Awesome night tonight. Saw Pearl Jam and Alice Chains cover bands followed by a quick beer downtown. Pretty ordinary until I was leaving. Just as I was hopping on my bike to go home, who else would walk past by my ex, THE ex*. She was at a loss for words and forgot that she was with some other guy. I tried to be nice and introduce myself as a "friend" from school but she got pissed and blurted out that I was an old boyfriend. He kind of shuffled off to the side. I just laughed, put the helmet on, and left her standing there as I rode off. I barely said anything, but man did it feel good to interrupt their evening. *I'm sure I've mentioned it here before, but she was my first real girlfriend. We dated for a couple of years and during that time she cheated on me and was emotionally abusive. Although maybe I should thank her; she turned me into the emotionless pervert I am today.
If 'Hey asshole, stop using me as a body pillow, stop snoring, and fuckin' A Jesus, why did I marry your miserable small dicked ass' counts as Klingon, then yes.
It's like I've gone to heaven and they replaced St. Peter with a large Australian man who puts his arm around your shoulder and gives you a shot.
No, but one time she woke up and turned the light on, looked me dead in the eye, and grunted at me like a caveman. Then she lied back diwn went back to sleep. She still wont believe it happened.
I got punched in th throat by mine once. Apparently she was having somenightmare about snakes and she hammer-fisted me right in the windpipe. It sucked. I've accidently walloped her in the nose a couple times with my elbow over the years though. I always felt terrible about it, but a good ninja stays on their toes.
No, but she snores like I'm sleeping next to a wild boar. I have to roll her on her side and sleep with ear plugs. It was worse when she was pregnant and I actually slept in a different room several nights a week because I was literally getting 3 hours of sleep due to her snoring. But hey, she had the baby, so I sleep MUCH more now!
Some chick I sort of saw refused to use a pillow. She had DD tits. The amount of weight on her chest, plus the stupid angle her neck was at meant she spent all night sounding like a chainsaw sputtering. Stupid fuck. She really was intolerable in every way, but that was the kicker. Why didn't she use a pillow, so she could sleep on her f'n side, proper her head up? "It gets in the way." I long for the days when all a chick does is fart in her sleep.
The Guy's family is in town for a graduation weekend...this doesn't suck but...given the nature of our relationship the past three years, I don't know these people. Even so, I'm expected to be around and sociable. That's kinda the last thing I want to do. So I'm going to buy cake and cherry vodka, lemons, raspberries, strawberries, and sugar in the raw, and make some lemonade. Then I'm going to get drunk and pretend to pass out on the sun lounger. This is my way of avoiding hugs from people I don't know* and endless questions about the wedding. *Seriously, what is the deal with hugging someone you just met? Do normal people do this? I do not do this. I'm a handshaker and a stay arm's length away person at least until we have time to have a few beers...Other people seem to want to hug. All the time. It's weird.
I don't mind hugging to greet. Especially guys, who seem to hug better than girls. Girls do that fake no-touching hug that just seems like a waste of time. Ironically, though, I'm not a cuddler. There's only been one or two guys I could tolerate cuddling. All the rest make anxiety ratchet up and up as I lie there waiting for it to end.
It's such an intimate gesture for someone you barely know...I'm just not good at that. Makes me feel all trapped and stuff.
My friends and I don't hug, (even a bro-hug) but my brother and his friends do. It strikes me as very strange, especially since I'm obligated to hug everyone when I leave. Give bro-hugs to the guys, give cute little hugs to the girls. Even the ones that I met three minutes before. The thing is that it's not intimate for them; it's just something that they do to say goodbye. Once I realized that they didn't mean anything by it, it wasn't so weird.
So I don't hate the sensation of hugging, but the social rules around it make me feel kind of anxious. It feels very intimate when it's somebody you've just met, and yet some people do it right off the bat. I don't have a very physically affectionate family, so it doesn't come naturally to me, but I don't want to offend somebody so I often wind up just feeling kind of awkward. I generally err on the side of not-touching, though. Nothing worse than being up in somebody's space when they don't want you there.
I'm super touchy feely - I hug, cheek kiss, and say I love you to my friends and family at the end of every phone conversation. None of it is intended to be intimate or space-invading, just a sign that I accept you and probably don't hate you or feel creeped out by you. Creepers don't get hugs, they get pageant smiles and a wave goodbye. And occasionally a TPO. Hugs > TPO
After "recent events", the need for a rebound fuck has increased 1000%. I had 4 FWB off and on when I was single, and I figured even though it has been 3 years one of them would still be available. Turn out EVERY SINGLE ONE now has a boyfriend now. FUCK. One of them implied that she doesn't care but there is NO WAY I am fucking with that karma. Incidentally, a hearty thank you to all the TiBettes past and present who have contributed to the boobie/booty threads.
Really? I have an ungodly amount of chest hair but I haven't been able to work out in forever due to back problems, so I figured it would be unwanted. Hmmm...
Guys...I have an embarrassing problem. I've never successfully rolled a joint. I've tried once or twice, but it didn't really work. Watching videos online was somewhat helpful, but not as much as I would have liked. Anybody out there have advice for me? Considering the amount of times strangers have tried to buy from or sell drugs to me, you'd think I'd be a fucking wunderkind, but really I just look super spastic. If you don't help, I'm going to have to play Punch Out! sober, and nobody wants that. And by sober, I mean just after drinking, but still.