The only place I've seen women dip is Wyoming. It has to be the single most repulsive habit a woman can have.
Re: Re: Weekend Drunk Thread, 5/17 Gee let me take a sec to weigh my options on that one... Dip I find just plain revolting. At least with cigarettes, smoking is cool but I just don't see appeal in this whatsoever. I remember when pro ball players used to spit it all over the field and dugouts, it was disgusting. Pat Borders still haunts my dreams. Funny thing: the biggest ladies man in my group of friends was the only one who used dip. He would stand their in the bar with his cup filled with Satan's feces in hand, looking like he got punched in the face, and would leave with the hottest girl in the bar. Confounding.
That's what's funny to me about dip, most everybody thinks it's revolting but smoking? Eh that's cool, no problem there. Just keep on blowing smoke, but fucking don't spit in a cup. Buddy of mine just swallows it, no spitting required.
I've never thought smoking was cool. I've never been a person who's tried to look cool, so I've never really seen the reason to do it. I've been with girls before who tasted like menthol. Nothing gets my engine going like that. With dip, its the spitting or the spit cup that makes it super awesome.
I'm glad I have gone months without putting in a dip. I used to do it regularly, finally realized how disgusting I felt afterwards. Not to mention it gave me random headaches. So not too long ago I met some chick out at the bars who seemed like your average, attractive 20-something type...that is until she pulled out a tin of Grizzly and threw in a big ripper of chew. I was completely stunned. Pretty sure she drank her beer with it in her lip as well. Of course I still had to get her number before the night ended.
Re: Re: Weekend Drunk Thread, 5/17 Grizzly caused my gum line to recede a 1/4 inch in high school, I don't know what the fuck they put in it but I haven't touched it in long fucking time. Long cut straight Cope is my go to.
My great grandmother, who was from south Georgia (basically the middle of nowhere) dipped. She kept a Maxwell House coffee can with her all the time. I never much enjoyed going to her house, although she was the best cook ever.
That's FUCKED. The junebugs are already outside, you can hear their enormous body weight slamming blindly into the west side of the house over and over in the hunt to nestle up pant legs and in your hair. GODDAMMIT. Creepiest insect, a giant flying beetle with the depth perception of a near-sighted mole. They eat trees like piranha, they are the true reason to own one of those electric-charged tennis rackets. The other reason: cornering your friend in his bed and zapping his bare feet. Cops do a variation of this. It's also the 17 year cicada summer or whatever the fuck, which means the loudest insect on earth will have a population increase by millions and millions. Those fucking enormous flies that shriek like plutonium-powered smoke alarms in the tree canopies will be out in droves this year. Not exactly a "bug friendly" summer around here this year. I hate bugs.
Creepiest insect that isn't a giant centipede, waterbug, or really any spider, is easily the palmetto bug. Think giant fucking cockroaches that meander into your home from outside. The kicker too is why they get frightened they fly, and fly right at you. Once I was trying to maneuver one outside. While doing this, the fucker decided it wanted to fly right at me. Thankfully for some reason I had a tennis racket or it would've flown into my face.
While not creepy, I feel for the people in Washington who are poised to expect MILLIONS of cicadas to spurt forth from the ground in the next little while. They've been underground for 17 years, are going to break the surface, fuck, lay eggs and then die. Can you imagine? Millions of cicadas just mating everywhere. It's like frosh week for bugs.
I would have to say that the Potato bug scared me as a small child. I'm convinced they were sent from Hell itself just to traumatize people and cause nightmares. Seriously, fuck those things.
TV Newscaster: "And in Washington today President Obama... Aunt: "WHAT HAPPENED TO OBAMA?" Me: "He said something apparently." Aunt: "Oh." 3 minutes later, still watching the news: Aunt: "WHAT HAPPENED TO OBAMA?" Me: "That's O.J." Aunt: "ARE YOU SURE?" Me: "Yes" Aunt: "I HATE THAT SON OF A BITCH" Lord do I need a beer.
House centipedes, yeesh. I know they're harmless, but those things look supernatural. They glide across the floor like a fucking ghost effortlessly travelling over every surface with their scary, giant insectoid cyborg legs.
You all are cute. We have mosquitoes the size of bowling balls out west. Remember the crypt in Temple of Doom teeming with dog sized bugs? Yeah. Roaches creep me the FUCK out, but when I was a kid (7ish) those cicadas nearly sent me to the mental hospital. Not just the noise, but their fucking red, dead eyes. They get inside your house, buzz around noisily, dive bombing you. They flop on the floor, whirling, screaming. Then go silent. You poke it with a shoe, nothing. Poke it again, it explodes into a frenzy of shaking and chirping until they, if you're lucky, die. They sound like a police whistle. Then they die and stick to whatever they landed upon, never rotting, preserved in that grotesque HR Geiger exoskeleton. The summer of one of the larger breeding cycles, we had them everywhere. Every tree, in the grass, on our lampshades in doors, under the couch. Fuck those things. You may ask, "why not just step on them?" That sends a shiver down my spine 25 years later. Imagine the god-awful crunch, and the goo that squirts out of a bug that big. And what if it doesn't die? WHAT IF IT DOESN'T DIE? "I will rape your dreams, child."
You will only see them here when they're dead. They get the nickname "Tree Toad" around here because they hide high in the tallest trees, croaking. Except it isn't croaking, it's an uzi being fired at a gong. And like dogs, they hear others and start screaming. If you're trying to relax outside they are the bane of your existence. If you do see them, they look like small bats.
No, my friend. No. They get inside. When they land on something, they stick to whatever they land on. They will cling to your shirt, to your arm... they will attach themselves to your hair. And they will never leave.