I think people should just get right fucking cut. This IS a drunk thread, and facts show that people on here are funnier when they're snot-hanging drunk (see: Nettdata's redeye post last night).
Hmmm, I am at a loss as far as which of those topics I would like to pursue further. So, in the trend of the half naked, ABC and Fox banned this commercial even though they have broadcast Victoria's secret ads in the same time slot? Too much cleavage? Sizest? Or we can just talk about bouncy boobs. I think she is pretty hot even if she is a bit larger than your average lingerie model Edit - fucking link. And this post was made stone cold sober so is probably not a great topic for the drunk thread anyway (point taken Crown Royal - I'll come back tonight)
I thought this was the norm? My dick was the first dick the fiance had ever seen (even in pictures... she was, well, ultra-naive). Had no clue what they looked like, except for the general shape, which she gathered via various innuendos and dick jokes practically everyone makes. She thought dicks were wider than they were long (yes, a chode); she thought the "normal" size was about a pinky finger because that's what everyone made jokes about. Hell, about a month ago, after almost two years of being with her, I had to explain what "circumcised" meant, and she followed it with a facial expression like I had just murdered a puppy in front of her. So I'm used to her being fascinated with what is otherwise normal crap ("why is it veiny!! Oh, whoa...."). But the growing thing.... what the hell?!? How is that in any was interesting, or something all women don't already know about?
Fuck, I'm glad I cracked open that fresh bottle of Jim Beam before I clicked this thread (again). Jim and Soda Water is not bad... Happy drinking, fuckers!
That's disgusting! I wouldn't leave something festering up my twat for that long - I don't give a shit how much it can hold. Those new silicone cup things are pretty foul sounding too. You have to hook a finger in it and pull it out when it's full, hoping that you don't spill its contents. Then you have to rinse it out and put it back in. The logistics of doing this in a public restroom are more than I can bear. Thanks, but no. I'd almost rather bleed all over myself.
Throw a squeeze of lime in there and it's damn tasty. Just make sure to pour in more beam than soda, otherwise it just tastes like strong sparkling water. Another surprising one: dark rum (I used mount gay), a splash of club, and a twist of lemon. I used to get accidentally drunk on those, going 6-7 deep before I even realized what I was doing.
Those are the guys who throughout gym class were constantly saying "Time to hit the showers yet, coach?" ...because that was their stomping ground. They would laugh triumphantly with the haunting, booming taunts bouncing around the porcelain walls like fucking cracked-out Gummy Bears, and small nerds showering in their undies would shiver in fear and quietly dream up ways of killing themselves and who to take with them.
I try not to look when it's happening to me. It's not easy to conceive a kid with the lights off and a sheet is between you.
I made a beer can chicken and it is awesome. I love scotch too. I'm on the computer because I'm expecting a customer to email me today and the sooner I get it, the better.
You know, that's illegal these days. Something about "They have rights too, and are not property." Oh. Wait. By bag, you meant.... Nevermind.