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Weekend Drunk Thread 9/14/12-9/16/12

Discussion in 'General Discussion' started by Nom Chompsky, Sep 14, 2012.

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  1. mav_ian

    mav_ian
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    Experienced Idiot

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    Oct 19, 2009
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    216
    Location:
    Victoria, Australia
    Why do I do this?
    Why not fuck girlfriend instead?
    Back in two minutes
     
    #241 mav_ian, Sep 16, 2012
  2. mav_ian

    mav_ian
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    Experienced Idiot

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    Victoria, Australia
    Meanwhile, in UTC plus 10 hours time...

    Sunday night is done
    Now it is Monday morning
    Oh shit I'm fucked
     
    #242 mav_ian, Sep 16, 2012
  3. Nom Chompsky

    Nom Chompsky
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    Honorary TiBette

    Reputation:
    68
    Joined:
    Dec 23, 2010
    Messages:
    4,706
    Location:
    we out
    I am no farmboy
    But I wake up each morning
    With a rising cock
     
    #243 Nom Chompsky, Sep 16, 2012
  4. mav_ian

    mav_ian
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    Experienced Idiot

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    Location:
    Victoria, Australia
    I am a farmboy
    Let me tell you my wife
    Feasted on my cock
     
    #244 mav_ian, Sep 16, 2012
  5. Juice

    Juice
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    Moderately Gender Fluid

    Reputation:
    1,452
    Joined:
    Oct 19, 2009
    Messages:
    13,970
    Location:
    Boston
    I have runny poop
    Mixed drinks was a bad idea
    My butt hurts me so
     
    #245 Juice, Sep 16, 2012
  6. mav_ian

    mav_ian
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    Experienced Idiot

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    You say your butt hurts
    It just leads me to think that
    Just he was too big
     
    #246 mav_ian, Sep 16, 2012
  7. mav_ian

    mav_ian
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    Experienced Idiot

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    You want me to stop
    But you all know the truth is
    Not 'till I pass out
     
    #247 mav_ian, Sep 16, 2012
  8. mav_ian

    mav_ian
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    Experienced Idiot

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    Victoria, Australia
    Each gulp I swallow
    Cheap bourbon and Pepsi-Max
    Destroying myself
     
    #248 mav_ian, Sep 16, 2012
  9. mav_ian

    mav_ian
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    Experienced Idiot

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    Annoying you all
    You created a monster
    This is not my fault
     
    #249 mav_ian, Sep 16, 2012
  10. Nom Chompsky

    Nom Chompsky
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    Honorary TiBette

    Reputation:
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    4,706
    Location:
    we out
    If you're 40 plus
    There's a good chance your vag looks
    Like beef. Boom, roasted.
     
    #250 Nom Chompsky, Sep 16, 2012
  11. Nom Chompsky

    Nom Chompsky
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    Honorary TiBette

    Reputation:
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    4,706
    Location:
    we out
    People should run but
    Ironically, poops should not
    Both should stay in shape
     
    #251 Nom Chompsky, Sep 16, 2012
  12. Dcc001

    Dcc001
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    New Bitch On Top

    Reputation:
    434
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    4,736
    Location:
    Sarnia, Ontario
    For Sack:

    [​IMG]


    [​IMG]
     
    #252 Dcc001, Sep 16, 2012
  13. JWags

    JWags
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    Emotionally Jaded

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    3,210
    Location:
    Chicago
    You rang?

    [​IMG]
     
    #253 JWags, Sep 16, 2012
  14. Danger Boy

    Danger Boy
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    Emotionally Jaded

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    133
    Joined:
    Oct 20, 2009
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    1,928
    Location:
    In a flyover state hoping your plane crashes
    Someone needs to tell
    Nitwit that Haiku poems
    Do not need to rhyme
     
    #254 Danger Boy, Sep 16, 2012
  15. Parker

    Parker
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    Emotionally Jaded

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    Location:
    Chicago, IL
    I'm so hungover
    I need water and chicken
    no watermelon
     
    #255 Parker, Sep 16, 2012
  16. CharlesJohnson

    CharlesJohnson
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    Nevermind women. FOOD PORN.

    Pork terrine wrapped in bacon, studded with pistachios and prunes. Pork meatloaf, bitches.
    [​IMG]

    Smoked pig's snout stuffed with more pork and it's tongue.
    [​IMG]

    Boned turkey leg turducken, confited.
    [​IMG]

    I am so fucking hard I could get a job making knotholes in fences. <a class="postlink" href="http://frombellytobacon.com/" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;">http://frombellytobacon.com/</a> is one of the best food blogs. Especially for peculiar eaters.
     
    #256 CharlesJohnson, Sep 16, 2012
  17. Gravy

    Gravy
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    Emotionally Jaded

    Reputation:
    256
    Joined:
    Feb 25, 2012
    Messages:
    1,715
    Location:
    The void.
    Can't add or subtract.
    I am only good with words.
    Still suck at scrabble.

    I meant for the contest to run to 10 pm central today. So that's what we are going to do (as long as the haikus are still cool by the mods).

    Keep them coming folks.
    Bukake of syllables.
    Aim for Ballsack's eye.
     
    #257 Gravy, Sep 16, 2012
  18. Sully

    Sully
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    Average Idiot

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    Messages:
    81
    Haiku make Zyron
    Feel retarded; he couldn't
    Write one if he tried
     
    #258 Sully, Sep 16, 2012
  19. Rush-O-Matic

    Rush-O-Matic
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    Emotionally Jaded

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    1,363
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    Messages:
    12,570
    The Idiot Board:
    Where intelligent discourse
    meets depravity.
     
    #259 Rush-O-Matic, Sep 16, 2012
  20. Pinkcup

    Pinkcup
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    Emotionally Jaded

    Reputation:
    20
    Joined:
    Oct 22, 2009
    Messages:
    798
    Location:
    Steel City
    Trapped, suffocating,
    A cocoon of fetid air
    I hate dutch ovens.

    Accidentally,
    I sent my grandma goatse.
    Disinherited.

    (Haiku with potential GoT spoiler below)
    George R. R. Martin,
    Finish the next fucking book.
    IS JON SNOW ALIVE??????????????????

    My boyfriend refused
    To let me warm my cold hands
    In his armpits. Dick.


    EDIT:

    My boyfriend refutes
    The previous assertion
    Says I do it "constantly."
     
    #260 Pinkcup, Sep 16, 2012
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