia "cause of death" lists sure put mortality into perspective.
Just got home from a long evening at my godparents. I get together with them once a year around the holidays and just shoot the shit and catch up. It's been a long and stressful week at work so I poured a stiff jack and coke and am just sitting down to watch the 2nd half of the Nuggets and Cavaliers game. I love the Birdman.
Already, already drunk, the pool table calls. And then the bar afterwards. We'll see how this goes. Merry weekend to all.
My friend spiked my sandwich with the hottest hot sauce I have ever tasted. My mouth is on fire. This sucks. Luckily I am drunk.
^ Just be careful, I sprayed sriracha in my eye a little while ago. Accident. Wasn't fun. Led Zepplin is awesome and Kokanee is the beer out here. Yeah.
Just got home from a nightg of pizza and beers. good stuff all around. I love $2 drafts. rep edit: 20 micro-brews on draft. suck it.
Just got home from the new pool bar place in town. Got shitty drunk. blah blah blah blah blah blah. I hate my buddy's girlfriend. She has strong opinions on everything. Fine, whatever. I have no problem with people having opinions, even if they're different from mine. I can agree to disagree. But she goes out of her fucking way to get in a fight with you over said opinions. Me: Wanna hear a funny blow job story? Her: That's so disrespectful to women. What kind of man are you? BLAAAAH BLAAAAAHHHHH! Me: First of all, just because you're a woman doesn't men you deserve special, specific respect. If you want respect from me, you better earn it. And having a vagina doesn't mean you earn respect from me. Second of all, everyone has funny sex stories, males and females. Just because mine involve women due to my heterosexuality doesn't mean I hate women or have any less respect for them due to their gender. Third of all, you didn't even hear the story. You don't know that it's disrespectful, but you just assume it is. You suck as a human. Go find a drum circle, protest something, and shut the fuck up. Her: You're such a racist fascist PIG!!! Well I guess it's time to make a change. I don't want to bitch about my buddy's bitch all the time. That is just lame. So I guess it's time for me to avoid her at all costs. And since my buddy is ALWAYS hanging out with her, I guess I'll just avoid hanging out with him. It sucks, but hopefully he figures shit out before he decides to get married to this chick. Sorry for the drunken rant. I am dumb.
im sooo drunk that i thought id post a tidbit of my life on a forum. speaking of which, whats up with tidbits people!!! they are donut spares. you are eating spare middles.