Every time someone says Nicki Minaj is a good rapper/reinvented the rap game/made hip hop cool again, a baby dies. Because I kill it. In rage.
Do you use the opaque bag against a brick wall technique? While wearing your sequined dress? Also roxanne with your recent spate of posts, I think you're having a manic episode. If you're going to spend your life savings on gifts, spend it on me.
I'm bored in Vegas, killing time while waiting for our car to be fixed so I can drive it 22 hours to Portland with my mother. The only things I have the option of doing are getting drunk on message boards and getting drunk at shopping malls. DON'T JUDGE ME. And one always dresses up for ragekillings. It would be rude not to, and makes your victims think you don't care. Source: Roxanne's Book of Raging Etiquette.
I think our cat has been cheating on us. She came in a few minutes ago brushed out, and her whole body warm to the touch, despite the fact it is below freezing out, and the fact she has been out for 6 hours. I think I need to put a note on her "my name is smilla, I have a home, don't feed me" Do cats cheat?
My old cat used to disappear for a few days at a time. I never thought much of it. Until the downstairs lady said that he was hanging out at another dude's house. She said they took showers together. I confronted the dude and told him to stop feeding my cat, and stop taking showers with him (because my cat was also a dude). He said he would never stop. I sent my cat to live with my sister in Idaho after that. I thought it was for the best.
Good thing you're having drinks BEFORE YOU DRIVE 22 HOURS. Wear your new dress for the mug shot? It will be the only mugshot with leg. I just had bomb-ass (bombAY-ass? HORF HORF) Indian food in... a gas station. Dude apparently owns the station, it had an old A&W attached, voila, a curry joint. $8 goat korma beats the shit out of everything. Ever. I am now also completely inured to that goddamn horn they play in every f'n pop song.
Hey, I ain't driving the first leg of the journey, I can do whatever I want! And hooker, I really hope animal showering is not a "thing," but vast amounts of time on the internet tells me it is.
My bookish neighbor, "The Professor," is lying on his couch with the curtain wide open and whacking it. Anybody that walks by is going to get a full shot of one leg up over the couch and him biting his lip with his eyes closed. I hope it's a least a good porno and some Bronie stuff.
They definitely cheat. My cat was gone for a weekend, then another, then another, a week, thought it was dead, 2 weeks, came back, I guess it's not dead, 2 months, probably dead, and.. has a new name and owner two doors down. All because we got a puppy. Cats are bitches.
My cat has showered with me since he was a kitten. It's kind of creepy...he will come into the shower and chill as he watches me.
Our cats stay with us, shit outside, and bring us (usually) dead things to show us how much they love us. You all have terrible cats. Except for TX.'s cat. That cat has good taste.
Which is total double standard bullshit because when I do that it's called "creepy" 12 minutes then liquor store, steaks on the BBQ and poker night. However I seem to have developed Hiro's skill of stopping time from Hero's $15 bucks says his cat is a just a purrrrrvey dude with a handlebar mustache in THIS life.