Weekend Drunk Thread [3-12-10] SAINT PATRICK'S DAY

In the great words of Sterling Archer, "But would that cheer you up, me and you, a little revenge anal?"

I'm out for the night. Time to get more drunk. Smart.

 

And this one's for toytoy.

Not judging, just not my thing.

Sigh, I guess it would never work out with a French girl...

 

Fuck, I fell asleep and woke up an hour and a half later.

-4. Now I've got to go rent some skis and buy food.

 

Yay for people who host events that allow me to wear a dress and heels and be pretty!

 

"The weatherstripping for my Trans-Am finally came in! Fuck yeah!"- you know you're a gearhead if you post this.

 

I've been in a great mood since Wednesday.

Before Wednesday, I can't remember the last time I was in a good mood for more than one hour at a time, in 96 hour intervals.

And yes, I have a shit storm of badness coming my way in the next couple weeks, but after that I have a shit storm of goodness coming. So there is hope on the horizon.

Tonight? Hot girl I'm friends with is playing with her band at local bar. One of my best friends is finally done with a cycle of his cancer medicine that he can't drink with because it gets filtered through his liver, so he's coming out to get shitty. And, as of now, spring break has officially stared. It's on.

Right now though, I'm fucking starving, and someone at work is heating up something delicious smelling in the microwave. I'm going to go see if they are open to any interesting trades.

 

Yay! Me too. When I wear heels I'm 8' tall and it gives me a reason to shave my legs.

Jesus. Whatever happened to the fun drunk threads? This place has really gone downhill in my absence. Is Blue Dog still claiming sobriety?

In other news, I think I just inadvertently proposed to an ex via e-mail. She told me how rough a go she's having at things and I told her that she could stay in one of my spare bedrooms, but if my health went downhill she had to marry me so I could leave her my small kingdom. I've got to leave it to someone or else the state gets it.

That's not legally binding is it?

 

I have been abstaining from the alcohol while trying to train for an 8k. I fell off the wagon tonight and went to the local pub to watch some b-ball with friends and my doctor walked through the door. I tried to hide but decided to go say hello. Told him the first time in seven weeks I drink my Dr. Walks through the door. We had a laugh and five minutes later he sent me over a shot and a beer. Either the best Dr. Ever or the worst. Haven't decided.

 

Here kitty kitty!


I'm thinking this might be a pretty cool avatar. Or have I had too much this evening?

pinkcup is falling in love with me.

 

Only if she spends the next 20 years with you.


What exactly do you want to hear from us? That we drank a gallon of Jagermeister and fucked a Giraffe? That we woke up to four score and seven clowns leaving our dorm room through the window? That we started the night in a singles bar in Hoboken and ended it in a cave in Pakistan as a Taliban?

 

Yeah, I'd rep you for it. Of course I'd need pictures, videos, etc. etc. to really capture the images you'd be creating, but I'm sure in those exciting stories there'll be some dude with a camera at the ready.

 

That we're wizards who have learned to conjure exact replicas of ourselves which go out dicksmacking safari animals while the Originals sit at home talking to people on the Internet. In fact, you can take the first fifteen words of the previous sentence as the most plausible explanation for 50% of the stories told here.

 

this place is always my buffer when i stumble in an hour after last call, and instead of falling in bed i crack a beer. somehow justifies my excessive love for booze... (alcoholism is such a dirty word)

yay spell check...

 

What?

Going to bed. I can barely function right now. Seriously, I can't make this up.

 

These two go together. Yeah i'm coordinated like that bitches.

 

Guilty.

 

St. Patrick's: A Chronology

4:30pm--"I have an exam tomorrow that I haven't studied for. I should probably get started. What, dinner? Yeah I can grab some food, maybe one or two drinks."

6:00pm--Post-dinner to my housemate: "Hey, I'm going to study." (I proceeded to screw around online and drink a half bottle of Cabernet to keep my buzz going.)

10:30pm--South Park is over and my buzz is gone. To same housemate: "Wanna meet Brian at Steinkeller's? He's there with some of his friends."

11:00pm-12:30am--I decide that my one drink before going home should be a good one and order a stein of Guinness. I end up drinking three of them in just over an hour.

12:45am-2am--At the next bar: "I'm too full for beer now, I'll just drink gin."

7:00am--I wake up to study. The first two hours of that study time are spent groaning and trying to keep away from any and all sources of light.

 

Splash mouse #10.

I got this mother fucker with a hammer.

Either I'm getting quicker or the mice are getting slower. Or maybe I just got a lucky shot in.

Whatever. The righteous hammer of God (Me) came down on that little fucker's head, but I still have his buddy who raced away to deal with.

 

This snow is fucking up my plans. The pub crawl is out because my husband doesn't want to go that far in this weather. Now we're going out to dinner and to catch a movie with another couple. This is fine, we haven't went out with them in a while. Unfortunately it sounds like my friend is the one choosing the movie and my choice is between two chick flicks. I don't do chick flicks.

If I'm paying 8 bucks to see a movie in the theater there had better be some action, I would rather see every other movie that's playing than either of the two she suggested. I promise you this though, there is no way in hell I'm going to see The Bounty Hunter. I like Gerard Butler fine in action movies, but I'm not going to sit there for an hour and a half and watch him chase Jennifer Aniston around. No thank you.

Sounds like I will be drinking before we go, or possibly ditching them to see something decent.

 

Stand-up tonight. First time in 18 months. Brand new set. Never even did an open mic with it. Bunch of my closest friends in the audience. Nausea ensues.